Artemis Meets Eragon Shadeslayer and Saphira Bjartskular and Psychologically Analyzes Them

Summary: Artemis Fowl was bored one day, so he decided to take a trip to Alagaësia. He got into a boat […]

3 votes, average: 4.67 out of 53 votes, average: 4.67 out of 53 votes, average: 4.67 out of 53 votes, average: 4.67 out of 53 votes, average: 4.67 out of 5 (3 votes, average: 4.67 out of 5)
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Artemis Fowl was bored one day, so he decided to take a trip to Alagaësia. He got into a boat and crossed the sea and turned to the first star on the right, ignoring the second, which led to Neverland.

He came to Alagaësia, and went promptly to Du Weldenvarden and Ellesmera. Eragon and Saphira were practicing flying manouvers when Artemis showed up.

“Hello,” he said, and peered closely at Saphira. “My goodness, you are blue.”

“Who are you?” said Eragon, glaring at the stranger. “You don’t look like you come from Alagaësia.”

“No, I come from another dimension, actually,” said Artemis. “And I have come to psychologically analyze you.”

He first looked at Saphira. “You have a lot of anger to work out toward the world. Notice how the tendons in your neck are standing out in a frantic attempt not to leap at my throat.  Also, are you aware that Bjartskular in the ancient language does not mean ‘Brightscales’ but ‘Brownskull’? I believe not.”

Artemis turned to Eragon. “And you! Don’t even get me started on your rudeness and socially unacceptable behaviour. If Arya doesn’t want you, leave her alone! Anything else counts as stalking and/or harassment. Also, through my studies of the ancient language, I have learned that Eragon actually means ‘Foolish, brash young lad’. Rather apt, if you ask me.”

And without a second glance, Artemis Fowl walked back into the Du Weldenvarden woods, leaving Eragon Shadeslayer and Saphira Bjartskular gaping incredulously after him.

Comments on This Post

17 responses to “Artemis Meets Eragon Shadeslayer and Saphira Bjartskular and Psychologically Analyzes Them.” Join in!

  1. I just read this over, and it was hilarious! I needed a way to vent, and this helped a lot. 🙂

  2. Well then. I’ve never read Eragon, but this was HiLaRiOuS!!:lol: It surprises me how IC Artemis was for a story like this. XD NeVeRlAnD…. Well…. Updateth?

    ~CC

  3. Hermione Fowl March 6th, 2010 at 6:04 am 3

    Your crazy, insane, random, whatever you want to go by. I go by random. =)=)

  4. . . .
    Better than the movie 😀

    Well, I like it. It’s not perfect, but I like it. Funneh.

  5. Thanks you guys! I had no idea that Arty was IC.

  6. Loved it. The film was nothing compared to the book…I hated the film.
    Anyway yeah Arty was IC and it was Hilarious!!

  7. Thanks! Arty’s character actually had me worried. BTW, do you guys think I should change my name back to LesserMindSet?

  8. *shrugs* Your choice. By the way, this is also your choice, but if you wanted to make the title a bit shorter, psychologically analyzes them is pretty much the same as psychoanalyzes them. Just a suggestion.

    Personally I might get a bit confused if you changed back to LesserMindSet since I’ve always known you as Ohan, but it’s your choice.

  9. Ohansahyosheli March 28th, 2010 at 11:14 pm 9

    OMG. I had forgotten about this story. I read it over, and it’s actually hilarous. 🙂

  10. haha! I tried reading eragon (too much detail), but I saw the movie (which sucked, and even I knew it). LOL! Love it. 🙂

  11. 1. Sorry for double posting.
    2. Sorry that i gave you a four, i meant to give you a five. 🙁

  12. 🙂 *considers* LMS is easier to spell…. XD Meh kiddin. Do whatcha like.

  13. XD
    After just watching the Eragon movie and feeling depressed at how bad it was this made me feel much better.

  14. Artemis, Eragon AND Saphira were all IC! And Eragon is indeed a foolish, brash young lad. CURSE YOU PAOLINI! FOURTH BOOK ALREADY!

  15. IKR!!! Paolini needs to get his sorry self a-writin’ before the end of the world comes! :O

  16. The film sux, but the books are great, arty IC, you rock, and
    I LOVE BURRITOS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    P.S. this is probably part spam

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