Artemis Fowl: Bleak Horizons

Summary: It’s ME! I, Orion Fowl, have returned. Yes, after several months and very many non-updated fics, I’ve returned, with a […]

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It’s ME! I, Orion Fowl, have returned. Yes, after several months and very many non-updated fics, I’ve returned, with a good, ol’ fashioned AF fic!!! CHEESE AND CELERY BITS!!! Yes, as I’ve said very many times before: Insanity Never Dies!

This is gonna be big, Big, BIG.

So now, presenting an Orion Fowl & Co production…

Bleak Horizons: Part One: The Coming Dread



Prologue: Ashes of an Empire

  There were ruins, ashes, as far as the eye could see. Rubble was strewn across the barren wasteland. Entire buildings lay, collapsed, across the street. The occasional gruesome arm, leg, or body part stuck out from underneath the rubble. Cars lay destroyed on the side of the road, steam rising from their burning engines. Amidst the ruins, a small, almost childlike figure shoved through the destroyed rubble.

LEPrecon Major Holly Short kicked aside a cracked piece of Mud-man masonry. Holly wore a striped LEPrecon battle suit, a heavily protected version of the LEP armor Holly used daily. Her eyes sifted from side to side, peering through the tinted visor. Above her, the hot, blazing noonday sun shined down on what had been Dublin, Ireland.


“ARTEMIS!!” Holly yelled again, her throat raw after hours of screaming.

No reply.


A tear streaked down Holly’s face, landing on her visor.

This couldn’t be happening. It seemed…ethereal. It was as if she was watching a dream, someone else’s horrible, horrible dream. Someone else’s nightmare. Holly stumbled slightly, and her arm lunged out instinctively to stop her fall. Her bare hand landed on a rock slick with red liquid.

Blood. Her hand was on someone’s blood.




Chapter One: Don’t Spoil the Children

Dublin, Ireland.

  In the throng of people at the highly popular Three Clovers mall in Dublin, not much drew the eye. The wandering masses rushed to and fro, darting into shops and out of them faster than the eye could follow. But one strangely peculiar scene drew the eye.

A boy, about 16 or 17, sat at a small, round, porcelain coffee table. in his hands he held a drink. But that wasn’t strange. What was strange was that he was wearing a tuxedo. Any 16 year old wearing an Armani dress suit in Dublin, in the middle of the summer is very strange.


Artemis Fowl sipped tentatively at the ice-cold coke he held clutched in his hand. His face contorted horribly, and he forcibly swallowed.

“That’s right. Drink it all up, mudboy.”

Across the table from him was Holly, a cocky grin on her face. She was wearing a T-shirt and jeans. The T-shirt read “Fairies PWN u”.

Artemis glared at her, a scowl spreading across his face.

“Holly, this is ridiculous! I mean, this..soda…thing has far too much Corn Syrup in it. It’s sugar and water! There’s no nutritional value in this whatsoever!!”

“It’s not nutritional, it’s tasty.” Said a voice from nowhere.

Artemis scowled.

“Foaly, no one asked for you to intrude!”

“Intrude? Well maybe you should have thought of that before letting me install a communication chip in your brain!” Came Foaly’s snarky retort.

“One that’s only supposed to be used on missions!”

“You are on a mission! Now stop guzzling Corn Syrup and keep an eye out for the smuggler.”

“Guzzling, my-”

“Stop it! We have work to do.” Said Holly sharply

“Holly’s right. We’re here to bust the Sprite smuggling operation. If they get those weapons to the goblin triad, it means I don’t get to go to Rio next month, because I’ll be too busy keeping scaly d’arvits from overruning Haven.”

“How under Earth can a centaur go to Rio?”

There was a pause for a minute, then Foaly spoke.

“Shuddup, mudboy.”

Artemis smirked and coolly tossed the soda into a bright red trash can.

Holly sighed.

“Foaly, where are the goblins supposed to meet with the sprites?”

“…oh. Artemis, um…”


“Heh-heh. Someplace called…Victoria’s Secret.”

Artemis’ eyebrow rose slightly and a faint smile spread across his face. Holly caught it and scowled.

“Oh, hell no. You’re staying behind, you perverted mud-boy.”






Comments on This Post

15 responses to “Artemis Fowl: Bleak Horizons.” Join in!

  1. Hello, Orion Fowl, Master of Insanity, This was a generally good start, it cougght my attention very fast, keep it up Mr. Fowl/Insanity. Please update 😀

  2. the huntress (or tress) January 8th, 2012 at 1:11 am 2

    I like your fic! Artemis is very in character, and the beginning is very catchy. (the Victorias secret part was HILARIOUS!) love it and pleeeaaaassssee update!
    …….or face the wrath of the huntress…. 🙂

  3. Artemis you perv! Ots a great opening, orion! Update! Pwease?

  4. Heh I like it 😀 Very good! I enjoy reading yhur fanfic Orion 😀 I look forward to reading yhur update. five stars.

  5. LOL

    Are you contunuing The End of Ages? Cuz if you’re not, I’m drowning you in melted ice cream.

    Keep going! I want to see this.

  6. Hmm. I have become an extreme critic of late, SO:

    a bit of capitalizaton errors, a bit of punctuation, and… well, no, my opinon stays out of this (its not bad, but it’s not relevant.)

    Anyways, it wasn’t too bad.

  7. Drowning me in melted Ice cream….Well, anyway, TO UPDATE! update, coming soon!

    : )

  8. Hi, I’m new and made a truly terribe story. Anyway I love antthing you’ve made. Please make more!

  9. i think you hav pulle off colfer’s style completely !! it is just like a real a/f book. please update imm

  10. I really love the way this was executed Orion! Also because of that I give you..DUH DUH DUH DUUUUH!!! A large box ox assorted sweets! *hands box of of sweets* and further more,because I have read many of your things and I noticed you often said,”Lollipops and Ice cream!”, Sometimes I say that instead of saying “here” during roll at school!I love the prologue after reading that I couldn’t help but be fascinated! I hope I can be as good of an author as you one day!

  11. LEPofficerHollyShort February 20th, 2012 at 3:35 am 11

    So funny pleezz tell me when Artemis enters the land of the woman’s undergarments. LOVE the plot *hugs fake A/F plush*

  12. An interesting story, but what in Frond’s name happened to Dublin?

  13. That’s for me to know, and for you to wonder about…

  14. I. LAUGHED. MY. (_I_). OFF.(BUTT)

  15. I’m baaaack.

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