Artemis Fowl # 9: Ascension

Summary: Artemis Fowl is back from the dead. But now, he must control his unlocked magical powers, save Haven from a wicked foe, and avoid execution.

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Why, hello there. It’s me, Orion Fowl, King of the Insanity Ward, bringing you another fic made with love, care, pre-algebraic-equations, and LOLLIPOPS AND ICE CREAM!!! But before you succumb to my highly infectious insanity, I’d appreciate it if you read the story below. I’ve wanted to create a book 9 for the longest while, as the end of book 8 left ALL SORTS  of ideas bouncing around in my mind. And, as I’ve said before, INSANITY NEVER DIES!! So,folks, why don’t you pull up a nice glass of root beer, grab some lollipop-flavored pizza, and sit down to read the latest production by myself, the MASTER OF INSANITY!! Remember kids, LOLLIPOPS AND ICE CREAM!!!! 




Ascension: Part The First: A Game Of Mind And Matter


ONCE upon a time, there was a boy, a very special boy. This boy dared to defy the laws of reality it’s very self. He sought that which was said not to exist. He fought demons in worlds beyond our own. He battled horrifying creatures in ancient labyrinths beneath the world. He consorted with madmen and fairies. It is said he was called by some “Fowl”. And he was odd, so very odd. All his life, he was guarded by a giant  of a man, and it said he walked paths not yet seen by mortal mind or eye.


And then it came to pass, that in time, he gained enemies for himself, and friends, too. And He fought, above and below the world, things that no human mind can comprehend. But no man is immortal. And genius he was, Fowl met his end. But even then, they say, he returned from the dead. Whether this is true or not, I cannot say. But let me tell you a tale, that happened once, so very long ago. A tale of war beyond  epic proportions, a game of mind over matter, a love beyond bliss, and death beyond the veil.

This is the tale of the Last High Fairy War.


The First Ceremonial Temple of the Hey-Hey Monks, Haven City, Nine months after the Battle of Fowl Manor


Artemis Fowl the Second was floating. Or, to put it correctly, he was levitating. A faint purple aura surrounded him, and it grew brighter by the second. He was dressed in pale white robes, and his eyes were closed. He was floating a few feet off of the ground in a large chamber decorated with ornate bronze runes and huge marble statues. A low humming sound filled the room. As seconds passed, the purple aura grew brighter and brighter, until, eventually, it spilled off of Artemis in waves.

But deep inside his own mind, Artemis noticed none of this. He was thinking. He was immersed deep within the layers of his mind, recounting the facts over and over again.

My name is Artemis James Fowl the Second.


Faries are real. 


Opal Koboi is dead.


I was dead for six months. I am alive. 


I have no recollection of anything before 3 years ago. I have kept my knowledge and mental faculties  but many major facts have been eradicated by the six moths I spent in ethereal existence.


The cloned cells in my body, combined with the magic used to grow the clone and the sudden way my soul entered my new form, have resulted in the unlocking of the Ascension Gene in my body. The Ascension gene allows faries to use magic, and has unlocked the dormant magic inherent in my body.


I am supposed to be dead.

The purple aura around Artemis’ was becoming vibrant, waves of energy rippling off of it. The ground in a small circle around him began to dissolve.


In the eyes of the people, I am an abomination of magic. I am going to be put on trial for crimes against the 15th law of the People in two months. I have those same two months to master my new-found magic and prove to the Council that my magic is not unstable, or I will be executed.


Artemis’ eyes shot open. For a brief second, they glowed purple, then snapped back to their usual blue. Artemis landed in the center of the circle of dissolved tile with a dull thud. A faint wisp of purple magic drifted before his eyes, then vanished. Artemis sighed. On the far side of the room, a large door opened. A small figure clad in the same white robes as Artemis walked up to him. The figure thrust down it’s hood, revealing itself to be N°1, Artemis’ demon friend from Hybras. N°1 sighed.

“Artemis, you only lasted 12 minutes this time. You need to spend at least an hour in deep meditation controlling your magic for the Council to even begin considering letting you live. ”

Artemis sighed and grasped N°1’s arm, using it to pull himself up. When he stood at full height, Artemis glanced down at the stumpy Warlock, and sighed again.

“I know, N°1, but it’s hard. I can’t keep my emotions under check enough to stabilize my magic. And now I’m drained, so I can’t even try again.”

N°1 bowed his head sadly, scared for his friend. With a deep sigh, he rested one of his hands on Artemis’ arm.

“Hold still for a second, Arty, I’m gonna replenish your magic so you can try again. Qwan taught me how.”

The demon warlock went silent for a few seconds, then Artemis began to feel a sensation of power coursing through his arm, filling the rest of his body. In a minute, his power was filled to the brim. A few wisps of purple energy darted around Artemis’ body, fixing up a few minor bruises he had from falling from 8 feet in the air.

Artemis straightened himself and began to prepare to meditate again. Suddenly, the door N°1 had walked through opened again. A pixie dressed in the same white robes as the others, albeit with a green trim, walked into the room. He was one of the Hey-Hey Monks. The monk was holding an official-looking document. The pixie stopped a few feet from Artemis, casting a wary look at the human and the few wisps of purple energy still cracking in the air around him. His eyes fell on the patch of destroyed ground.

“Mother of Futiaan!! You’ve destroyed holy ground with your magic!! How dare you-” The monk cut himself off ,taking in a deep breath. His face, which had turned beet red, resumed it’s normal color. Artemis blushed with embarrassment,  N°1 made a few apologies in Gnommish, and then asked the monk to read the letter. The monk glared at Artemis, then unfurled the paper, which was necessary as the monks allowed no type of technology within the sacred halls of their temples, and read from it.

According to the letter, Artemis was supposed to report to LEP headquarters at the command of Commander Trouble Kelp.  Artemis sighed and turned to N°1.

“I’m sorry, but I have to go. I’ll be back tomorrow to continue the sessions, OK?”

N°1 nodded, then turned from Artemis as a tear crept down his cheek. The demon wiped the tear away, and began to repair the destroyed patch of ground with magic.






Comments on This Post

3 responses to “Artemis Fowl # 9: Ascension.” Join in!

  1. pretty good.last time i read this i didn’t understand because i hadn’t read last guardian.i finished it about a month ago.your story is really good even if i haven’t read part1 or2 yet

  2. oh sorry this is part one…didnt realize that.anyway, update or face my wrath!!! no seriously,updaate.ive been waiting

  3. i hope the ninth book is good to read when the author is finished ha-haha i think eoin colfer has a bad case of the humor doing this. right guys?

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