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What Now?

Summary: Please don’t read this if you don’t like slash, crack pairings, silly one shots. Not appropriate for younger peoples. Also, warning. […]

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Please don’t read this if you don’t like slash, crack pairings, silly one shots. Not appropriate for younger peoples. Also, warning. Detailed getting undressed scene. You know you like it… 


Foaly entered his apartment, Artemis following him. Artemis looked around. The apartment was small and cluttered with furniture and technology. It was dusty but welcoming. Artificial sunlight lit up the room through a small window.

“Well,” Artemis said, “It looks lived in.”

Foaly whinnied, embarrassed. “Of course it’s nothing compared to your manor,” he admitted.

“It doesn’t really matter what the apartment looks like,” Artemis said. “I care only for the fairy who lives in it.”

He took off his suit jacket and slowly, seductively loosened his tie while Foaly watched, a mixture of lust and love on his face. He walked over to Artemis when he had removed the tie and helped him undo the buttons on his shirt. Foaly then removed Artemis’ shirt, his hands lingering on Artemis’ bare flesh. He then brought his hands up to Artemis’ face as he gently kissed him.

Next to go were Artemis’ pants. Foaly swiftly removed Artemis’ belt then pushed him down onto the bed. He pulled off Artemis’ pants and threw them across the room. He looked Artemis over then climbed onto the bed next to him. He leaned over Artemis and proceeded to kiss him all over, his thighs, stomach, chest, shoulders, neck and eventually his lips. Artemis responded to the kiss, grabbing at Foaly’s hair, pulling him closer. Artemis was hot with arousal, barely able to contain himself when Foaly hesitated.

“What’s wrong?” Artemis asked. “What are you waiting for?”

“Oh, nothing,” Foaly said. “It’s just, uh, how are we supposed to do this?”

Artemis sat up and stared at Foaly’s bottom half, frowning as he realized the problem.

“Well, you’re the centaur,” he said, “What do you want to do?”

Foaly thought for a moment. “Maybe we should experiment,” he suggested.

Artemis’ mind was instantly filled with thoughts of awkward, painful positions and hoof shaped bruises.

“No thank you,” he said. He got out of bed and quickly got dressed. Foaly stared at him as he walked to the door and opened it. Right before he walked out he turned to Foaly.

“Goodbye, Foaly,” he said, “I hope you have a nice life.”

He left.

Comments on This Post

29 responses to “What Now?.” Join in!

  1. no offense, but that is incredibly inappropriate.

  2. … What?

    What WAS that??

    … On second thought, don’t answer. I really don’t wanna know.

  3. MuriUmbrielCordeliaN August 23rd, 2009 at 3:24 am 3

    You should put a warning or something at
    the beginning of this.There are a few young
    kids on the site, and I don’t think this
    is really appropriate for them to be reading.

  4. artemis fowl fan 77 August 23rd, 2009 at 2:33 pm 4

    I mean No offense but murie is right. And once again i mean no offence but…… i really don wanna no

  5. MuriUmbrielCordeliaN August 23rd, 2009 at 4:01 pm 5

    MURI!!!Why does everyone get my name wrong?
    It’s M-U-R-I(mm-yer-ii!)

  6. IwishIwasafaerie August 23rd, 2009 at 4:04 pm 6

    uhhhhhhh…………………dude. This is kinda well freaky.

  7. artemis fowl fan 77 August 23rd, 2009 at 5:48 pm 7


  8. IwishIwasafaerie August 23rd, 2009 at 5:59 pm 8

    Why is you sorry? This aint you story.

  9. um i’m kinda on of the ‘ young kids ‘ ( 11 and 1/10th, never seen an R movie but i’m begging to.

  10. ARTEMIS FOWLFAN77 August 26th, 2009 at 7:50 am 10

    I said sorry to muri because i spelled her name wrong

  11. Ohansahyosheli August 27th, 2009 at 5:22 pm 11

    I’m 12, and I have read worse things. Still, kind of gross.

  12. Don’t worry about it ARTEMIS FOWLFAN77.No
    one gets that right, and no one gets my real
    name right so I’m used to it.Just use Mur(mm-yer).It’s a whole lot easier than ‘MuriUmbrielCordeliaN’.
    Ohansahsyosheli:I’m 12 too, and I’ve read
    waaaay worse things.But they were in the
    back of the library, labeled ‘8th grade and up’.Or something like that.I don’t think I was actually supposed to read those, but it’s not like any of you will(duh duh duh)
    ‘tell on me’.(Will you?)

  13. The Weird Shipper August 30th, 2009 at 2:50 am 13




  14. ARTEMIS FOWLFAN77 August 30th, 2009 at 12:35 pm 14

    I dont think i am commenting this story again or goin into it for that matter so goodbye for good from this story only.

  15. The Weird Shipper August 30th, 2009 at 11:08 pm 15

    “Please don’t read this if you don’t like slash, crack pairings, silly one shots”

    You were warned, quit being so dramatic.

    (*cough* Artler yaoi on, please *cough, cough*)

  16. partyonsoccerfan August 31st, 2009 at 2:19 am 16

    Nice story. Strange but….

  17. Ohansahyosheli September 3rd, 2009 at 2:56 pm 17

    …okay. Well written. Will SOMEONE go to the shoutbox on Fangathering before I self-destruct!!

  18. Ewww…
    Caballine wouldn’t be happy if she found out

  19. Ohansahyosheli September 7th, 2009 at 3:40 pm 20

    You got dat right…

  20. Holly Short LEP September 8th, 2009 at 2:30 pm 21

    That was creepy… really creepy…

  21. *feels urges to puke, scream, and laugh maniacally all at same time* So detailed, which is what makes it so incredibly frightening. Not that I haven’t come across my fair share of… erm… scenes in my fourteen years, but still… If I end up having the most completely freaky dream ever because of your fic…. 😯

    Question… How old are you?

  22. Sorry for any future bad dreams I cause. I’m 16, almost 17.

  23. Never watched an R movie o.O My first was when I was 12 (Saw). This is sorta freaky but we’ve all seen worst, like in books and erm…. well….. Sick people hub goin’ round there.

  24. effin weird dude

  25. duffman! Watch your language!

  26. yeh duffman, effin watch ur effin language! lolz that felt good….wait…no offence, but with this story that sounded soooooo wrong…..*backs away slowly*

    btw ive seen/heard/read worse….ima 12 almosr 13…..yeah…

  27. I’m 12, and I really don’t mind this sort of thing. You see it everywhere, and we’re not going to be able to avoid it, no matter how hard we try.

    It was well written, though short.

  28. I’m 13 and I FRIGGIN LOVED THIS! don’t kill me for language, WE. It had to be said. 5/roses!

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