B’day wishes for Artemis Fowl

Summary: Prepare to ROFL. really.

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Random one shot. Based off a dream of mine.


Time 10:45

Artemis observed the photograph under the torchlight.

She looked amazing.

Those elfin eyes were gorgeous. She was undoubtedly the most beautiful creature on or under the surface of the planet. Those features were indescribable. He sighed, somewhat dreamily.

He was interrupted by a knock on the door.

“Hey, Arty!” called a familiar voice. “Will you open up already? I mean, let us in so we can do your D’Arvitting surprise party!”

“Mulch!” hissed another voice. “Shut up, you’re blowing it!”

“You never cared either, Pony Boy.”

“Will the both of you zip it?!”

“He started it!”

Artemis raised an eyebrow. This is unexpected. He crawled from under the sheet, slipped off the bed and opened the door.

“HAPPY          BIRTHDAY!”  yelled  fifteen voices simultaneously.

In the doorway stood Mulch, Foaly, Holly, Trouble, Butler, Minerva, Spiderman, Batman, Joker, Tom, Jerry, Pinocchio, Moby Dick and every freak on the planet.

“W-What?” stammered Artemis.

“Happy Birthday, Mud Boy,” said Mulch, stepping inside. “I kinda forgot your present.”

Foaly snorted. “I got ya something way better.” He tossed a horribly wrapped box. Artemis caught it, clumsily.

“I had to get you something,” muttered Trouble, doing the same as Foaly.

“Happy Birthday Arty!” said Holly, kissing his cheek. “And here, I got you this,” she handed him a Neutrino 9000.


“I couldn’t think of what to get you,” admitted Butler. “Maybe later.”

“Sorry,’ said Minerva. “They told me about this only yesterday and I couldn’t get you anything.”

Artemis couldn’t even count the amount of stuff he received from Mickie Mouse, Garfield and the freaks.

He stared at the unexpected amount of people inside his bedroom. Smiling weakly, “Eh, Thanks?” was all he could come up with.

And then all hell broke loose.



ScoobyDoo started looking for the bathroom.

Daffy Duck went around the place hanging streamers.

Garfield kept looking for the fridge.

Spiderman used snow spray on the walls.


Mulch sat on the bed. “Hey Arty!” he called, after a while.  “At this time of the night, do you actually keep drawing hearts around pictures of Holly?”

“Put that down!” yelled Artemis, coloring slightly.

He noticed Holly wink sideways at Minerva.



Comments on This Post

3 responses to “B’day wishes for Artemis Fowl.” Join in!

  1. That was odd. Good, but strange. Lots of A/H, which I like. Good work! 🙂

    By the way, BATB is updated.

  2. Mastermind Excello August 15th, 2013 at 4:14 pm 2

    All the freaks on the planet? Well, that’s a large party.

  3. Heeeheee….thanks.

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