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Lost

Summary: Written for the Artemis Fowl Land “After” challenge. πŸ™‚ Hope you enjoy. MylesxMinerva, as usual. Companion to “Panic Song” (it […]

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Written for the Artemis Fowl Land “After” challenge. πŸ™‚ Hope you enjoy. MylesxMinerva, as usual. Companion to “Panic Song” (it takes place just before it). Characters are Colfer’s, songs belong to Rogue Wave and The Bangkok Five.

~*Minerva*~

A dream is a beautiful and terrible thing. It will lead you on a fantastic adventure of magic and wonder, and show your heart the greatest joy it has ever felt. But to awaken from such a wonderful dream, to be thrust from this perfect world and into the harsh reality of your life once again, is enough to break the very same heart that has just soared.

I had a dream a month ago. I had a dream that I was married to the man of my dreams, and that he felt for me the same that I felt for him. I dreamt that he cared for me, and that I had everything I ever could have wanted in my reach. It was the loveliest dream of my life, and it was real. At least, I believed it was. I was, indeed, married to a man very much resembling the man of my dreams, and he did, indeed, care for me.

But there was something wrong with me. When Artemis left me, something came loose, and my mind saw only what it wanted to see. He blames himself for lying to me, playing along, but he shouldn’t. I wanted him to. It wouldn’t have made a difference if he hadn’t. If anyone is to blame for anything here, then I’m to blame for leaving him.

Missed the last train home
Birds pass by to tell me that I’m not alone

I’m standing on the corner of First and Cardinal, waiting for the light to change. I’m on my way to an interview; I’m hoping to be hired as part of an elite research team in America. The day is cold, being late autumn, and there is a thin covering of leaves over the sidewalk. It’s funny, our old apartment is only a few blocks from here. The buildings here resemble it.

The light turns, and as I begin to cross the busy street, I feel a raindrop break on my nose, and look up. The clouds are darker now. With the luck I’ve been having lately, the skies will probably open up and pour. I sigh, digging in my pocket for my mobile.

Well, I’m pushing myself to finish this part
I can handle a lot, but one thing I’m missing…

My heart skips a beat as my fingers brush against something small and cold. I shiver unconsciously, holding it close to my palm, pressing it into my skin. It’s my heart. My broken heart that Myles repaired for me. I draw my hand from my pocket, still clutching the locket, and slip a fingernail through the clasp. It opens with a little click, just like it always has. And his picture is there, just like it always has been.

Is in your eyes, in your eyes

In this moment, something occurs to me that I don’t want to acknowledge. I made a mistake. Artemis had never cared for me; he made that quite clear. But his brother, poor little Myles… he had. And I crushed him, because I was too blind to see what I had.

A raindrop alights on the photo inside the locket, smudging the colors. I close the heart quickly, not wanting this last memory to fade away as well. I have to find him, I realize. I have to find him, and I have to make it better. I have to make it up to him. I broke him, like Artemis broke me.

I turn on my heel on a whim, clenching my fist around the locket, keeping it close. I know these streets; our apartment isn’t far from here. I can reach him before the interview, and if I miss it, so be it.

~*Myles*~

It’s raining again. I’m outside in it, this time. My face is to the sky, my arms straight, out to the sides, and the my tears are lost in the downpour. It’s refreshing, in a way, at the same time that it hurts. It’s so hopeless. Everything, now, is so pointless. I lost her, the only one I had left. I know I probably deserved it, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt.

Some strange sound rises above the tapping rain, and I look out to the corner. Someone is coming up the street, with nothing more than her clothes to shield her from the storm. As she comes closer, my heart wrenches. It can’t be her… she’d never come back, not after what I did…

But there she is, walking faster now, and calling my name through what sounds like a sob. Her normally perfect hair is plastered to her head, still as beautiful as ever. I don’t make an effort to stop the tears. She’s in front of me now, just a few feet away when she stops.

For a moment, the world stops for us one last time, as we stare into each other’s eyes, my pain mirrored by her sorrow, and then she speaks. Her words are so beautiful. She tells me she was wrong, that it is me she loves. I can only stand and listen, praying that what I’m hearing is true.

Funny now, you finally see me standing here
Funny now, I’m crying in the rain
All alone, I try to be invincible
Together now, we can be saved
Together now, we can be saved

As she pitches forward into my arms, and we embrace, something terrible nags at the back of my mind. What if it’s happened to me? I’d already seen, perfectly clearly, how a great mind can be fooled by this thing we call love. Is it real? Is she really here with me, or is it too perfect?

It’s not like it’s hard enough, now
Living in lies just to get high
The silver lining’s heavy
Falling out of the sky, out of the sky

But it has to be real. No one else has a voice like that, or a smile like that, or… no one else can come even close to comparing. I let my shoulders hitch in a sob as she pulls away gently, smiling up at me. I try to smile back, but nothing will come. There’s something wrong, somehow. I bite back the nagging feeling long enough to whisper how much I love her, and she smiles again. She’s crying, too, now, just as badly as I am.

And then she says it, and my world comes crashing down again. The magic is gone, and all I’m left with is the rain. She notices what she’s done a second too late, and the horrified expression crosses her face. But the damage is done. It doesn’t matter what she meant; it won’t ever be what I’d hoped. That memory will always be there somewhere. She loves me, and I believe her this time. But my name isn’t Artemis.

I drop her hand, and turn away. She calls something behind me, but I don’t pay attention. I can’t. I walk numbly back to the door of the apartment – our apartment, that she had chosen only for its homey quality. My apartment, now.

Funny now, the word is at your fingertips
But you can’t hold on, ’cause you have lost your grip
Head over heels, you fall into the pain again
But together now, we can be saved

Minerva stands in the driving rain outside alone, gazing after him as he walks away from her. He doesn’t understand. He doesn’t understand how much she never realized she cared. But she is beaten down, defeated. The second heartbreak in a month has her vulnerable and weak, and all she can do is stand and let the tears flow…

Funny now, you finally see me standing here
Funny now, I’m crying in the rain
All alone, I try to be invincible
Together now, we can be saved…

Not my best work, I know, but I didn’t put much effort into it XD It was written solely for the challenge, and isn’t intended to be excellent. Thanks for reading πŸ™‚

~*AA

Comments on This Post

3 responses to “Lost.” Join in!

  1. It is amazing though! Really good! It made me so sad and I could just imagine everything going perfectly. You’ve got some talent. 5/5!!

  2. Wow. All I can say.

  3. Oh my….Even the depraved spiral of insanity that is my mind must give this a 5.

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