Like Father, Like Daughter
Written on September 23rd, 2007 by artyfowl3Story Details
May 12th, 2033
Artemis hasn’t been much in the mood for writing. That’s why she hasn’t written anything in…has it only been a month? Time crawls so slowly when you’re stuck in a cold cell, even when you’re with your girlfriend. You’d think it would be a teenage boy’s dream to be alone in a room (with a bed) with his girlfriend and with almost no chance of them being…interrupted. But let me assure you “nosy diary readers”, nothing has happened. At night we don’t even sleep in the bed at the same time. We’ve been alternating turns in the bed so one of us is on the floor at night, and I have to say it hasn’t done much for my comfort. I wake up every morning with my back aching and my neck feeling as though I held it at an awkward position for hours…which I did actually. Honestly, I don’t really care if I get the bed or the floor. I can barely tell the difference between the two anyway.
I’m straying from the subject. I apologize. Artemis has tried again and again to write something, but it ends up being…well…unreadable, actually. At least in my opinion. Right now she’s pacing our cell hoping her parents were right and she has some genius buried somewhere in that “stupid, idiot, probably-nonexistent brain”, as she says. So while she’s racking her brain for a plan to get us out of here, she told me to write down everything that’s happened since she last wrote.
I have to admit, this isn’t going to be much. For someone who has the misfortune of being labeled “nerd” at school, I’m certainly not much of a writer. Even Artemis is probably better than me (no offense to her).
Okay, I’m not exactly doing what she told me to do. The reason she wants me to write this everything down is so we won’t forget it. But I honestly don’t think I’ll ever be able to forget this, so I see no reason for me to write it down. But I should probably do as she says. It’s her diary, anyway.
Let’s see…this morning the guards brought us our breakfast, which was surprising because they don’t usually feed us until noon, and again at seven o’clock in the evening. I don’t know why. The cooks must be lazy or something and don’t get up till late.
But for the breakfast we had, I don’t think cooks were required. You hear about prisoners being served stale bread and water, but we would have been lucky to get that. The guards don’t seem to know there’s two of us in here because all we got this morning was a weird looking…thing that looked somewhat like a small piece of bread. But it was sort of green and sort of mushy but crumbly at the same time, like Play-Dough that’s been sitting out too long. The small – maybe three-inch-tall – drink was a kind of dark (but transparent) yellow that resembled…um…well the point is neither Artemis nor I wanted to drink it. Who knows what it was? Maybe it was completely harmless. It could have been apple-juice. Do fairies drink apple-juice?
Artemis told me last time she was here she totally lost track of time and had no idea how long she was gone till she got back, so you’re probably wondering how I know when we get fed and what the date is. Well, let me assure you, I’m not called a “nerd” for no reason! The only way Artemis is able to tell time is by looking at the clock on her phone, which doesn’t work unless there’s a connection, but me – gloriously smart me – carries a wristwatch around with me on my…well, wrist everyday just in case my phone can’t tell the time for some reason. I know, I know, I’m a genius. Well, maybe not quite as smart as Artemis’s dad, but still.
Anyway, where was I? Oh yes, I was starting to describe exactly how horrible our life here has been. When we get out of here I’m going to go home and take a half-hour shower. I hope it will at least clean off some of the stink. The guards don’t let us out of this cell, even to take showers or wash up, so we probably stink pretty bad. On top of that, I have seen at least two dozen rats a day run back and forth through here. If you add that to all the dust and insects, you might get the idea of life here.
Artemis and I have tried everything. The first thing she did was to check all the stone slabs that make up our floor. No luck. The only thing she got out of that was a broken nail.
She also tried hitting metal pieces of the bed (yes, it comes apart into holdable pieces. That’s how cheap these fairies are) against the floor like her father said a fairy did when he imprisoned her in Fowl Manor. Apparently fairies have harder floors than us humans.
She tried bribing the guards again, but not only did they not take the money, they closed the barred window in the door so we couldn’t even offer them more.
I can’t help but wonder what my parents are thinking. I’ve probably already been reported missing. What will I say to them when I get back?
If I get back.
Whenever that will be.


(17 votes, average: 3.94 out of 5)
September 23rd, 2007 at 8:52 am
very very very good ! keep going please this is totally awsome and i love the way artemis daughter is called the same thing as him! good job!
September 23rd, 2007 at 9:58 am
that is soooooooooo good. origonal. new. fresh. YAY♣♦◘♣
September 23rd, 2007 at 5:00 pm
Oh, I really like this, I think you’ve got a really great idea for a character, I think. Constructive criticism: This would be a great first chapter to a story, but I don’t think it’s that great as a story in itself. I’m not sure how to describe it, but it doesn’t seem… self-contained.
September 23rd, 2007 at 5:14 pm
ok, thanks! so i should write a little more? sure, no problem. Thank you for telling me!:)
September 23rd, 2007 at 6:31 pm
the only adult kids can trust is Santa Claus but how can we trust him if we never met him.(1st comment dance for Vinyaya)oooooh she forgot!!!! I love it!! I read a little then I couldnt stop reading.my friend got a little mad because we were IMing and I didnt answer her;)=D
September 23rd, 2007 at 9:27 pm
lol, that was really good!! i love the relaxed air of the story, and thats exactly how i talk!! artemis fowl III is obviously a girl, right =lol=. that sounded really stupid.
but i do agree with MMK, you should realy write more!!!
September 24th, 2007 at 3:52 am
1crazyhollyfan:thats how me and everyone at my school talks.but with more pizzaz.a strange pizzaz though.
September 25th, 2007 at 8:14 pm
I’m really glad you continued!
I still love her as a character, this should be really great.
September 27th, 2007 at 4:23 am
nvm,nobody I know speak valley girl exept this one girl.but she speaks it for fun.I am soo glad you added and I’d really like this story continued.and I bet a lot of other kids want it continued too!!!!!
September 28th, 2007 at 2:29 am
Nananananananana Batman!!
Ok now that that is out of my system II am here to warn you that m brothers hairy but is going to squash the earth if you don’t keep writing!!
Oh ya and if you add something like Almonds raining from the sky you can categorize this in FUNNY!!
September 30th, 2007 at 6:21 am
eek! write more! i beg of u! i dont want to get a hairy but to squash me!!!!!!hee hee
October 16th, 2007 at 1:04 am
come on add more!
October 23rd, 2007 at 9:12 am
mwa mwa mwa mwa u added more….YAY wonderful
October 23rd, 2007 at 8:33 pm
I just read chapter three. It’s still very good.
I can’t wait for her to figure out her father’s right (that will happen, right? Nevermind, don’t tell me).
October 26th, 2007 at 3:07 am
That was hilarious!!!! Can’t *giggle* stop *snort* LAUGHING! Very awesome.
October 26th, 2007 at 5:16 am
OMG Artemis’s daughter is starting to freak me out! PLEASE! WHY is she so EVIL?
October 27th, 2007 at 12:57 pm
This rocks!! does she find out about the fairies though? plz let her, it would make her feel better!!
;) xoxox
October 28th, 2007 at 6:09 pm
no offense but this story doesn’t really have a point.
More action would make it better!
October 30th, 2007 at 5:59 am
don’t worry! i’m just building up to it!
November 1st, 2007 at 2:30 am
Ok sounds good!
November 2nd, 2007 at 7:54 am
l.o.v.e it
November 3rd, 2007 at 2:58 pm
love it! wow its awesome!
November 3rd, 2007 at 10:48 pm
wow,this is totally cool!!!!!!!
November 3rd, 2007 at 11:04 pm
ditto!
November 4th, 2007 at 12:36 pm
this may be a bit off subject..i dunno…..BUT I LUV THE WORD DITTO!
November 4th, 2007 at 9:36 pm
lol , thank god u updated keep it up!
November 5th, 2007 at 1:06 am
yay u updated…..new bodyguards hmmmmmmm great idea
November 8th, 2007 at 4:25 pm
ooo the toothfiary!!!!!!!!!
I really needed a quarter are you shure she’s coming???????lol this is good!!!!!
November 23rd, 2007 at 7:45 pm
wow. i just read ch.8! i really like your ideas! write more soon!
November 25th, 2007 at 1:55 am
Wow, it’s pretty original! I’m not quite sure if I like who Artemis III is, but we’ll see. Generally, when people are like her, they don’t care that much about social status anymore. I think that whole rant gets kind of old. It is quite addictive, though. keep it up!!
November 25th, 2007 at 2:11 am
i loved that u continued! keep it up!!!
November 25th, 2007 at 2:26 am
you you lied !!! she didn’t come and I still need a quarter!!! great story glad to see it contuned but that God comment was offenceve everyone belives in something!!! please keep going only don’t lie!!! stupid toothfairy!!
November 25th, 2007 at 3:22 am
yes most definatly! I agree with Carino Artemis 3 is um a little bit no, A LOT rude and well kind of now this is just my point of view a little bit on the gangster side. she scares me! *goes to hide under kitchen table* If u could soften her up a wee bit that would be wounderful!
p.s. I can’t hold it in any longer! I WAS ON TV!!!!!
YAAAAAAAAAA!
November 25th, 2007 at 3:35 am
you were on t.v ??? coooll!! which cannel? where? tell meee!!!
November 25th, 2007 at 4:41 am
idk what channel it is on your TV but it was 34 on mine. That is the school public channel and I got to sing a solo for the school board!
November 25th, 2007 at 7:54 am
you were on tv? cool. please continue soon!
November 25th, 2007 at 4:14 pm
yeah.. in austrialia! idt we have that.. ah welll……… plz continue this story soon@
December 6th, 2007 at 6:49 am
I just read chapters 7 - 14. Very good still.
Though I’m starting to wish for more fairy-related plot. Not just the romance, though that’s nice too (just be careful not to overdo it)
December 6th, 2007 at 11:55 pm
nice , I totally like it! plz continue ,
December 7th, 2007 at 12:10 am
kool update!
December 8th, 2007 at 5:24 pm
MMK, you don’t have to be worried about me overdoing the romance. i’m not a romantic type of person. there’ll only be a little and there WILL be more fairy related stuff soon. thanks for reviewing!
December 8th, 2007 at 6:26 pm
Yes! More fairies! I really like it! continue!
December 20th, 2007 at 2:27 pm
I would like to see a continuation of the topic
December 31st, 2007 at 8:52 am
please continue! this is fabulose…(if thats how u spell the word)
January 27th, 2008 at 9:08 pm
r u going to upd8 this any more?
February 6th, 2008 at 4:36 am
Nice update, but I must say, I’m getting impatient to actually see fairies… assuming we get to. Artemis III’s school life is nice and everything, but it doesn’t interest me as much.
February 6th, 2008 at 5:15 am
u’ll see it! it’s coming up in the…next chapter or so? she learns a lot more about fairies. it doesn’t seem to have a point yet. i think i kind of got carried away with her normal life. oops.
February 6th, 2008 at 6:31 am
i like the school life parts. most good stories dont rush into it quickly so yea. luv the update!
February 10th, 2008 at 10:46 pm
Yeah, I’m not too impatient without the fairies. But please continue! I love the story!
February 15th, 2008 at 7:52 am
luv the update,….HAHAHAHA she got locked in a boot.
February 21st, 2008 at 5:21 am
omg.. wow.. well keep updating , I was kind of like “What the—–” when she got drunk and evrythig.. but w/e , upd8 soon lol!
February 21st, 2008 at 8:51 am
ohhh a coma,..great idea
March 6th, 2008 at 4:07 am
I like her getting drunk! Serve her right for thinking Opal is just a poor innocent fairy. ~shake fist~
March 9th, 2008 at 10:29 pm
LOL I like it!
March 9th, 2008 at 10:51 pm
Yay! Love it still! Get her out of there! Yay! Update soon!
March 11th, 2008 at 12:50 am
yay update!!!!!
March 19th, 2008 at 5:50 am
lol like the update
March 19th, 2008 at 9:26 pm
Dun dun dunnnnnnnn. Love it! Write more!
March 31st, 2008 at 8:12 am
lol if i was jo i would be like…o..m…g…..TURTLES!! just to make the moment random. luv the update plz continue.
March 31st, 2008 at 6:47 pm
hm…that’s an idea…
March 31st, 2008 at 10:57 pm
Good to see you’re updating again! I’m glad the plot moved (not to rush you, of course- it’s your story, do what YOU like). It’s very interesting, I like your plot.
Though I’m guessing Artemis was mesmerized in the cell? If not then he was very OOC, completely giving up right away like that. Holly was OOC, too. Your original characters are great, but you have to be careful to keep the old ones in character. That’s my major piece of constuctive criticism.
Great job, though!
April 1st, 2008 at 12:19 am
thanks! i’ll try to make them a bit more in character. as i keep saying, i LOVE constructive criticism.
April 1st, 2008 at 2:32 am
I like it! Yeah! cool character, but some constuctive critisism would be: you need to start a new paragraph everytime someone else starts speaking, like:
“Hi Joe,” Bob said.
“Hi Bob, we’re all going to get killed by aliens!” replied Joe.
You get the picture, but other then that it’s good.
May 16th, 2008 at 10:22 pm
That was AWSOME!!!!! UPDATE PLEASE!!!!!