Like Father, Like Daughter
Written on September 23rd, 2007 by artyfowl3Story Details
(17 votes, average: 3.94 out of 5)
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Oh my god, I haven’t written in SO LONG! You’ll have to excuse me because there’s a lot of stuff that has been happening recently. How about…my comatose father being kidnapped by an evil pixie with a demented mind? Apparently, this pixie has some human friends and she used them to get inside the hospital and throw my dad, secured in a big bag, out the window to the awaiting pixie in a pickup truck.
I had been just leaving the hospital when I saw a bag fly out the window and land in the back of a pickup truck. Luckily it was tossed out a window on the second floor and it was caught by some more people in the truck so I don’t think dad got hurt. Now you’re probably wondering how I knew it was my dad. Answer: I didn’t.
The guys saw me watching and they kidnapped me too. I guess they didn’t want anyone seeing them steal someone from the hospital. They gagged and blindfolded me and tied me up and threw me into the truck along with my dad. Now this electronic diary is dented and it’s all. That. Wacky. Pixie’s. Fault. I’M GONNA KILL HER!
When they took the blindfold off a few days ago, I was sitting in the tiny cold cell I’m in now and dad was all like, “What the hell are you doing here, Artemis?” Of course, he didn’t say that, because dad never swears, even if it’s as mild as ‘hell’. It was more of a demand than a question, but being my dad, that’s normal. He doesn’t ask questions. He already knows everything. Well, when he does ask a question or two, it’s probably only because he’s mocking you, and he already knows the answer. Typical dad.
I answered by saying, “To be honest, I don’t know what the hell I’m doing here either.” And he started lecturing me about how he warned me to stay out of trouble and leave this whole fairy thing to him and mom and how I never listen.
I know what you’re thinking. “How is her dad awake when he’s been in a coma for the past few days?” Well, remember when I asked Holly to go into the hospital and heal him or something? That’s probably what this pixie person did, because here he is sitting in this cell with that blank expression on his face he gets when he’s thinking too hard. I have no idea how anyone can think that hard. My head would probably explode and dad would get mad at me for getting brains on his new suit.
Oh my god, I am so hungry. I never thought I’d feel this hungry ever, seeing as my dad’s a millionaire and I’ve lived in a mansion with servants and bodyguards and all that crap all my life. But here I am, clutching my stomach in agony while I wait for someone to slide some stale bread and water through a hole in the door. Yeah, that’s what we’ve been living on for the past, what, week. Stale bread and water. Two pieces each for every meal of the day and one glass of water for us to share. And it’s not a big glass either. It’s just one of those tiny plastic cups that I used when I was five. Hell, it’s not even a glass! It’s plastic like stuff that tastes like dust. Now I know why dad got me bodyguards and now I don’t know why I didn’t have them with me 24/7 (except when I’m the bathroom. That’d be just plain wrong).
To tell you the truth, I don’t even know what this pixie person looks like. I keep imagining a tiny, two inch tall sparkly fairy with transparent wings that looks an awful lot like Tinkerbell. It doesn’t really fit the evil, crazy, revengeful person she’s supposed to be, but whatever. I like to think of Tinkerbell. Have you ever seen that movie? My favorite part is when Peter Pan, like, disowns her. I’ve found it funny ever since I was three. But I keep wishing that Wendy chick actually did fall onto those rocks and impale herself. I know, I know. I’m morbid.
Anyway, I’m not here to write about corny movies that make the original book look bad. I kind of got off topic, what with all the Tinkerbell-equals-crazy, evil pixie stuff that I was talking about.
I am FREEZING. It’s, like, the north pole here. Where the hell are we anyway. Hell if I know. I once heard a girl at school say (it was a very rainy day) “Damn, it’s cold as hell out here” and I couldn’t help saying “Isn’t hell supposed to be hot? Dude, you make no sense.” Then she flipped me off and I got suspended for breaking her nose. I was like, “It’s not my fault she makes up crappy metaphors!”
Now I’m wishing I at least brought a jacket with me when I got brutally kidnapped by crazy fairies. Though it wouldn’t hurt if I’d brought, I don’t know, a parka and those super warm boots some weird girls wear even when it’s ‘hot as hell’ (there, girl who makes up sucky metaphors! Maybe you could learn something).
God, I wish Joseph were here. I need someone to snuggle with to keep me warm here. Why don’t fairies use the damn air heater thingy? What do they think it’s for? Decoration? I guess I’ll just take a nap or something. Jeez, I don’t even know the time of day!
September 23rd, 2007 at 8:52 am
very very very good ! keep going please this is totally awsome and i love the way artemis daughter is called the same thing as him! good job!
September 23rd, 2007 at 9:58 am
that is soooooooooo good. origonal. new. fresh. YAY♣♦◘♣
September 23rd, 2007 at 5:00 pm
Oh, I really like this, I think you’ve got a really great idea for a character, I think. Constructive criticism: This would be a great first chapter to a story, but I don’t think it’s that great as a story in itself. I’m not sure how to describe it, but it doesn’t seem… self-contained.
September 23rd, 2007 at 5:14 pm
ok, thanks! so i should write a little more? sure, no problem. Thank you for telling me!:)
September 23rd, 2007 at 6:31 pm
the only adult kids can trust is Santa Claus but how can we trust him if we never met him.(1st comment dance for Vinyaya)oooooh she forgot!!!! I love it!! I read a little then I couldnt stop reading.my friend got a little mad because we were IMing and I didnt answer her;)=D
September 23rd, 2007 at 9:27 pm
lol, that was really good!! i love the relaxed air of the story, and thats exactly how i talk!! artemis fowl III is obviously a girl, right =lol=. that sounded really stupid.
but i do agree with MMK, you should realy write more!!!
September 24th, 2007 at 3:52 am
1crazyhollyfan:thats how me and everyone at my school talks.but with more pizzaz.a strange pizzaz though.
September 25th, 2007 at 8:14 pm
I’m really glad you continued!
I still love her as a character, this should be really great.
September 27th, 2007 at 4:23 am
nvm,nobody I know speak valley girl exept this one girl.but she speaks it for fun.I am soo glad you added and I’d really like this story continued.and I bet a lot of other kids want it continued too!!!!!
September 28th, 2007 at 2:29 am
Nananananananana Batman!!
Ok now that that is out of my system II am here to warn you that m brothers hairy but is going to squash the earth if you don’t keep writing!!
Oh ya and if you add something like Almonds raining from the sky you can categorize this in FUNNY!!
September 30th, 2007 at 6:21 am
eek! write more! i beg of u! i dont want to get a hairy but to squash me!!!!!!hee hee
October 16th, 2007 at 1:04 am
come on add more!
October 23rd, 2007 at 9:12 am
mwa mwa mwa mwa u added more….YAY wonderful
October 23rd, 2007 at 8:33 pm
I just read chapter three. It’s still very good.
I can’t wait for her to figure out her father’s right (that will happen, right? Nevermind, don’t tell me).
October 26th, 2007 at 3:07 am
That was hilarious!!!! Can’t *giggle* stop *snort* LAUGHING! Very awesome.
October 26th, 2007 at 5:16 am
OMG Artemis’s daughter is starting to freak me out! PLEASE! WHY is she so EVIL?
October 27th, 2007 at 12:57 pm
This rocks!! does she find out about the fairies though? plz let her, it would make her feel better!!
;) xoxox
October 28th, 2007 at 6:09 pm
no offense but this story doesn’t really have a point.
More action would make it better!
October 30th, 2007 at 5:59 am
don’t worry! i’m just building up to it!
November 1st, 2007 at 2:30 am
Ok sounds good!
November 2nd, 2007 at 7:54 am
l.o.v.e it
November 3rd, 2007 at 2:58 pm
love it! wow its awesome!
November 3rd, 2007 at 10:48 pm
wow,this is totally cool!!!!!!!
November 3rd, 2007 at 11:04 pm
ditto!
November 4th, 2007 at 12:36 pm
this may be a bit off subject..i dunno…..BUT I LUV THE WORD DITTO!
November 4th, 2007 at 9:36 pm
lol , thank god u updated keep it up!
November 5th, 2007 at 1:06 am
yay u updated…..new bodyguards hmmmmmmm great idea
November 8th, 2007 at 4:25 pm
ooo the toothfiary!!!!!!!!!
I really needed a quarter are you shure she’s coming???????lol this is good!!!!!
November 23rd, 2007 at 7:45 pm
wow. i just read ch.8! i really like your ideas! write more soon!
November 25th, 2007 at 1:55 am
Wow, it’s pretty original! I’m not quite sure if I like who Artemis III is, but we’ll see. Generally, when people are like her, they don’t care that much about social status anymore. I think that whole rant gets kind of old. It is quite addictive, though. keep it up!!
November 25th, 2007 at 2:11 am
i loved that u continued! keep it up!!!
November 25th, 2007 at 2:26 am
you you lied !!! she didn’t come and I still need a quarter!!! great story glad to see it contuned but that God comment was offenceve everyone belives in something!!! please keep going only don’t lie!!! stupid toothfairy!!
November 25th, 2007 at 3:22 am
yes most definatly! I agree with Carino Artemis 3 is um a little bit no, A LOT rude and well kind of now this is just my point of view a little bit on the gangster side. she scares me! *goes to hide under kitchen table* If u could soften her up a wee bit that would be wounderful!
p.s. I can’t hold it in any longer! I WAS ON TV!!!!!
YAAAAAAAAAA!
November 25th, 2007 at 3:35 am
you were on t.v ??? coooll!! which cannel? where? tell meee!!!
November 25th, 2007 at 4:41 am
idk what channel it is on your TV but it was 34 on mine. That is the school public channel and I got to sing a solo for the school board!
November 25th, 2007 at 7:54 am
you were on tv? cool. please continue soon!
November 25th, 2007 at 4:14 pm
yeah.. in austrialia! idt we have that.. ah welll……… plz continue this story soon@
December 6th, 2007 at 6:49 am
I just read chapters 7 - 14. Very good still.
Though I’m starting to wish for more fairy-related plot. Not just the romance, though that’s nice too (just be careful not to overdo it)
December 6th, 2007 at 11:55 pm
nice , I totally like it! plz continue ,
December 7th, 2007 at 12:10 am
kool update!
December 8th, 2007 at 5:24 pm
MMK, you don’t have to be worried about me overdoing the romance. i’m not a romantic type of person. there’ll only be a little and there WILL be more fairy related stuff soon. thanks for reviewing!
December 8th, 2007 at 6:26 pm
Yes! More fairies! I really like it! continue!
December 20th, 2007 at 2:27 pm
I would like to see a continuation of the topic
December 31st, 2007 at 8:52 am
please continue! this is fabulose…(if thats how u spell the word)
January 27th, 2008 at 9:08 pm
r u going to upd8 this any more?
February 6th, 2008 at 4:36 am
Nice update, but I must say, I’m getting impatient to actually see fairies… assuming we get to. Artemis III’s school life is nice and everything, but it doesn’t interest me as much.
February 6th, 2008 at 5:15 am
u’ll see it! it’s coming up in the…next chapter or so? she learns a lot more about fairies. it doesn’t seem to have a point yet. i think i kind of got carried away with her normal life. oops.
February 6th, 2008 at 6:31 am
i like the school life parts. most good stories dont rush into it quickly so yea. luv the update!
February 10th, 2008 at 10:46 pm
Yeah, I’m not too impatient without the fairies. But please continue! I love the story!
February 15th, 2008 at 7:52 am
luv the update,….HAHAHAHA she got locked in a boot.
February 21st, 2008 at 5:21 am
omg.. wow.. well keep updating , I was kind of like “What the—–” when she got drunk and evrythig.. but w/e , upd8 soon lol!
February 21st, 2008 at 8:51 am
ohhh a coma,..great idea
March 6th, 2008 at 4:07 am
I like her getting drunk! Serve her right for thinking Opal is just a poor innocent fairy. ~shake fist~
March 9th, 2008 at 10:29 pm
LOL I like it!
March 9th, 2008 at 10:51 pm
Yay! Love it still! Get her out of there! Yay! Update soon!
March 11th, 2008 at 12:50 am
yay update!!!!!
March 19th, 2008 at 5:50 am
lol like the update
March 19th, 2008 at 9:26 pm
Dun dun dunnnnnnnn. Love it! Write more!
March 31st, 2008 at 8:12 am
lol if i was jo i would be like…o..m…g…..TURTLES!! just to make the moment random. luv the update plz continue.
March 31st, 2008 at 6:47 pm
hm…that’s an idea…
March 31st, 2008 at 10:57 pm
Good to see you’re updating again! I’m glad the plot moved (not to rush you, of course- it’s your story, do what YOU like). It’s very interesting, I like your plot.
Though I’m guessing Artemis was mesmerized in the cell? If not then he was very OOC, completely giving up right away like that. Holly was OOC, too. Your original characters are great, but you have to be careful to keep the old ones in character. That’s my major piece of constuctive criticism.
Great job, though!
April 1st, 2008 at 12:19 am
thanks! i’ll try to make them a bit more in character. as i keep saying, i LOVE constructive criticism.
April 1st, 2008 at 2:32 am
I like it! Yeah! cool character, but some constuctive critisism would be: you need to start a new paragraph everytime someone else starts speaking, like:
“Hi Joe,” Bob said.
“Hi Bob, we’re all going to get killed by aliens!” replied Joe.
You get the picture, but other then that it’s good.
May 16th, 2008 at 10:22 pm
That was AWSOME!!!!! UPDATE PLEASE!!!!!