Artemis Fowl and the Mallan Rebellion
Written on June 27th, 2008 by geniustkwStory Details
(7 votes, average: 3.71 out of 5)
Loading ...Chapter 4: Foaling For Foaly
FOALY’S HOUSE, HAVEN, THE LOWER ELEMENTS
Mr. Foaling, the centaur who just spoke with Mallan was a smart centaur with a lot of devious plans up his sleeve but he is in many ways inferior to the genius Foaly, in terms of technological knowledge, Patents, Foaly always was superior but in terms of devious plans, and ruthlessness, Mr.Foaling is always the top for this, and this was another reason why Mallan recruited him as one of his assistants, Mallan wanted to use Foaling’s technical expertise, and devious plans and ideas to destroy the LEP, and the technical expert was also a famous hacker, known to have battled with Foaly over the LEP Files. But Foaly always won the matches but that was history.
Mr.Foaling was with Jessica Blum, and D’Argen the Goblin, all three have a lot in common, Jessica Blum was a chemistry teacher, and hypnotist whose best friend during university was none other than Opal Koboi, and both remained in contact even when Opal is still in jail, so to be exact, Opal Koboi is also in cahoots with Mallan’s Gang. D’Argen the goblin was B’wa Kell General Scalene’s son, not one of the 1000 nephews there, D’Argen would have been a B’wa Kell Triad member, but no, he wasn’t, not until his father’s untimely death which caused him a lot of grief, he decided to join the triad and also Mallan’s gang when he heard Mallan was to destroy the LEP though he was rather wary of him like as if he was Briar Cudgeon.
Now the trio were outside the house of Foaly, Foaly was just resting at his sofa, reeling from the flu he had a few weeks ago
Foaly who knew that his flu could get more serious, thought of a deviously clever plan to prevent hackers from hacking into LEP Files, especially Artemis Fowl. But for now he’s lying down on his bed. The doorbell ringed, Foaly opened the door to find Corporal Kelp outside his doorstep. Foaly would have thought that Grub Kelp just wanted to have a conversation with him. What Foaly or even Grub himself didn’t know was that Grub Kelp was now under Mallan’s control.
After that drunkard incident, Grub Kelp found himself getting a bit more stranger and stranger. Somehow the words from his mouth didn’t seem to come from him, the actions that he did were not what he had intended. Grub Kelp was supposed to do duty at this time but his legs took him to the house of Foaly.
Grub wanted a cup of tea as a drink, indeed he was thirsty, out of a sudden, he went in to Foaly’s kitchen and grew more and more angry, he became like the Fairy version of the incredible hulk, but for the wrong cause. Grub began to strangle Foaly, Foaly would never have expected such a ferocious attack coming from the weakling Grub Kelp. But now what Foaly could muster was just a sentence: “GRUB! WHA.. ARE U DO..ING?!”
Three other unexpected visitors barged into Foaly’s house and rushed into the kitchen, Mr. Foaling laughed and kicked the struggling Foaly a few times, “Now! I’ve beaten you.” Before letting Jessica Blum, the femme fatale uses a syringe filled of a mixture of drugs shot into the now screaming Foaly’s body and along with Grub and company took him to Mallan’s House before D’Argen the goblin and a few other triad members giving Foaly’s house a nice fire to burn.
HAVEN, THE LOWER ELEMENTS
Lieutenant Holly Short’s eyelids just kept flickering non-stop, she knew that her eyelids flickering was a bad omen of a bad disaster to arrive, she was just patrolling around the areas of Haven, with Chix Verbil, the admirer of hers, and a few other officers. She suddenly heard a scream from somewhere, though she was quite alarmed, but somehow she thought there was nothing wrong. But Complacency never helps the situation, as Commander Root always pointed out, and Holly with her whole team followed the direction of the sound to see if there was anything wrong.
Obviously, something was real wrong, there was a house burning in flames, she and her officers immediately began to put out the ferocious flame, but the flame threw itself on the LEP squad, and other houses. Holly immediately called upon a team of fire-fighters to help out. The fire threw itself on each and every of its LEP officers, most managed to dodge, but some failed and found themselves like burnt charcoal.
Holly knew this was magic fire and only a few fairies could manage this, she managed to see among the fire, a tall shadow of a elf, who had long hair, just as Holly wanted to shoot at her, the flame charged towards her direction, Holly managed to escape from the flame, but the fire was just getting more and more serious, until the squad of fire-fighters and warlocks managed to put outthe magic fire.
Just as the fire was put out, to her horror Holly Short, found out that the fire came from Foaly’s house, she immediately went into the burnt house and found no centaur’s body, but it was true that a magic fire would cremate anybody, so Foaly might have well been long dead, Holly just got more and more worried about Foaly, and after a search on all the victims of the fire, whether anyone was alive and escaped being cremated by the magic fire, there were no survivors, and for the LEP squad, more than half were also dead, tears began to flow from Holly Short, and somehow things were going from bad to worse.
Some other stories by geniustkw:
- Artemis Fowl and the Frond Trophy Chapter 3 is out!
- Artemis Fowl and the Frond Trophy (Sneak Preview)
- Artemis Fowl and the Mallan Rebellion ending soon! (Sequel coming up!)
- Updates (geniustkw- AF and the Mallan Rebellion)
June 28th, 2008 at 4:40 am
Hi, I’m a teenager AF Fan from Singapore, just writing this for fun, but please give me comments.
June 29th, 2008 at 1:51 pm
Can anybody just give me a review? Chapter 3 added, Thanks!
geniustkw
July 2nd, 2008 at 10:19 pm
Wow! it’s good! you should keep going with the plot. now, is commander root dead, like in the opal deception, or just on vaction?
and thanks 4 the comments on my story!
July 3rd, 2008 at 3:23 am
You got a dictionary and thesaurus in your head! Can you please change some of the words please. I can’t understad.
July 3rd, 2008 at 8:52 am
Thanks a lot, everybody, yah I will try simplifying the words, and for commander root, he would be back in the plot and would play a very crucial character in the story, I’m now working on chapter 10, this story might be very long..
But continue to leave your comments, Thanks!
geniustkw (http://jiayanyixing94.blogspot.com)
July 4th, 2008 at 9:32 pm
the next chapter is great! i like the 100 questions thing
no offense to bentj96, but the big “juicy” words are the best part
that’s what makes a story good
July 4th, 2008 at 9:34 pm
oh, and please comment on my story
i changed it so the charachters are less ooc
thanks!
ps: are you chinese? I am
July 7th, 2008 at 12:36 pm
WOW!that was really good! you should be an Author one day! Maybe you could change all the names and stuff and publish it! it’s just Like the AF books!Write more!
P.S. thank you for the review you gave me!
July 7th, 2008 at 2:37 pm
(computerzandbks4ever), I am a chinese, singaporean chinese. I commented on your story, continue with yours, (Captain Short 711), Thanks for the compliment, Yah, Since I read AF Books, I have been so heavily influenced by Colfer’s writing, I like how he writes it, and now I’m doing chapter 11. Once again,to both of you, Thanks a lot!
geniustkw
July 7th, 2008 at 11:00 pm
neat! i can never find another chinese person, and now its nice to know that im not alone
I will continue with my story, but updates will be slow. (and i mean, paragraph by paragraph)
and thanks a lot to you!
July 8th, 2008 at 10:16 am
As the song goes, you’ll never walk alone… By the way, are you Singaporean?
July 8th, 2008 at 2:25 pm
Anyway, added chapters 7 and 8, hope you enjoy it and please give me more comments and reviews, thanks!
geniustkw
July 8th, 2008 at 2:33 pm
that was pretty good.
keep up the good work
July 8th, 2008 at 3:08 pm
You’re from Sing!?! ME TOO!!
Which part?
And your story was nice, keep the work up!
:)
( faster tell me which part! )
July 8th, 2008 at 11:34 pm
I LOVE your story!
July 9th, 2008 at 10:48 am
(arty_and_holly_4ever, Shanette, AF Rules) Thanks for your compliments and appreciation for the story, will continue this. (Shanette, I stay in North-East, Serangoon North, what about you?)
July 10th, 2008 at 12:41 pm
Totally amazing story. I wish I could write that good.
July 10th, 2008 at 2:19 pm
(Sean09) Thanks for the compliment, anybody can write good stuff like this,
Anyway for all readers, my progress will be quite slow as I have to write script for my school, for its national day celebration, disgustingly 45 minutes, I will be damn tired, so less of AF but don’t fret, work will resume and I’ve completed a few chapters already, so continue to give your comments.
geniustkw
July 10th, 2008 at 2:28 pm
Chapter 9’s in, Commander Julius Root’s returned!
geniustkw
July 10th, 2008 at 2:34 pm
Ahh, Serangoon. I’m pure north. Woodlands. I can see JB from here.
Ohh Root’s back! Can’t wait for more!
July 10th, 2008 at 6:13 pm
Please read my story “Youngest of the Fowl Line” I need more opinions peeps!
July 10th, 2008 at 7:22 pm
i’m not Singaporean. i dont know.
i was adopted when i was 2, so i have no idea.
im from Xi’an province, according to the agency i came from.
July 10th, 2008 at 7:23 pm
(i live in the US)
July 11th, 2008 at 8:35 pm
My my, you are a genius after all. It’s going to take some time to get through your story, but you have me gripped. I’m not quite finished, far from it in fact but still I am going to read. Your skill as a writer is as impressive as your vocabulary perhaps even more so. I’ll happily continue reading your story and when I finish I’ll give you the full review. It’s great so far and I’m confident that I won’t be disappointed. Brilliant.
~Jade Malice
July 12th, 2008 at 8:07 am
(Jade Malice) Thanks a lot. (computerzandbks4ever) It doesn’t matter, we are all chinese.
Everyone, Chapter 10’s added, finished my National Day script for my school, enjoy!
July 12th, 2008 at 1:36 pm
Wow! So far I have only read the first chapter, but I’m already glued to the story.
July 12th, 2008 at 1:42 pm
Any other people here Australian?
July 12th, 2008 at 5:17 pm
(ltnyle375) Thank you! Chapter 11 added, whole story would be finished by chapter 13, a shocking plot twist awaits…
July 14th, 2008 at 2:47 pm
Can anybody please continue to give me comments, I will be posting chapter 13 real soon….
July 15th, 2008 at 2:58 pm
Wow, you’re seriously PRO. Can’t wait for more!! I really love it!!
July 16th, 2008 at 1:47 pm
The whole story has completed already, so anyone is surprised about the plot twist?
geniustkw
July 17th, 2008 at 10:25 am
Not bad, but you should lay off the really long sentences. You’re overdosing on commas. Also; parts of the tenses were mangled, and the way that you phrased some sentences distorts its true meaning.
In chapter 2, Atlantis is spelled wrongly. Some of the punctuation you used aren’t that suitable too.
Try not to use the word ‘quipped’ too much. It gets old.
It’s bad form to start a sentence with a conjuncture.
Almost everything seems rushed.
Sorry to say this, but the plot is rather shallow and a little too contrived.
A little too many troupes too. Cliche after cliche.
You might want to consider proofreading before posting; quite a few typos.
Quite decent though, so keep it up.
July 18th, 2008 at 1:53 pm
(Jonathan) Thanks, you could be my editor if you wish!
Anyone have any other comments?
July 19th, 2008 at 11:09 am
Well, me.
I just loved your story. Your vocabulary is super.
Not being nosey, but which school are you from?
-grins-
July 19th, 2008 at 2:15 pm
Maris Stella High School. What about you? Keep the comments coming!
geniustkw
July 19th, 2008 at 11:25 pm
i agree with jonathan
it’s a really good plot, but the sentences are a bit long, so it’s a little hard to understand.
(jonathan) could you rr&r my stories?
i would LOVE some REAL criteria!
(
these are the titles)
Artemis and Minerva
Oh, Sorry. Is that the wrong question?
The mind wipe that failed
July 20th, 2008 at 4:51 am
Wahow!!! Awesome story with all the complicated writing of a sci-fi movie script!!! (to LtNyle375) I’m an Aussie too.
Can anybody review my stories?
Fairy: 2435
Determin Fomorian: The last Fomorian
Root 4 centuries ago
and World falls on collision course!!! (buckle your seatbelts)!!!
July 20th, 2008 at 8:41 am
Maris stella? Nice!
I’m from NUS high school.
New school. I doubt you heard of it.
It’s a math and science school. They completely torture us with all the 3 sciences.
And I am waiting for the sequel!!
July 21st, 2008 at 2:38 pm
（TroubleKelp) Thanks for the comment,by the way is there any other AF fanfic authors here besides Aussie, Singaporean, american, I wonder. Anyway please visit my blog, Thanks! (Shanette) Yes I am from maris stella high, and I am familiar with NUS high, your principal went to my primary school, (Rosyth, btw). The sequel’s coming soon, just glue to my blog for the time being
July 21st, 2008 at 2:39 pm
Mmkay! I’ll keep waiting!
July 21st, 2008 at 9:54 pm
what’s the sequel called?
July 22nd, 2008 at 11:18 am
(Shanette) First Chapter’s out in my blog, (computerzandbks4ever) Artemis Fowl and the Frond Trophy.
July 22nd, 2008 at 5:05 pm
i really really liked your story. it was very in character, and the length is awesome. I cant wait for the sequal!
July 24th, 2008 at 2:03 pm
First chapter’s out? Sweet!
I’ll check it out.
( Sorry not now, I’ve to switch the computer off ).
But I will see it.
July 27th, 2008 at 10:26 am
I deleted World on Collision Course. It was an already-done idea.
(That award winning story called What if Opal’s second plan worked?: My story was parallel to it. So I deleted mine).
I’m up to chapter 6 I haven’t been reading it lately (cos I’ve been updating).
I really don’t know if it’s just me, but I’m finding some bits hard to follow.
But I still love the story!
You should see my story.
Fairy: 2435
The action comes in the later chapters.
I devoted the first few to the plot building.
(Aaaaargh! I’m spoiling my own story!)
I’d like to see what you think of it, n e wayz.
Keep up all the great work! (not necessarily on this story, since you’ve finished it)
This is TroubleKelp, signin’ out!
*long comment dance*