He slapped me!
“You slapped me! You self-centred monster!”
“You punched me!”
“You kissed me!”
“Yes, that’s generally what fiance’s do.”
“But I don’t want to be your fiance! I never wanted to marry you, and you’re forcing me into it!”
My brilliant sister took that as her cue to come up.
“Do you know how much pain you have put my sister through you self centered b****rd! She doesn’t love you, and she never will! You are so vain you think any woman could just look at you and instantly fall in love! But in truth you smell like pee, you look like the wrong end of a dog, and my sister will never, ever want to be your wife! So just p*** off and leave my family alone!”
“Wow. You definitely are her twin.”
Polly, my twin, linked my arm and lead me angrily out of the chapel.