A Tale of Betrayal and Randomness

Summary: My most popular story, and the one I have the most fun writing. I'm amazed you're reading this, actually. Hi. Read my story, please? *innocent smile*

  • Story Complete? Not yet.
  • Author:
  • Category: Funny
  • Word Count: 10198
38 votes, average: 4.89 out of 538 votes, average: 4.89 out of 538 votes, average: 4.89 out of 538 votes, average: 4.89 out of 538 votes, average: 4.89 out of 5 (38 votes, average: 4.89 out of 5)
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Reading Mode

I apologize to anyone attempting to read this story. Something is stopping me from separating all the chapters and bolding the names, so all the formatting is out the window.
Yoshi: *sitting on my bed bored out of my mind*

Artemis: *appears out of thin air*

Yoshi: Ahhhhh! I’d know that complexion anywhere! It’s the infamous ARTEMIS FOWL!!!! *stares*

Artemis: Wait… How do you know my name? And my complexion?

Yoshi: Somebody must’ve leaked your story, because now it’s a book series!!!

Artemis: Great. I’ll have to remember to strangle Foaly when I get the chance.

Yoshi: AHHH! Foaly is real too!

Artemis: Of course. You think I could have all my escapades without him?

Yoshi: Is Minerva real too?

Artemis: *rolls eyes* Of course.

Yoshi: Then TAKE ME TO HER!!!! I wanna meet her!!!!

Artemis: You like her that much?

Yoshi: Ehehehehe… Not exactly.

Artemis: Hmmmm…. Well, at any rate, you’re about to meet her regardless. She’s coming through the dimensional tunnel.

Minerva:*Appears out of thin air*

Ninja: *jumps through window and chops Minerva’s head off*

Yoshi: AH HAH HAH HAH HAH HAH HAH!!!!!

Artemis: AHHHH!!! What have you done to Minerva?!?!?

Holly: *pulls off ninja mask* She deserves it!!!

Yoshi: Holy cow! It’s Holly Short! *stares*

Holly: Somebody help me chop her up!!

Yoshi: Okay!! *pulls out samurai sword and chops Minerva up* But why?

Minerva: *plops together* IT’S TOO LATE!! YOU’LL NEVER WIN NOW!!! *Floats into the air and cackles*

Holly: *sighs* Because all this time she’s been a decoy for Opal Koboi. She was going to sell Artemis to Opal for a box of cookies!!!

Minerva: Exactly!!! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!! COOKIES!! *ties Artemis up*

Artemis: HEY! I saved you from a crazy Taiwanese murderer with awesome hair, three years ago, remember? Is this how I’m repaid?

Minerva: It’s nothing personal. I just want cookies. Sugar cookies are one of my two weaknesses. You’ll never guess the other one!!!

Yoshi: Oh yeah?!

Minerva: Yeah! You’ll never find it in a million years!!!

Yoshi: What if I said you were FAT?!

Minerva: NOOO!!! NOT MY EGO!!!

Yoshi: FAAAAAAAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Minerva: *shrivels up and dies*

Yoshi: Whoa, awesome!! And this means I WIN!!!!

Artemis: Ahh!! You killed Minerva!!

Yoshi: For two reasons. One, I’m crazy, you should have figured that out long ago. Two, I hated Minerva with a fiery passion that will never die, even though she did.

Minerva: *unshrivels and comes back to life* THAT’S WHAT YOU THINK!!!!

Opal: *flies through smashed window* I will get Artemis yet!!!

Yoshi: Ahh! It’s Opal Koboi!! *stares*

Artemis: *still tied up* Will you stop staring at us?!?!?!

Yoshi: Nevah!! And hey, Minerva, how come you did not totally die?

Minerva: You cannot kill me because I am a permanent character. You can, however, melt my face off or something cruel like that.

Yoshi: Great idea! *grabs flamethrower*

Minerva: *sighs* I should not have said that. Opal, you’re on your own on this one. *floats out window*

Opal: Oh, well. *picks Artemis up by rope and starts to fly out window*

Yoshi: Oh no you don’t! *grabs Artemis by the feet*

Opal: You can not defeat me! I will bio-bomb you all! *puts down Artemis and pulls out bio-bomb*

Yoshi: *grabs bio-bomb and throws it out window*

Minerva: HOLY…! *becomes vaporized by bio-bomb*

Yoshi: So there. Wait, will she come back or stay as bad-smelling Minerva vapor?

Minerva: *resolidifies* Come back. But I’ve had enough. It’s time for me to go home and yell at Bobo.

Yoshi: Okay, bye then. No hard feelings?

Minerva: Don’t talk to me. *floats off into distance and goes over horizon*

Opal: Great. *sighs* I think I’ll go off in a corner with a bowl of truffles. *leaves*

Yoshi: That was AWESOME!!

Artemis: Hey, I’m still tied up. Aren’t you going to do anything about that?

Yoshi: Oh, right. *steals Artemis’s left sock*

Artemis: Hey! I meant to untie me!!

Yoshi: Picky, picky, picky. *unties Artemis*

Artemis. That’s better. Let’s go back, Holly.

Holly: Okey doke.

Yoshi: Wait a minute!! You guys can’t leave yet!!

Artemis: Why not?

Yoshi: You forgot your mission!!

Artemis: THAT’S RIGHT! WE DID!!

Holly: Oh, pollution….page…

Holly: Hey, human, will you help us? We could use another person.

Yoshi: *puts hands on hips* I have a name, you know.

Holly: Okay, fine. Let me rephrase that. Hey, human-with-a-name, will you help us?

Yoshi: That’s not what I meant… Okay, whatever. Anyway, of COURSE I’ll help!

Artemis: Good. We need to go find somebody.

Yoshi: Who do you need to find?

Artemis: We need to find somebody named Yoshi. The Yoshi who steals everyone’s left socks.

Yoshi: *turns red* Ah, I don’t know if I can help you with that.

Artemis: Why not? And what’s your name?

Yoshi: Ahhh…. My name is…. Jim-Bob. And I can’t tell you why I can’t help you find Yoshi.

Artemis: *gives me skeptical look* Jim-Bob? You’re a girl.

Yoshi: Well, look who’s talking, mister goddess?

Artemis: *turns red* That name can be used for males and females!!

Yoshi: Well, whoever said ‘Jim-Bob’ can’t?

Holly: Will you both shut up? We need to find somebody who knows about this Yoshi character. Ah… Jim-Bob… do you know anybody?

Ally Kat: *comes in through window* I know Yoshi!!

Artemis: Good. Where can we find her?

Ally Kat: *points at me* Right there.

Yoshi: TRAITOR!!

Artemis: *glares at me* You fiend!

Yoshi: Hey! She’s the one who sends you letter bombs!

Artemis: *switches glare to Ally Kat* So that was you!

Holly: Oh, gods. Well, at any rate, we have Yoshi.

Yoshi: OH NO YOU DON’T!! *picks up flamethrower* I’m keeping all the socks!!!

Holly: *sighs*

Yoshi: She’s also the one who sent you the Pokemon army!

Ally Kat: Oh, shut up! You’re the general, remember?

Yoshi: What’s that got to do with anything?

Ally Kat: That means you’re in charge of the army!

Artemis: Argh!! Will you two stop arguing? I’m taking you both in!!

Yoshi: Guess what else she does?

Ally Kat: You wouldn’t!

Yoshi: I would. ALLY KAT CRASHES FOALY’S COMPUTER!!

Everyone: *shocked*

Ally Kat: What? It’s fun! And Artemis, it’s not like I’m crashing your computer, I only hack yours!

Artemis: *splutters* YOU HACK MY COMPUTER?!?!?

Ally Kat: What, is that a problem?

Artemis: YES, A VERY BIG PROBLEM!!!

Holly: *intrigued* What is the ‘very big problem’?

Artemis: MY DIARY IS ON THERE!!!

Ally Kat: *chuckles* Hmmm, I suppose I should go break that encryption then, now that I know what it’s protecting…

Artemis: DON’T YOU EVEN THINK ABOUT IT!!!!

Ally Kat: *pulls out laptop* Oh, I’m thinking about it all right. *logs in to Artemis’s network*

Artemis: Noooooooooo!!!!!!

Ally Kat: Boy, this is juicy!! Fanfiction is gonna LOVE this!!

Holly: *still intrigued* What’s so juicy?

Ally Kat: First of all, Arty really doesn’t secretly love lollipops. In fact, he’s afraid of them.

Artemis: *turns red*

Yoshi: That IS juicy! Why is he afraid of them?

Artemis: NOOO!! THAT’S PRIVATE!!

Ally Kat: He saw a TV show when he was little about giant monster lollipops, apparently.

Yoshi: Hey, Arty-boy, care to elaborate on that?

Artemis: *turns purple* The lollipops were eating people. I got nightmares, OKAY?!

Yoshi: Hey, Ally Kat, what else is on there?

Ally Kat: *shocked* Um, you should read this yourself.

Yoshi: *leans over, reads, becomes super-mega shocked* Wow, Arty. I didn’t know that.

Yoshi and Ally Kat: *simultaneously* Artemis reads ALL THE FANFICTIONS ON FANGATHERING!!

Artemis: *turns blue* It’s a way to pass the time. I DID NOT GET HOLLY PREGNANT!!!!!

Holly: WHAT DID YOU SAY?!?!?!!? *glares at Artemis*

Artemis: THAT’S WHAT SOME PSYCHOS SAID ON THAT SITE!!!

Holly: ….. Mud People. There’s no explaining them.

Kagome: Yes there is!! *jumps in through window* We’re all crazy!! That’s how you explain us.

Artemis: *sighs* We really need to get that window closed somehow. …page…

Yoshi: AAAAH!! The smoke alarm is going off!! Somebody’s burning down my house!!!

Ally Kat: You weren’t paying enough attention. I also sent for…

Ninja: *jumps through window and puts knife to Artemis’s throat*

Ally Kat: …..That.

Yoshi: Everybody needs to get out!! Including Mr. Ninja-who-I-am-going-to-kick-the-butt-of-for-threatening-Arty!! We’re out of room in here anyway!!

Ninja: MISTER ninja? *pulls off mask*

Yoshi: OH NO! It’s Opal Koboi again!!!

Holly: We need to get outside!! *jumps out window*

Ally Kat: *jumps out window*

Opal: *jumps out window carrying Artemis*

Yoshi: *jumps out window*

Kagome: *hops out window and sees everyone looking at her* Well, jumping got repetitive.

Yoshi: AAAAH!! Some crazy person set fire to my house!!

Ally Kat: Well, I still have the laptop. *continues to read Artemis’s diary*’

Artemis: What do I have to do to get you to stop reading my diary?

Ally Kat: Wait ’til I’m done is what you have to do. Ooh, here’s a juicy one. Guess what?

Everyone except Artemis and Ally Kat: What?

Artemis: NOOOOO!!!

Ally Kat: ARTEMIS SLEEPS WITH A BLANKIE!!!!!!

Everyone: *super-mega-dee-dooperly shocked* …page…

Artemis: *turns green*

Yoshi: Heh. Heh heh. Heh heh HEHE HEHHEEH HEHEEHEHEHEHEHEAHAHEHHEAHHAHEHAHHEHAH!!!!!!

Artemis: You don’t have to laugh so loud.

Opal: Oh, that is priceless. I have to go put a camera in his bedroom. *flies off*

Yoshi: Ah hhah hah hah… *wipes tear away* At any rate, I have to get a new house. *looks at Ally Kat evilly*

Ally Kat: What?

Yoshi: HAH!!! *snatches laptop and hacks Ally Kat’s e-mail* Now I have your address!! *uses super-awesome psychic Yoshi power to transport the whole group to Ally Kat’s address*

Ally Kat: Hey!! Why didn’t you tell us you had super-awesome psychic Yoshi power?!

Yoshi: You didn’t ask. *looks at Ally Kat’s house critically* This will do.

Ally Kat: HEY!!

Yoshi: You burned down MY house. That gives me right to YOUR house.

Ally Kat: That was your fault!!

Yoshi: *snorts* Even if it was my fault, I’d blame you and still take your house. *goes inside*

Holly: Hey, we still need to arrest you two.

Yoshi: *pops head out door* And what happens to us, if you do arrest us?

Artemis: YOU, Yoshi, would have to go through sock-stealing therapy. YOU, Ally Kat, would have to go through computer therapy.

Yoshi: Who teaches these classes?

Artemis: Foaly and I do.

Yoshi and Ally Kat: WE’LL GO QUIETLY!!!!

Artemis: See, Holly, I told you.

Yoshi: I just have one more thing to say.

Holly: And what is that?

Yoshi: *steals Holly’s left sock*

Holly: I hope you give that back eventually. *puts cuffs on both of us*

Flare: *walks onto Ally Kat’s YOSHI’S lawn* You can’t go back yet!!!!

Holly and Artemis: Why not?

Flare: Because I haven’t gotten to DO anything yet!!!

Kagome: You have to admit, that’s good reasoning. …page…

Flare: Yoshi, you don’t HAVE to steal her house, you know.

Yoshi: Um, yes I do. She burned my house down.

Flare: Is it burned to the ground?

Yoshi: Umm, I would have to check. *uses super-awesome psychic Yoshi power to transport whole group to Yoshi’s old house*

Flare: Well, ONE room is burned to the ground.

Yoshi: *shrugs* That’s my sister’s bedroom. I don’t care either way. But the rest will soon burn down as well!!!

Flare: Maybe not. *pulls out walkie-talkie and starts speaking into it* Hey, Toushiro?

Toushiro: *out of walkie-talkie* Uh oh. Something tells me I’ll need my copy of “Fire Fighting for Amateurs”.

Flare: You’re right. Get over here quick, Yoshi’s house is on fire!!

Toushiro: *appears out of midair holding book* Was that quick enough?

Holly: …I’m not even going to ask how you got here.

Artemis: How is that book going to help with a fire if you have no resources?

Toushiro: Watch and learn. *opens book and points it at fire as book starts shooting water wildly*

Kagome: That is awesome! Where does the water come from?

Toushiro: Artemis’s private Jacuzzi’s water stash.

Ally Kat: Artemis has a private Jacuzzi?

Artemis: *turns yellow*

Yoshi: Hey, Artemis, what’s with the color changes??

Artemis: Normal people turn red, then purple. I don’t stop there.

Yoshi: ….. I can’t believe you sometimes. …page…

Yoshi: Hooray!! My house is saved!!!

Holly: It doesn’t really matter, you know. You will have to stay underground while in therapy.

Flare: So, that was pointless?

Artemis: Basically. Because once humans have gone through fairy therapy, they have to either stay underground forever, or be mindwiped and relocated to some other continent to prevent recall.

Yoshi: I think I’ll probably stay underground if those are my only choices.

Ally Kat: I wanna be adopted by Foaly!!!!

Artemis: I’ll have to ask Foaly about that. But as long as you’re neat and like carrots, you’ll probably be fine.

Ally Kat: BOOYAH!!

Yoshi: Hey, Arty-boy, why did you come from a dimensional hole?

Artemis: We do not exist in the same dimension. You live in one, and Holly and I live in another.

Yoshi: Coolness!!! *realizes something* Hey, where will I be staying?

Artemis: We did not have plans for the two of you, so I suppose you if you were to express a feasible preference–

Yoshi: FOWL MANOR!!!!!

Artemis: *splutters* What?!

Kagome: NO FAIR!!!!!

Toushiro: WE WANT THERAPY TOO!!!

Flare: YEAH!! THERAPY!!!

Ally Kat: Nope. Only the ones they say can go can go.

Artemis and Holly: You guys can come too.

Ally Kat: Drat.

Kagome, Toushiro and Flare: HOOORAAAAY!!!!!!

Kagome: I get crazy anime therapy!!!

Toushiro: I get crazy ninja person therapy!!!

Flare: I get general craziness therapy too!!!

Ally Kat: Nobody else gets adopted by Foaly!!!!

Yoshi: And I’m gonna stay at Arty’s house!!!

Artemis: No, you’re not!! You can stay at my underground visit room, but not at Fowl Manor.

Yoshi: What’s your underground visit room like?

Artemis: It’s pretty nice.

Yoshi: Okay, I’m sold. If it’s nice by Artemis Fowl’s standards, it’s more than good enough for me.

Artemis: Time to go, then. We’ll figure everything else out when we get there.

Whole group: *disappears*

Mysterious person who heard the whole thing: So that’s where they’re going. Better not lose any more time. *disappears*

…page…

Yoshi: COOLNESS!! WE’RE AT FOWL MANOR!! *runs around in a circle and falls over*

Artemis: Ahhh! Would you please stop?!

Yoshi: *gets up* Okay!

Butler: So how’d it go? And why are there so many extra people?

Artemis: They all need therapy. They’re Fanfiction loonies, so there are no guarantees, but I thought I would do for them what I could.

Sora Cullen Butler: Did somebody say Fanfiction? *walks into main area*

Butler: Who are you?! *puts hand on Sig Sauer*

Sora Cullen Butler: My last name is Butler. Who are you?

Butler: *perplexed* My last name is Butler. I’m Artemis’s bodyguard.

Sora Cullen Butler: And your first name is Domovoi, no doubt. Where is Juliet?

Butler: *glares* How do you know all this??

Artemis: Yoshi mentioned a book series. I think it’s Foaly’s idea of a joke.

Butler: Which one’s Yoshi?

Artemis: *points at Yoshi*

Yoshi: Yup, that’s me. Why do you ask?

Butler: You’re infamous for stealing socks around the globe.

Yoshi: *chuckles* Awesome.

Artemis: They’re all going through therapy soon.

Yoshi: Yup. *sighs* My reign of sock-stealing is just about over.

Sora Cullen Butler: What about me, anyway?

Artemis: As soon as you prove your heritage, you can stay at the lodge with Butler and Juliet.

Kagome: No fair! She gets to stay the closest to Fowl Manor!!

Toushiro: That is not fair at all!

Flare: I wanna stay at the lodge!!

Angeline: *comes down stairs* What is this??

Artemis: Ahh… Foaly leaked my story somehow and now I have a fan club.

Angeline: Isn’t that nice? Where are they all staying?

Artemis: What do you mean, where are they staying? They live around here.

Angeline: No, they don’t. They’ve all got different accents.

Yoshi: You’re right. We aren’t from around here. *ignores Artemis’s glare* I’m American, and so is Ally Kat, and I don’t know where everyone else lives, but not around here.

Angeline: Well, I’ll save you the trouble of getting a hotel room and just let you all stay here. We definitely have enough room, and it’s no trouble.

Artemis: *pales, bites lip and swallows hard*

Fanfiction peeps: *widen eyes* REALLY?!??!

Angeline: Yes, really. *smiles at Artemis* It’s good for Arty to have people his age around him. He’s only had practice intimidating his peers before now.

Artemis: *turns red*

Yoshi: *tries not to explode with happiness and almost fails*

Artemis: But… They’re my fan club! How can you predict the outcome of this encounter?

Angeline: First of all, if you have a fan club already you will need to learn to deal with your fans. Second of all, you need to practice your social skills with someone who will easily forgive you for any blunders. Third, they look nice enough.

Artemis: *sighs* I guess I don’t have a choice. Fan club, please follow me, and I’ll show you your rooms.

Ally Kat: I want to be adopted by Foaly, remember?

Artemis: We’ll figure that out tomorrow.

Yoshi: Where are Beckett and Myles?

Artemis: Beckett is up in the playroom, and Myles is in his ‘lab’.

Yoshi: Cool. Now where’s the room?

Artemis: *perplexed* What do Beckett and Myles have to do with the temperature?

Yoshi: *perplexed* Oh, you meant… ‘Cool’ is an informal saying along the lines of ‘Good’ or ‘Perfect’ or ‘All right’.

Artemis: I understand. You neurotypical people and your phrases.

Yoshi: Oh, I wouldn’t say I was neurotypical. But I take your point.

Artemis: *leads group to separate rooms*…page…

Toushiro: *sneaks into Yoshi’s room*

Yoshi: *closes door* Okay, what the dog doo are you doing in here?

Toushiro: Do you know the way to Artemis’s room?

Yoshi: I know the general way. He headed up a flight of stairs after leading me here, but I think I could find it if I had to. Why do you ask?

Toushiro: *puts on innocent expression* Oh, no reason.

Yoshi: Darn. I was hoping you would suggest us all hide in Arty’s room and scare him to bits.

Toushiro: *gives Yoshi surprised look* How did you know that?

Yoshi: I have super-awesome psychic Yoshi power, remember?

Toushiro: You mean you can read people’s MINDS??

Yoshi: Eh… Not really. You just had this look on your face that made me think you were up to something.

Toushiro: So, you’re in?

Yoshi: Of course!! *grins*

Toushiro: Good! I’ve already got everybody else too!!!

LATER, IN ARTEMIS FOWL’S BEDROOM…

Artemis: Ah, it’s nice to be away from all those Fanfiction loonies. *sits down on bed*

Yoshi: *desperately tries not to steal sock from under bed*

Artemis: Although they’re more fun to be around than Minerva. Not as smart, maybe, but more unpredictable.

Ally Kat: *covers mouth and turns red in attempt to not burst out laughing*

Toushiro: *shushes Ally Kat*

Artemis: What the… What was that noise? *checks under bed*

Everybody under bed: BOO!!!!!

Artemis: WAAAAAAAAAGHHH!!!!!! *falls over*

Yoshi: Finally, you noticed us! *steals left sock*

Artemis: HOW ON EARTH DID YOU GUYS GET IN HERE?!?!?!

Toushiro: What do you mean, how did we get in here? We opened the door and walked right in!

Artemis: But that door has a NUMBER LOCK ON IT!!!

Yoshi: You’re right. We did get a little help.

Juliet: *walks out of closet* Hello, Artemis.

Artemis: You helped these psychopaths break into my room?!

Juliet: Why not? They gave me a wrestling video, and all they were doing was scaring you.

Artemis: BUTLER!!!

Fanfiction peeps: Oh bleep!! *run out door*

Butler: *walks in* What is it, Artemis?

Artemis: The guests broke into my room. Just go watch the surveillance tape!

Butler: *watches surveillance tape*

Artemis: Well?

Butler: *busts out laughing*

Artemis: I can see that I’m not going to get any help in this matter. Heaven knows what those loonies will do tomorrow….page…THE NEXT MORNING IN ALLY KAT’S ROOM…

Artemis: Wake up. Mom says I have to get all you people up personally.

Ally Kat: Five more minutes.

Artemis: I don’t have time for this. Wake up.

Ally Kat: Don’t make me get out my seashell sword.

Artemis: And where do you keep your seashell sword?

Ally Kat: *retrieves sword from under pillow, leaps across room and puts sword to Artemis’s neck* Right here.

Artemis: Eh heh heh…. BUUUTTTLLLEEERRR!!!!

Butler: *runs into room* What the…

Ally Kat: *releases Artemis*

Artemis: *rubs neck* Butler, maybe you should accompany me to wake up the others.

Artemis and Butler: *walk out of room*

Ally Kat: *pulls walkie-talkie from pillowcase and speaks into it* The Irish boy is headed your way, but he’s got Butler with him. I’ll cause a distraction.

Kagome: *out of walkie-talkie* Good. Heh heh heh.

IN KAGOME’S ROOM…

Artemis: Hello, you need to wake up.

Ally Kat: *outside room* Aaaiiiiiieeeeeeee!!!!!

Butler: What is THAT?! *runs out of room*

Kagome: HAH!!! *drops sack over Artemis*

Artemis: HEY!!!

Butler: *runs back into room* What did I… OH MY GOD!!!

Kagome: Curses, foiled again. *releases Artemis*

Artemis: *shivers* Crazy ninja girl next. Do we really have to?

Butler: If she wakes up on her own, she could surprise you without you even knowing she was up.

Artemis: Okay, okay.

IN TOUSHIRO’S ROOM…

Artemis: *clinging to Butler’s leg* Wake up and DON’T ATTACK ME!!!

Toushiro: Dang. *puts away Japanese ninja weapons*

Artemis: Hey, ninja lady, will you help me wake up Yoshi?

Toushiro: I have to get dressed. You’re on your own.

Artemis: Uh oh.

IN YOSHI’S ROOM…

Artemis: WAKE UP AND DON’T KILL ME!!!!!

Yoshi: *puts pillow over head* Two things. One, I wouldn’t kill you, I would kidnap you. Two, you act like everyone you woke up before me tried to do both.

Artemis: They did.

Yoshi: Whatever. *throws pillow at Artemis*

Artemis: Breakfast is downstairs. *leaves*

IN FLARE’S ROOM…

Artemis: Eh… Wake up.

Flare: *throws fireball at Artemis’s head* Go away.

Artemis: AAAAAOOOWWWWCHHH!!!

Flare: Keep it down, will ya?

Artemis: *hurriedly* Okay, you’re up. Goodbye. *leaves*

AT THE BREAKFAST TABLE…

Angeline: How did everybody sleep?

Kagome: Just wonderfully. *grins angelically*

Ally Kat: *smiles*

Artemis: *rolls eyes*

Angeline: What do you have planned for today?

Artemis: I thought I’d take them to meet some friends.

Angeline: *nods knowingly* Take care.

Artemis: Don’t worry. It won’t be that much of a catastrophe.

Fanfiction peeps: *under breath* Don’t bet on that. …page…Angeline: I trust you can take care of yourselves the rest of the day. *goes up stairs*

Artemis: Time to go to therapy. *leads everyone outside*

Ally Kat: What exactly are we doing out here?

Artemis: Looking for something. Ah, here it is. *opens door out of nowhere*

Kagome: What the… Where did that come from?!

Artemis: It’s a stealth shuttle. We can’t go out in a regular LEP shuttle or people might be alarmed by it. *leads everyone inside and sits down in passenger side*

Flare: Goodness, there’s no room in stealth shuttles either!!

Holly: There’s actually more room in here than standard LEP shuttles. You’re just bigger than the average fairy.

Yoshi: Whatever, let’s just go.

Holly: Okey doke. *starts engine and starts flying*

Artemis: How are you doing back there?

Everyone in back: *cramped* Not too good.

Holly: That’s not very host-like of you, making them all sit back there like that.

Artemis: They have yet to act guest-like.

Kagome: *chuckles* Fair enough.

Holly: We’re here. *opens door*

Toushiro: That was fast.

Holly: New boosters. Developed by —

Foaly: *clops up to door* Me.

Ally Kat: OMIGOSH!!!! *leaps out door and hugs Foaly* ADOPT ME!!!!

Foaly: Um. Little help, Holly?

Ally Kat: *releases Foaly*

Artemis: Come on. *leads everyone to therapy room* This is where our therapy will be.

Foaly: You guys, sit down in those desks, and we can begin.

Everyone: *sits down*

Foaly: Now, you guys will take turns saying why you act why you do, so we can help fix it. You’ll be taking this therapy with somebody else, too.

Opal Koboi: *walks through door* Me. *sighs* It’s a pity. I wasn’t unhappy being all crazy, it’s just that nobody would agree to my plans for world domination.

Kagome: OPAL YOU’RE MY IDOL!!!

Opal: *fixes Kagome with cool stare* My first devoted fan. I wasn’t aware that you were going to be human.

Kagome: Well, I am.

Foaly: Opal. Why do you try to take over the world?

Opal: Because right now idiots like you run it, and I figure I can do much better.

Foaly: *rolls eyes* Ally Kat, why do you write fanfics and threaten people with your seashell sword?

Ally Kat: To work my way up to get a chance to be adopted by you.

Foaly:…..Okay then. Toushiro, why do you choose to be a crazy ninja?

Toushiro: Because it’s fun and nobody threatens me, EVER.

Foaly: What about you, Flare?

Flare: It’s no fun to control fire and be sane.

Foaly: Ever try not controlling fire?

Flare: Ever try not breathing for ten minutes? Possible, but no fun whatsoever. Same principle.

Foaly: Okay, Kagome. Why are you so crazy?

Kagome: Because it’s entertaining and it gets people to update quicker.

Foaly: How about you, Yoshi?

Yoshi: Sock-stealing is FUN!!! And being associated with a light blue Yoshi is also fun!!!

Foaly: Oooookay. You know what, maybe we don’t need all these different therapies. Whoever’s obsessed with Artemis, raise your hand.

Flare, Yoshi, Ally Kat, and Toushiro: *raise hands*

Holly: *raises Artemis’s hand*

Artemis: *glares daggers at Holly*

Foaly: Whoever’s obsessed with Opal, raise your hand.

Kagome and Opal: *raise hands*

Foaly: Okay, looks like we can do obsession therapy. Why are you guys obsessed?

Everyone except Foaly, Artemis and Holly: BECAUSE THEY ARE AMAZINGLY AWESOME!!!

Foaly: Okay, time for you guys to leave.

Yoshi: But why do we have to leave so soon?

Artemis: We agreed that the sessions would end whenever either of us got a headache.

Foaly: And by the looks of it, you guys will be leaving within half an hour of whenever you get here every time.

Everyone else: *sighs and leaves* …page…

BACK AT FOWL MANOR…

Artemis: Now let’s just go back inside and —

Vera: *jumps out of woods* Hi peoples!!!

Artemis: Aaauugh!!! Another Fanfic loony?!?!

Vera: Yup. *grins*

Artemis: Do I have to house you too?!

Vera: I would appreciate it, seeing as I have nowhere else to go.

Artemis: *sighs deeply* Fine. Join the group. *leads everyone inside*

Sora Cullen Butler: *walks into main room* Why didn’t I get therapy??

Artemis: You didn’t act crazy enough. *sighs* I’ll add you and this new person, now that you ask, though.

Ally Kat: Where were you, Vera?

Vera: Following you guys. It wasn’t easy to track the dimensional tunnel.

Kagome: Well, here. *hands Vera walkie-talkie* That’s for any mischief we might cook up. Everyone else has one too.

Vera: You guys aren’t exactly the perfect guests, are you?

Kagome: *chuckles evilly* That depends on your definition of perfect guests.

LATER, IN YOSHI’S ROOM…

Yoshi: So, I called this meeting for everyone’s favorite hobby, irritating the living crap out of Arty dear.

Ally Kat, Kagome, Toushiro, Flare, Sora Cullen Butler, and Vera: Hear hear!!

Yoshi: So does anyone have a plan?

Toushiro: How are we s’posed to get at him with Butler around??

Yoshi: Ah, we have something they could never hope to match us in.

Ally Kat: Awesomeness?

Yoshi: Randomness. *grins*

Sora Cullen Butler: So what are you thinking?

Yoshi: I’m thinking we should do something Artemis’d never ever expect.

Vera: Like what?

Yoshi: *smiles quite evilly* Asking Butler for help. …page…

LATER…

Butler: *chuckles* You guys don’t stop, do you?

Fanfiction peeps: *waiting nervously*

Butler: I guess I could help, if you’re not going to hurt him.

Everyone else: YAY!!!

Random kitty: *leaps through window* PET ME!!!

Yoshi: What the… Oh, all right. *pets random kitty*

Random kitty: *purrs* That’s better. Maybe I can help you with your plan.

Yoshi: Do tell. *continues petting random kitty*

Random kitty: So you’re planning to irritate Artemis Fowl?

Kagome: Yeah, we are. Just spit out whatever you were going to say.

Random kitty: Fine. I was going to suggest, for starters, doing something along the lines of putting a whoopee cushion on his seat.

Yoshi: We don’t have a whoopee cushion. Any other ideas?

Random kitty: Fine, how about you just get his clothes all messy and gross somehow?

Everyone but random kitty and Butler: *look at each other* Yeah!!!

LATER, IN ARTEMIS’S BEDROOM:

Artemis: *walks in* What are you guys doing in here?

Random kitty: Purrrr… *rubs against Artemis’s legs and gets cat hair all over them*

Artemis: What is a a cat doing in here?

Everyone else: Surprise!!! *throw pencils at Artemis*

Artemis: What is this about? What’re you throwing pencils at me for??

Flare: Because the pencils are full of GREEN SLIME!!!

Pencils: *blow up, covering Artemis with green slime*

Artemis: EEEEEEEEWWWW!!!!!!

Fanfiction peeps: Mission accomplished!!! *high fives*

Artemis: Lucky for me, I just finished my new invention, the DeSlimer 2000!!! *pulls little pink striped box from pocket and vacuums up all the slime with it*

Vera: *stares at little pink striped box* Where’d you get that color??

Artemis: *grimaces* Juliet helped design it. Anyway, I win this round!!!

Random kitty: Oh no, you don’t!!! *leaps at little pink striped box, breaking it and causing the slime to spatter all over Artemis again*

Artemis: D’ARVIT!!!!!

Fanfiction peeps: WE WIN!! OH YEAH!!…page…

THE NEXT MORNING AT BREAKFAST…

Artemis: *glaring slightly, with dark circles under his eyes*

Sora Cullen Butler: Jeez, Artemis, you look terrible.

Artemis: Coping with defeat is not my strong point.

Flare: You mean you couldn’t sleep because we pulled a prank on you??

Artemis: *grins evilly* No, because I was planning my revenge.

Angeline: What did you guys do to him last night?!

Toushiro: Um, we kind of covered him in green slime.

Angeline: *widens eyes and chuckles* I would have to guess he didn’t like that.

Kagome: Well, he had an invention that cleaned it up…

Ally Kat: But we broke it and he got covered in slime again. *giggles in spite of herself*

Artemis: *grumbles*

Angeline: Well, you best be careful then. His revenge will be swift and possibly humiliating.

Artemis: *grins evilly*

Fanfiction peeps: *look at each other* Uh oh.

LATER THAT MORNING, IN HAVEN THERAPY…

Foaly: Okay, time for therapy. Today we have two new people, Vera and Sora Cullen Butler.

Everyone else (Artemis sarcastically): Yay, new crazies!!!

Foaly: Yes, new crazies. But since we’re now running Obsession Therapy, we don’t need for them to say why they’re obsessed. We know all too well. Instead, Artemis is going to make a speech, because he’s the one you’re all mostly obsessed with.

Opal and Kagome: Why do WE have to listen to it??

Foaly: Unless you want me to give you a lecture on how my latest invention works?

Opal and Kagome: Never mind. We’ll listen to Artemis instead.

Artemis: *starts speech*

FIVE HOURS LATER…

Artemis: …And that’s what you need to do in order to build a revolving magnetic field.

Everyone else: *snoring with heads on desks*

Foaly: *wakes up and rubs eyes* Is it over?

Artemis: *slightly hoarsely* Yes, and everyone else is asleep. Time to get them back for covering me with slime.

HALF AN HOUR LATER, ON THE SHUTTLE TO ABOVEGROUND…

Fanfiction peeps: *wake up wearing chicken costumes*

Vera: AAAAACK!!! I’M WEARING A CHICKEN COSTUME!!!!

Artemis: *chuckling evilly* No kidding.

Yoshi: WHAT THE FRICK?!?

Toushiro: OH, ARTEMIS, YOU ARE SO ASKING FOR IT!!!!

Kagome: THIS IS IT!!!

Ally Kat: GET THE MUD BOY!!!

Fanfiction peeps: *circle around Artemis and start pecking him viciously*

Artemis: AAAAOOOOOOWWWWCCCCHHHH!!!!

Holly: Um, we’re here, you guys. If you can stop pecking Arty long enough to get out.

Artemis: *jumps out of shuttle and runs inside, followed by a horde of furious chickens* BUTLER HELP ME!!!

Butler: What the (censored in order to keep my story profanity-free) is going on?!

Artemis: I’M BEING PECKED TO DEATH BY A MOB OF MY ANGRY FANS DRESSED AS CHICKENS!!!!!!

Angeline: *smiles* I guess your revenge didn’t work as well as you hoped…

Artemis: Now I have to plan my revenge for my revenge!!!

Ally Kat: Give it up, Mud Boy!!! *pecks Artemis again* …page…

THE NEXT MORNING…

Artemis: *yawns and gets up* Well, the Fanfiction loonies didn’t kill me last night.

Butler: *sitting by door with dark circles under eyes* They tried. Particularly Ninja Girl, Yoshi, and that one I think you called Kagome.

Artemis: *glances out window and sees person looking in* Aaaaack!!!! Wait, that’s not one of our registered Fanfiction loonies. Who IS that?!

Butler: *opens window* Who on earth are YOU?

Wishes: *climbs in window carrying backpack* My name is Wishes. I heard that you were running crazy therapy.

Artemis: So you mean you will go to therapy quietly?

Wishes: *chuckles* I guess. I just want to see Foaly try to give ME therapy.

Artemis: Oooookay then. Are you going to be on my side or the crazy side?

Wishes: Um, what?

Kagome: *breaks in through door* He means are you going to be on our side or his side!!!

Wishes: For what?

Artemis: Revenge!!! *hurls water balloon at Kagome*

Kagome: *slices balloon in half and splatters floor with contents* Artemis, you filled this balloon with PAINT?!

Artemis: ….Urgh. The carpet is ruined now.

Wishes: I think I’m gonna be on the crazy side, thank you very much. *walks over and links arms with Kagome*

Kagome: Welcome to the world of crazies. Let’s join the others and plan our revenge.

Wishes and Kagome: *walk off*

Artemis: Time for me to plan MY revenge. *sits down in the lotus position*

IN YOSHI’S ROOM…

Yoshi: I called this meeting in honor of the terrible tragedy that befell us; namely, falling asleep in therapy and getting dressed as chickens.

Everyone except Wishes: *grumble and glare in Artemis’s room’s general direction*

Wishes: He dressed you guys as CHICKENS???

Flare: Yeah, and he nearly got pecked to death for it.

Toushiro: That’s why he’s planning his revenge. And that’s why we are planning OUR revenge. And that’s why we probably need to hurry if we want to get our revenge in first.

Wishes: Well, I brought these for no good reason… *pulls box of markers from backpack*

Everyone else: *look at each other* Cool!

Vera: Those look like something that Beckett would like.

Yoshi: *smiles* Well, maybe we should give them to him, for a price.

LATER, IN THE PLAYROOM…

Yoshi: Hey, Beckett, will you help us with something?

Beckett: What does you need help wif?

Myles: *walks in* Brother dear, your grammar is terrible.

Sora Cullen Butler: Hey, Myles, we could use your help too, I guess.

Beckett: We’re listening to you now, okay?

Myles: Yes, we’re listening.

Yoshi: You see, we need your help. Artemis dressed us up as chickens and we want to get him back.

Beckett: *giggles*

Myles: So, it’s revenge you’re after. I’ll help you, for a price.

Wishes: What’s the price?

Myles: *smiles mischieviously* Cookies. But we’ll need Mountain Dew for my plan.

Beckett: I can’t have Mountain Dew. It crazifies me.

Myles: *smiles hugely*

Everyone else: Uh oh.

IN ARTEMIS’S ROOM…

Artemis: Now I’ll just go and finish my revenge… Wait, what was that noise?

Beckett: *on total Mountain Dew high* WOOOOHOOOOO!!!!! *jumps out and scribbles all over Artemis’s suit*

Artemis: WAAAAGH!!! *runs out of room*

Beckett: Oooh ooooh ooh ooh ooh!!! *runs in room and draws demented Spongebobs all over Artemis’s wall in permanent marker*

Fanfiction peeps: *standing outside door in awe*

Ally Kat: Myles, how do you LIVE with this kid???

Myles: *smiling in a satisfied manner* The simple-toon is dangerous on soda high, isn’t he? …page…

Fanfiction peeps: *walking back to rooms* Wow, that was awesome!!! Did you see Arty’s expression?

Artemis: MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! *pulls lever, making purple muck fall on Fanfiction peeps*

Fanfiction peeps: *huddle for a couple seconds, then face Artemis* We’ve come to a conclusion…

Ally Kat: GET THE STUPID MUD BOY!!!!

Fanfiction peeps: *charge after Artemis*

Artemis: AAAAAAACK!!!!!! *runs away*

Wishes: Wait, guys. Chasing him is not going to do us any good. We need to plan.

Kagome: *sighs* But I wanna chase him…

Yoshi: He’ll be expecting that. What we need to do is beat him at his own game.

Ally Kat: I hope you’re thinking something cruel and unusual.

Yoshi: *smiles evilly* That I am.

THE NEXT MORNING…

Artemis: Wow, I’m still alive.

Butler: *sitting near door with dark circles under eyes and singed eyebrows* Believe me, you wouldn’t be if they had anything to say about it.

Artemis: Well, if they don’t retaliate, they won’t be humiliated again.

Butler: I hardly believe that — *Butler’s phone rings and he answers it* Who are you?…..Where?…..How do I know this isn’t a trap?…..Fine, I’ll be there. *closes phone* Artemis, I have to leave, and you can’t come with me. They say they know about the People, and we both know that that is bad news. So I’ll be gone today.

Artemis: Okay, Butler. I guess one day alone won’t be deadly, although I may lose a couple limbs at the hands of the Fanfiction group. *chuckles at own joke*

Butler: *seriously* Don’t underestimate them, Artemis. *leaves*

Artemis: Uh oh… Now I have to wake them all up… *looks thoughtfully at suit of armor*

LATER, IN ALLY KAT’S ROOM…

Artemis: *clanking in* What the… Where on earth is Ally Kat? *sees note on door and reads it aloud* ‘I bet you’re wondering about your little guests, aren’t you? To find them and get them back, you must follow these instructions. First, you’ll get a phone call. Do what the person on the other end says. Tracking the phone line is pointless, although it would be entertaining if you tried. Don’t try anything funny.’

Myles: *walking in* Artemis, this is serious. You have to go after them.

Artemis: But…*Artemis’s phone rings* This is the phone call! *answers it*

Ally Kat: *in a voice that sounds like Butler* Artemis?

Artemis: Butler! What’s going on?!

Ally Kat: You need to go to this address. *says address*

Artemis: Should I bring Juliet?

Ally Kat: No! You seriously don’t know what you’re dealing with, do you?

Artemis: No, I don’t.

Ally Kat: They say they have Beckett.

Artemis: *instantly* I’m going right now.

AT THE ADDRESS…

Artemis: This is one of those rental houses… *goes inside and jumps as the door shuts and locks behind him*

Artemis’s phone: *rings*

Artemis: *answers phone* Yes?

Ally Kat: *in creepy Mafia voice* Good, you’re here.

Artemis: Yes, I am. I assume you’re not going to tell me your name?

Ally Kat: Not until the time is right. Do you know why you’re here?

Artemis: *tries door* No, I don’t.

Ally Kat: Well, we heard you’re a genius. So we decided; if you get through to the last room of this house, and find your fans and little brother, then we’re prepared to call it even. But if you don’t, and give up, we get to keep you in a basement with only bread and Kool-Aid to eat.

Artemis: Don’t worry, I won’t give up. *goes into next room*

Bucket of dwarf spit: *falls on Artemis’s head*

Artemis: What the… *is frozen by dwarf spit*

Fanfiction peeps: *come into room* Hi Artemis.

Artemis: What on earth???

Vera: We planned this out because of the slime and the chicken costumes. Do you like our revenge so far?

Artemis: Um… This is okay, compared to the slime.

Kagome: *smiles nastily* Oh, this is not all we’re going to do.

Yoshi: But what ARE we going to do??

Wishes: Let’s take a vote!

Ally Kat: LET’S MAKE HIM MEET BARNEY!!

Artemis: NOOOO!!!!!

Yoshi: Barney would likely be too painful.

Toushiro: Jeez, you listen to peaceful people too much.

Wishes: Can we strap him to a chair and make Elmo make out with him?

Artemis: *eyes roll back in head and starts screaming* NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yoshi: *shudders* That would scar ME for life.

Ally Kat: Jeez, we come up with all these great ideas and you come up with zilch!

Yoshi: Why don’t we all stand in a circle and poke him continuously?

Everyone else: *thinking about it*

Ally Kat: Why don’t we be nice and let him go.

Toushiro: WHAT?!?!

Ally Kat: *whispers in Toushiro’s ear*

Toushiro: Yeah, let’s be nice and let him go.

Everyone else: Have you two gone CRAZY?!?!

Fanfiction peeps: *huddle and whisper amongst themselves*

Artemis: What are you doing?

Fanfiction peeps: We’re going to let you go on good faith, if you promise not to seek revenge.

Artemis: *disbelievingly* You’re going to let me go?

Fanfiction peeps: *nod and start picking off the dwarf spit*

Artemis: WOOHOO!!! I GET TO LIVE!!!

Toushiro: Let’s go back to Fowl Manor now.

Everyone else: Yeah….page…

THE NEXT MORNING…

Artemis: Wow! Maybe they really were that freaked out by the thought of my revenge.

Butler: They didn’t even attempt to kill you too many times last night.

Artemis: I guess I don’t need the suit of armor to wake them all up this morning.

LATER, AT THE BREAKFAST TABLE…

Angeline: It’s nice to hear all you guys are friends again.

Artemis: *smiles*

Fanfiction peeps: *smile angelically*

Artemis: Well, we’re probably all going to stay around here today.

Angeline: Well, I’m going to a movie with your dad, Arty, and I think that if you are all on good terms, you can take care of yourselves.

Artemis: You’re probably right.

Fanfiction peeps: Let’s play Frisbee outside!

LATER THAT MORNING, IN YOSHI’S ROOM…

Yoshi: So, who are we gonna call to make the threats?

Vera: Why don’t we call the Mob in Chicago?

Yoshi: *shocked* Don’t they want him dead?

Vera: *grins knowingly* They work for payment. They wanted him dead because Spiro was paying them. If WE pay them, they’ll do whatever we say.

Flare: Sounds good to me. *pulls cell phone out of pocket and calls the Antonellis*

Yoshi: Do we really need to mess with the Mob?

Sora Cullen Butler: Jeez, Yoshi, has your brain gotten un-wonkified or something??

Yoshi: I don’t know. *bites lip*

Flare: *into phone* Yeah, I need you guys for something. It concerns Artemis Fowl. *listens intently* No, I don’t work for Spiro. I’m in Ireland, but I’m prepared to pay anything you ask. *listens intently again* Yes, I’m certain we have enough money. And no, you don’t have to kill Fowl, we’re just making a deal. Just send someone intimidating. *listens intently again* You guys do know where Fowl Manor is, don’t you? Just find someplace around there. Thank you. Good-bye. *hangs up*

Vera: Did you get them?

Flare: I got their help.

Toushiro: *perplexed* But how are you going to pay them??

Flare: You know how Artemis sent millions from Swiss banks to the Fowl account? I hacked into McDonald’s, and borrowed a couple thousand, putting it under an assumed name.

Yoshi: Smart. So now we’ve got somebody from the Mob to do our bidding. Who’ll go to videotape?

Wishes: I’m the one who owns the video recorder. *pulls video recorder from backpack*’

Ally Kat: Then you go, but make sure you get a good video.

Yoshi: And stay out of sight, or this whole thing will fall apart.

Everyone: *goes outside*

Everyone but Wishes: *starts playing Frisbee*

Wishes: *calls Antonelli* You know the person who called a couple minutes ago? I work for them. Can you tell your man to pick me up at Fowl Manor? *listens intently* Yes, you’re working with a bunch of kids. But we’re an obscenely rich bunch of kids. …page…

Artemis: *jumps as phone rings and answers it*

Mobster: *on other end* Are you Artemis Fowl?

Artemis: Yes, who are you?

Mobster: I’m a mobster, can’t you tell just from my voice? I think it deserves at least a little shiver in fear.

Artemis: *shrugs and shivers in fear*

Mobster: Thank you. Now, down to business. We have a business proposition for you.

Artemis: What kind?

Mobster: The kind where you do what we say or you become, shall we say, rather unlucky.

Artemis: *shivers* Meaning what?

Mobster: We curse you and you start tripping a lot more than normal and you spill drinks at embarrassing times.

Artemis: *shudders in horror* So what do you need me to do?

Mobster: Go to this address. *says address of abandoned warehouse*

Artemis: *suspiciously looks out the window at group of Fanfiction peeps playing Frisbee* Who do you work for?

Mobster: I work for nobody but Spatz Antonelli.

Artemis: *internally* Uh oh…

Mobster: Be there soon, or else. *hangs up*

Artemis: Dang. He hung up first. *leaves to go to abandoned warehouse*

LATER, AT THE ABANDONED WAREHOUSE…

Artemis: *walks in warily* Hello?

Mobster: Hello. Do you see this pool of acid? *gestures toward huge tub of acid*

Artemis: Yes, I do. But how are you going to threaten me with it? I already know you don’t have my family, and I probably don’t like those Fanfiction loonies enough to do whatever you say.

Mobster: Yes, but I have a better hostage. *pulls Artemis’s favorite blanket out of pocket and holds it over pool of acid*

Artemis: NOOOO!!!!!! NOT MY BLUE BLANKET!!!!!!

Mobster: Yes. *chuckles evilly* Now are you ready to deal?

Artemis: *sniffles* Yes.

Mobster: What you have to do is…

Wishes: *hidden in corner, whispering to self and videotaping* Everyone else is going to LOVE this.

Mobster: Dance around in your underpants and sing this song. *hands Artemis lyrics to Gir Song*

Artemis: What the flip is this rubbish?! I don’t even know the tune!!

Mobster: Here, we’ll play the song right now. *pulls laptop out of briefcase, looks up Gir Song on Youtube and plays it*

Artemis: I am NOT singing this!!!!

Mobster: *dangles blanket over acid pool*

Artemis: Okay, okay!!! Turn on the song!!!

Mobster: You forgot the ‘underpants’ part.

Artemis: *grumbles and takes off outer clothing*

Mobster: Happy dancing. And I’m not going to turn on the song, you get to sing it without musical backup.

Artemis: *starts halfheartedly dancing*

Mobster: Come on, dance with gusto!

Artemis: OKAY, OKAY!!! *dancing around in underpants and singing loudly*

My name is Gir,
Here’s my cupcake,
it’s always here,
When I’m awake!
I like to sing,
A doomy song,
it’s better than,
wearing a thong!
I like to dance,
to DDR,
I go to raves,
I am a star!
I must obey
the taco man,
but not destroy,
Zim’s master plan!
Because I am Gir,
And G stands for, I don’t know!
And I got chocolate bubblegum
And watch the scary monkey show!
If I could explode,
That would be great,
With bacon soap,
And moosie fate!
It is the Irkins
I represent,
But I am tight,
With 50 Cent!

NOW LET ME OUT OF HERE YOU PSYCHOPATH!!!!

Mobster: *falling over laughing* That’s not part of the song!

Artemis: AAAAAARGH!!!! *puts regular clothes back on and runs out door*

Wishes: *hits stop on video recorder* I better get back to Fowl Manor now!!

LATER THAT DAY, IN YOSHI’S ROOM…

Ally Kat: Did you get the video? Didja didja didja?

Wishes: I got the video! But I think we shouldn’t ever mention this to Artemis! He might strangle us!

Ally Kat: Well, put it in!!!!

Wishes: *puts video in video player and turns on TV*

Everyone: *watching video in awe*

Wishes: *as video ends* Cool or what?

Everyone else: *in shock* That was…

Wishes: What?

Everyone else except Yoshi: THE BEST REVENGE EVER!!!

Yoshi: What is WRONG with you people?!

Everyone else: *staring in shock at Yoshi*

Toushiro: There is something very wrong going on with Yoshi……page…Yoshi: There’s nothing wrong with me!

Toushiro: You’re right, and that’s what scares me.

Yoshi:….

Wishes: Only one way to see how bad it truly is. *dangles left sock foot in front of Yoshi*

Yoshi: I no longer feel the urge to steal left socks…

Everyone else: *shocked*

Flare: We need to get you in to see a doctor, right away!!!

Sora Cullen Butler: I know one, from my blue-diamond training. He lives up in the mountains, and mostly keeps to himself. But he specializes in re-crazification.

Kagome: But how are we going to get there??

Ally Kat: I think Wishes has a golf cart sitting outside.

Wishes: That’s right. It’ll take us there.

Yoshi: A golf cart will take us from here to the mountains of Japan??

Wishes: Yes. You’ll see.

Everyone: *goes outside and gets into golf cart*

Toushiro: Jeez, this thing’s small…

Wishes: Everybody on? Okay then… *pushes magic button*

Everyone: *teleports to Japanese mountain, next to creepy old shack*

Yoshi:…

Ally Kat: You okay, Yoshi?

Yoshi: ….Can’t hold on to craziness much longer…

Sora Cullen Butler: Don’t worry, this’ll only take a second. *walks up to door and knocks*

Spongebob: *answers door* Visitors!

Yoshi: Okay, that’s it. *tries to walk away*

Ally Kat: Oh no you don’t!!! *grabs the back of Yoshi’s shirt* You’re staying right here!!!

Spongebob: So, this looks like an acute case of uncrazification. There’s only one cure. *goes back inside*

Kagome: Sora, you could have told us that the healer is Spongebob…

Sora Cullen Butler: *shrugs* You didn’t ask.

Spongebob: *comes back outside* Here we are. *hands Krabby Patty to Yoshi*

Yoshi: Ooh, a burger. *eats Krabby Patty*

Everyone else: *waiting expectantly*

Yoshi: Now, where was I? *steals Spongebob’s left sock*

Everyone else: HOORAY!!!

Toushiro: How long do the effects of the Krabby Patty last?

Spongebob: Well, it’s permanent if it’s a re-crazification. It lasts twenty-four hours if the person never was crazy.

Ally Kat: Why do you ask, Toushiro?

Toushiro: Well, just think of the mischief we could cause.

Sora Cullen Butler: We could feed one to Artemis…

Yoshi: An entertaining idea…

Vera: Or we could tell Butler we made it ourselves and give him one!!!

Kagome: That would be risky and hilarious at the same time.

Wishes: Or maybe we could give one to Myles and sic him on Artemis…

Yoshi: Let’s figure this out back at Fowl Manor! Hey, Spongebob, how many patties can you spare?

Spongebob: Well, I only have three on hand… *hands Yoshi burgers*

Yoshi: Three sounds good. Now, let’s get back to Fowl Manor…

Fanfiction peeps: *grin evilly* …page…

BACK AT FOWL MANOR…

Yoshi: So, what do we do with them?

Ally Kat: One has to go to Artemis. Has to.

Kagome: Beckett is already crazy, but Myles would be a wonderful help.

Yoshi: Butler may very well be too dangerous to crazify.

Wishes: Safety is dull. Butler gets one.

Vera: How do we get them to eat them?

Toushiro: We can threaten Artemis if he won’t eat it.

Sora Cullen Butler: People are hooked after one bite. We can force him to take a single bite, after that he’ll eat of his own accord. Butler can taste tranquilizer, so he’ll be more likely to try it. And Myles will likely eat it regardless.

Yoshi: Sounds like we have a plan. Let’s put it in action.

Everyone: *troops out*

Myles: *walks up* What is everyone doing? And why are you looking at me like that?

Yoshi: *shoves Krabby Patty in Myles’s hand* Eat this and don’t ask why.

Myles: Oooookay…. *eats Krabby Patty*

Everyone else: *waits expectantly*

Myles: Whoa, I feel weird. It’s as if my outlook on life is completely turned around. *draws psychopathic banana on Artemis’s door*

Kagome: Can you make sure Butler eats this? *hands Myles another Krabby Patty*

Myles: Certainly. *pulls shrike throwing knives from pocket and stalks down hallway*

Ally Kat: Where the HECK did he get those throwing knives?

Flare: Comes with the territory. He’s a wonkie now, remember.

Kagome: *grins evilly* Let’s go get Artemis.

LATER, IN ARTEMIS’S ROOM…

Sora Cullen Butler: Hands up!

Artemis: Not you guys again. What is it this time?

Yoshi: Eat this. *stuffs Krabby Patty in Artemis’s mouth*

Artemis: MMMMMMFF!!! *swallows Krabby Patty whole* What was that about?

Ally Kat: Here’s the test. *hands Artemis shurikens*

Artemis: Great! *throws shurikens in perfect timing at a target on the wall and gets a bullseye every time*

Yoshi: He’s wonkie all right.

Ally Kat: What… have we wrought? …page…

Artemis: *grins evilly* I tried to be fair in my revenge. You just HAD to retaliate. I will deliberate for a time, and meanwhile I would suggest living in fear of me. *stalks off*

Fanfiction peeps: *raise eyebrows*

Yoshi: Well, THAT was something. Let’s go find Myles and Butler.

Everyone: Cool. *walk off*

Myles: *comes barreling down the hallway* Butler turned psycho!!!

Flare: That’s what’s supposed to have happened.

Myles: He’s teaming up with Artemis to plan revenge on you!!!

Kagome: All the more fun for us when they fail.

Myles: AND HE GAVE ME A WEDGIE!!! *rubs backside*

Yoshi: Hmm. We shall have to find a way to thwart that.

LATER…

Butler: *ambushes Yoshi* Ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!! *tries to give her wedgie*

Yoshi: There’s this new thing, you may not have heard of it. It’s called WEARING A ONE-PIECE SWIM SUIT UNDER YOUR CLOTHES!!! *pulls up shirt to reveal a blue swim suit*

Butler: Argh! That is unwedgieable!!!

Yoshi: So there. Was that the extent of your plan?

Butler: Nooo…. I was planning to evilly cackle and run off once I was done with your wedgie, but it didn’t work, so…

Yoshi: You’re saying Artemis doesn’t have a plan yet? *is thinking this is good news*

Butler: Oh, he does. It’s just taking him a bit to set up.

Yoshi: D’Arvit! *runs off to notify the other wonkies*

LATER, IN YOSHI’S ROOM…

Yoshi: May this meeting come to disorder. *smacks table with gavel* We have a serious situation on our hands. We have approximately twenty-three hours until Artemis is sane again, and he already has an intricate plan. Anyone have any ideas?

Toushiro: Um, hows about we find OUT the plan and turn it against him?

Yoshi: How the heck are we going to find out his plans without his knowing it?

Sora: Maybe we can get Juliet to keep surveillance on him.

Artemis: *from the shadows* Maybe you can give up now and pray for mercy.

Ally Kat: Uh oh….. …page…

Fanfiction peeps: GET HIM!!! *all charge toward Artemis and tackle him*

Artemis: AAAAAAAA!!!! *disappears under a pile of deranged fangirls*

Yoshi: *sits on Artemis’s stomach* What was that about praying for mercy?

Artemis: *yells at the door* ANY TIME NOW!!!

Butler: *comes in and throws net over Fanfiction peeps and Artemis*

Flare: Ooookay, that may not have been the most brilliant thing we’ve ever done, on the whole.

Ally Kat: Ya think? *futilely pushes against net*

Artemis: Butler, you kind of need to work on your aim. *looks nervously at horde of fangirls*

Butler: Oh, right. *lifts up net in a very small section so Artemis can climb out, and blocks the fangirls*

Sora: Man, this is squished.

Toushiro: Where’s a latecomer when you need one?

Shadowsnake and Silversong: *tap at window from outside*

Myles: *peeks in the door, then runs over to the window and opens it*

Shadowsnake: Thanks, Myles. We were waiting out there for a while before we finally climbed the tree.

Silversong: What happened over there in the shadows that really shouldn’t be there, considering that this is a bedroom and not a clichรฉ?

Yoshi: Urm, any time you want to realize it’s us would be perfect.

Shadowsnake and Silversong: ๐Ÿ˜ฏ *run over and haul off the net*

Vera: Took you long enough. *stands up*

Fanfiction peeps: *get up and walk out of the shadows*

Wishes: Now… WHERE’S THAT MUD BOY?!?!?

Myles: He went that way. *points down hallway*

Fanfiction peeps: *run down hallway while simultaneously pulling out all their weapons*

Shadowsnake and Silversong: Chaaaaaaaaaaaaarge!!!

Fanfiction peeps: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!! *scream as the floor opens up under them and they fall into a deep abyss*

…page…
Fanfiction peeps: *fall into a giant bucket with a giant whomping noise*

Yoshi: Mental note. Never fall with weapons unsheathed. *winces at bruise left by flamethrower*

Ally Kat: That Mud Boy is so dead. *scoots to the side of the bucket*

Toushiro: Okay, maybe that Krabby Patty wasn’t the best idea.

Shadowsnake: Do I want to know what you guys have been up to?

Vera: It’s a long, weird tale. Maybe later when we’re not in a huge bucket that doesn’t belong in any sane person’s story.

Shadowsnake: Okey doke. *tries to climb the sides of the bucket and epically fails*

Flare: *tries to burn through the bucket and ends up singeing more than one pair of eyebrows*

Yoshi: Hm, I would use my super-awesome psychic Yoshi power to escape, but that would totally feel like evading the rules.

Silversong: Sometimes, you just gotta know when to evade the rules. *checks panpipes for damage*

Yoshi: Fine. *tries to use super-awesome psychic Yoshi power and faints*

Wishes: AAAAAAAHH!!! What the Fowl?!?!

Fanfiction peeps: ………

Artemis: *appears on a giant screen that the Fanfiction peeps had conveniently not noticed before* I have blocked all psychic power. You are all at my mercy.

Flare: *hurls fireball at Artemis’s image and hits him square on the nose*

Artemis: *sighs* Obviously I need to block fireballs too. *taps keys*

Flare: Oh crap. *look uncomfortable, tries to conjure fire, conjures a rice cake instead*

Artemis: I made it so that your powers are hooked to the Infinite Improbability Drive. If you try to use your powers, something freakishly unlikely happens. *tries to move so that the burn mark is not on his nose and ends up with a black singey mustache*

Yoshi: *groans and sits up* Let’s test that. *tries to use powers again*

Bucket: *turns into a giant chipmunk made of chocolate that the Fanfiction peeps are sitting on*

Fanfiction peeps: Woohoo! *start scooping up chocolate while readying weapons*

Artemis: Crap. Stupid improbability. *fiddles with some more keys* Ha!

Huge, intimidating door: *slams shut*

Artemis: I just cut off your escape!

Flare: *eats rice cake* All righty then… *attempts another fireball*

Huge, intimidating door: *turns into a Chihuahua, does a passable imitation of a Taco Bell commercial, and runs out huge, intimidating gap left by door*

Vera: I could get to like the Infinite Improbability Drive. ๐Ÿ˜ˆ

Artemis: Argh! *taps more keys*

Yoshi: Whatcha doin, Arty?

Artemis: I’m activating my own IID.

Fanfiction peeps and Artemis: *teleport to Fowl Manor roof*

Silversong: What the… *searches for panpipes and can’t find them anywhere*

Ally Kat: My katana is gone!

Yoshi: My flamethrower didn’t come with me! ๐Ÿ˜ฏ

Fanfiction peeps: *are all missing their weapons* D’Arvit….

Artemis: Uh oh. *is missing his cell phone and his tie*

Yoshi: Jeez Artemis, you’re not dangerous at all.

Artemis: Shut up. Somebody needs to get us off the roof.

Flare: *tries to conjure fireball*

The Sun: *turns into a giant, glowing orange*

Wishes: Well, crap. That certainly epic-failed.

Myles: *from ground* Hey! What just happened?

Kagome: Yoshi! Psychic power!

Yoshi: Fine. *uses super-awesome psychic Yoshi power*

Fanfiction peeps and Artemis: *teleport to The Room Of The Authority Supreme On Randomness*

Sora: Well, what are we doing here?

Important-looking dude dressed as a duck: You have been summoned here today for overuse of an Infinite Improbability Drive. We’re in the process of trying to come up with what we should do to you.

Yoshi: Is it gonna be random?

I-l d d a a d: Improbably.ย  *presses a button with a skull on it*

Fanfiction peeps (still including Artemis): Craaaaaaaap! *teleport to…

Fowl Manor*

Toushiro: My weapons are back! *pats pockets appreciatively*

Flare: *successfully conjures a fireball*

Yoshi: *waves flamethrower in the air*

Artemis: In light of what has happened, I’m willing to call a truce until tomorrow.

Yoshi: Fine. Until tomorrow, then.

More…

THE NEXT DAY, IN YOSHI’S ROOM…

Yoshi: *speaking to gathered wonkies*ย  The truce is officially up, and we still have scores to settle. Any ideas?

Shadow: Plenty. Is Arty-chan still asleep?

Kagome: I checked, he’s out like a light. Speaking of lights, his was on at two in the morning, so I think he’s gonna sleep for a while.

Shadow: Perrrrfect…

TWO MINUTES LATER, IN ARTEMIS’S ROOM…

Flare: *is holding shaving cream and a feather*

Wishes: *is holding permanent marker*

Ally Kat: *is holding multiple alarm clocks*

Shadow: Here we are. ๐Ÿ˜ˆ Marker first. *grabs marker and draws a mustache, a pair of bushy eyebrows, a mole, a goatee, and Harry Potter glasses on Artemis’s face*

Flare: *puts shaving cream on Artemis’s other palm, puts it face-up on the bed, and gets ready to tickle Artemis’s nose with the feather*

Ally Kat: *is hiding the alarm clocks in multiple spots in Artemis’s room and setting the alarms five minutes apart*

Comments on This Post

375 responses to “A Tale of Betrayal and Randomness.” Join in!

  1. hitsugayatoushiro May 27th, 2009 at 1:23 pm 1

    HAHAHAH THAT WAS AWESOME. FCD
    HOW DO U RYT LYK THAT?
    ALL UR STORIES R GR8!

  2. LOLZ. The title fits perfectly. Awesome story!!!

  3. LOLZ!!!! FIVE STARS!!

  4. Are you gonna upadte? It’s pretty good.

  5. This is not my oppinion but Artemis says:

    This is redicules! (Though slightly amusing.) Holly would never do something like that and… *whack*

    I just knocked Arty unconcious. ANYHOO! I love it! Update soon! 5/5 stars!

  6. Opal Koboi Rocks May 29th, 2009 at 1:52 am 6

    HAHAHAhahahahahaHAHAHAHHAHAHAH!

  7. OMG!!!!!!!!!!!! SUPRE FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ( go opal!)

  8. UPDATE!!!!!!!!!!!!

  9. UPDATE! Oh and I bet my Pikachu impression is better than you Yoshi impression! *does perfect Pikachu impression* BEAT THAT 1!

  10. Face it, Ally Kat, Yoshi would kick Pikachu’s yellow butt ten times out of ten. Besides, I’m an expert Yoshi imitator. Ask any of my best buds from South Vermillion. Watch and learn!

    *does mind-blowingly accurate Yoshi impression* What now!

  11. Oh yeah? Well play me at Super smash bros melee and I’ll kick Yoshi’s green butt with Zelda or Pikachu! I rule that game so hard! *does such a super awesome Pikachu impression the people around me heads explode* WHAT NOW LOSA?

  12. Oh, it’s ON!! I would so rock you. I am the ultimate ruler of that game. *does Yoshi impression so super amazing that it turns the sky black and it rains Dr. Pepper* You is gonna go down so bad, you will go down through infinite expanses of space and land on your butt exactly where you were before I pwned you. And just for calling me a losa, I will pwn you using Kirby too.

    P.S. I always use a light blue Yoshi! Not green! What now?!?!

  13. OH YEAH YOU ARE SOOOO PWNED! *does Butler impression so awesome that it hails dark chocolate then does Pikachu impressions so wicked awesome that world hunger ends* BEAT THAT SUCKA! Oh and I own Zelda man! You cannot beat me when I’m Zelda, Sumas, or Pikachu! FACE MY WRATH! YOU ARE SOOOO PWND! And you know what we should make rivaling stories about this and do an inside contest and ask the people here who’s is better! Once again, YOU ARE SOOOOOOO PWNED WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU!!!! *hits Yoshi over the head with a hardcover book* I’M GONNA KICK YOSHI’S BLUE BUTT! AND KIRBY YOU ARE GOIN DOWN!!!!!

  14. Uh-huh. Just keep tellin’ yourself that. *puts hands on hips* And you think your impressions rock. *does Juliet impression so good it reverberates around the world and makes everyone bow down to it* and your Pikachu impression? *does Yoshi impression that is so freakin’ awesome that it splits open the ground and magically fills the crack with gummy bears* And I’m game for the rivaling stories. But what are the rules, and what does this have to do with Artemis?

  15. Okay rules.

    1. No making yourself win. People who read it vote on who wins the Brawl tournament in the stories
    2. Let the people vote on who has the best story over all
    3. You MUST put a Fowl character in as a new character in Brawl like a noob.
    4. It can be with Brawl or Melee
    5. You can put in TWO other people from here not including ourselves

    And that’s all the rules I can come up with and rule 4 says how it’s related to Artemis Fowl. tell me if you have any rules to add or if one doesn’t make sense. *in perfect Link impression* How come we care who’s impressions is better than who’s? *in absolutely PERFECT Artemis impression that can’t be beaten by anyone* After all it’s just a dumb thing we’re doing over the INTERNET where no one can even hear the darn things!

  16. You’re on!! And about the impression quality — *Matches Ally Kat’s Artemis impression’s quality exactly* It’s simply a psychological habit neurotypical people have to prove their superiority.

  17. Okay! Okay! I lose the impression competition between us! Jeez ya don’t have to rub it in! We do the story tomorrow, okay? I’m to tired to write anything right now so I’ll start mine in the morning.

  18. Fine by me. *addresses crowd* Anybody want to be in either story? If so, put down your choice of Brawl character. The tournament is May 31st, so if it’s past that date don’t bother to ask. If no one signs up, I’ll just pick random peeps and fitting characters. So fire away!

  19. Well you HAVE to put me in your but you still have two other peeps that can be in.

  20. ME ME ME!!!!!!

  21. hitsugayatoushiro May 31st, 2009 at 2:01 pm 22

    NO WAY INUYASHA!!!
    PUT MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE INNIT!!!!!!!!!
    MA CHARACTERS WAAAAAAAAAY MORE INTRESTIN THAN kagome’s

  22. I’ll put both of you in!! Toushiro, you’re already in it, I thought you would probably enjoy being in it. Inuyasha, I’m adding you right now. Can either of you pick your characters so I can get mah peeps right?

  23. And P.S. I’m doing Melee instead of Brawl, because the only game I know anything about is Melee. So pick Melee characters!!

  24. I want to be… Link. But make it clear that I’m a girl!!!!! Link is the only guy with a sword. If there’s a girl a with a sword i’ll be her though.

  25. Okey doke. Toushiro, I have you down as Zelda, immediately becoming Sheik, b’cuz you haven’t said anything about who you want to be and I figure that Sheik fits you best. Stop me if I’m horribly wrong!

  26. hitsugayatoushiro May 31st, 2009 at 4:55 pm 27

    NO WAY I’D LUV 2 B SHEIK.

  27. YAY!! P.S. Which one would like 2 b Butler when he becomes a new character??

  28. hitsugayatoushiro May 31st, 2009 at 5:00 pm 29

    WAT DO U MEAN?

  29. ME!!!!! but can you make it Juliet? I don’t want to be a guy at all really.

  30. hitsugayatoushiro May 31st, 2009 at 5:03 pm 31

    NO WAY THE BEST BUTLER IS DOMOVOI ND UR SOOOOOOO FUSSY. I’M A GIRL ND I DNT MIND BEIN POTRAYED AS A BOY.

  31. Listen I don’t have anything against butler(well maybe a tiny grudge)but Juliet is way ore awesome and she’s one of the ONLY girls in the entire series that plays some kind of part through the books!

  32. hitsugayatoushiro May 31st, 2009 at 5:08 pm 33

    AAAAGH BUT DOMOVOI IS
    SOOOOOOOOOOOOO

    KKKKK
    OOOOO
    OOOOO
    LLLLLLL
    !!!!!!!!!!

  33. So? Juliet is kooler.

  34. Tough decision… I agree that the awesomest Butler is Domovoi, but Inuyasha asked first… Hmm… Okay, whoever is a Butler has to win the first battle and lose first in the second. And whoever asks first takes all. P.S. Inuyasha, do you want to go by Inuyasha or Kagome?

  35. Kagome! I go by Kagome! And I will be Juliet!!!!!!

  36. I don’t mean anything against Juliet! But Butler is just so crazy awesome. He took out a whole Retrieval team alone and still stands as the only human to ever beat a troll!! Tell me that’s not cool!!

  37. Okay, okay. You shall be Juliet! And I already have you down as Kagome, so I guess there’s no problem there.

  38. hitsugayatoushiro May 31st, 2009 at 5:17 pm 39

    ITS FINE WITH ME!!!

  39. *snickers* Juliet rules almost as hard as Opal. I would’ve asked to be Opal but juliet is better for SSBM or SSBB.

  40. hitsugayatoushiro May 31st, 2009 at 5:27 pm 41

    YEA I KNO WAT U MEAN BUT INSTEAD OF OPAL I’D B MYLES FOWL COZ EVN THO HIS LIL HIS SUPA KOOL!!! LOL! ๐Ÿ™‚

  41. I would be Holly. Unfortunately, she wouldn’t be able to fly around in SSBM or SSBB. I would love to see a story where SSB- chars met AF chars…

  42. hitsugayatoushiro June 2nd, 2009 at 5:55 pm 43

    I KNO IT’S B SOOOOOOO FUNNY
    WEN R U GONNA START 2 WRITE?

  43. I’m already starting writing, altho all the ideas I’ve come up with are crappy, according to my little sister. I’m not sure she really knows enough to tell me that, but hey, I’m as paranoid as Foaly when it comes to my writing. I started writing ‘Hide and Seek with Opal Koboi’ sometime in March. That’s how paranoid I am.

  44. hitsugayatoushiro June 2nd, 2009 at 6:55 pm 45

    K I’M GETTIN THE IMPRESSION 6THAT UR 1 PAONOID GIRL BUT DNT LISTEN 2 EVRYTHIN UR SIS SAYZ

  45. Dang. I’m almost done with chappy one. And I’m doing another story along with it that I’m not gonna put up till it’s almost done sometime this month, but that’s completly irrevelevant isn’t it? Anyway have you ever read a book called Savvy? *everyone around me stares like I’m crazy* Well go read it now. coughitsgonnabeacrossoverforthenewstorycough.
    Well the crossover anyway. NOT our little challenge!

  46. hitsugayatoushiro June 2nd, 2009 at 7:04 pm 47

    who’s it by?
    i’ll chek it out now

  47. Savvy? It’s by Ingrid Law.

  48. I’m doing another story at the same time too, it’s gonna be called ‘Deja Vu: A Fowl Occurence’. Hopefully I will be done soon!!

    P.S. Just b’cuz my idea is dumb doesn’t mean I haven’t been working on it. It’s actually pretty much done, except for some grammar and making the idea seem more believable (WAY more believable). Right now it seems like an idea a third-grader would daydream about.

  49. ArtemisFowlfan96 June 2nd, 2009 at 11:26 pm 50

    SO funny!!! Continue!

  50. hitsugayatoushiro June 3rd, 2009 at 8:04 pm 51

    RYT I CNT WAIT TILL IT COMZ OUT COZ I NEED A GOOD LAUGH @ THE MOMENT. I’VE STILL GOT 7 EXAMS LEFT TO DO @ SKOOL ND I’M MENT 2 B REVISIN. MA COMPS IN THE LIVIN ROOM ND EVRY 5 MINS MA MUMZ LYK ‘AINT U MENT 2 B REVISIN?’

  51. can you put me in this story? I could rat you out then you rat me out for sending letter bombs and a Pokemon army to Artemis. Oh and for crashing Foaly’s computer(It’s one of my fave pastimes)!

  52. I’ll do my best. But hey, I’m secretly the general of the Pokemon army, so that one I’ll maybe be careful ratting you out on. LOL. I also apologize for the half-chapter thing. My mom kicked me off the computer for a while in the middle of it.

  53. JUST UPDATE SOON! Like within the next hour would be nice!

  54. LOL ON THE UPDATE!!! I luv how everyone’s so shocked about it! Mind if I tell you what I would say nexy?

    Ally Kat: What? It’s fun! And Artemis it’s not like I’m crashing YOUR computer, I only hack yours!

    TA DA! You don’t have to use it! Crazy idea fuled off of to much sugar, AGAIN!

  55. UPDATE NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  56. Okay, okay, okay!!! I shall update!!!

  57. UPDATE NOW!!!!! Or else…

  58. Okay I got ma next line 4 ya. The only reason I do this is so I won’t have to ’cause you’ll get me perfectly after a few more line givers, ‘kay?

    Ally Kat: *pulls out laptop and hacks Arty’s computer* YES! THE PEOPLE AT FAN FICTION WILL BE SOOOO HAPPY TO HEAR THIS!

    Artemis: Hear what?

    Ally Kat: YOU LOVE HOLLY!!! *dances around the room and kisses Arty* Tee hee.

  59. Put me in too! I hate Artemis with a firey passion and willl try and kill him!!!! *takes out Rose Whip*

  60. SoraCullenWhite June 12th, 2009 at 7:36 pm 62

    UPDATE!

  61. UPDATE! AND PUT ME IN!

  62. Okay, okay! *runs away from angry mob that is chanting the word ‘update’* I don’t think I’ll put in the bit about Arty loving Holly, though. I’m not an A/H shipper, I just hate Minerva with a fiery passion that will never die. I will try to put you in too, Kagome.

    ~Yoshi~

  63. And me too! Please!!!!!

  64. UPDATE ASAP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

  65. UPDATE SOON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  66. hitsugayatoushiro June 13th, 2009 at 5:19 pm 68

    THAT WAS HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    HAHAHA ARTEMIS BEIN AFRAID OF LOLLIPOPS ND READIN ALL OUR FICS!!

  67. U HAVE TO UPDATE!!!!!!!!!!!

  68. *starts chanting update with seven million other people* YOU HAVE TO UPDATE OR ELSE WE’LL BURN YOUR HOUSE, MAKE YOUR COMPUTER EXPLODE, AND KILL ARTEMIS FOWL! UPDATE!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh no! Someone’s already seting ur house on fire! STOP YOU MORON! GIVE HER TIME TO UPDATE!
    Random dude setting fire to Yoshi’s house: THEN MAKE HER UPDATE THEN!
    Me: JUST STOP IT YOU MORON AND OUT OUT THE FIRE!
    Random dude setting fire to Yoshi’s house: Fine. *splashes water on small bit of house that was on fire*

  69. hitsugayatoushiro June 13th, 2009 at 6:25 pm 71

    HAHAHA CAN I BURN HER HOUSE WITH U AS I CANT BLOW UP UR NANS HOUSE?

  70. u already blew it up… CHECK THE UPDATE OF MY BLOG!

  71. hitsugayatoushiro June 13th, 2009 at 6:33 pm 73

    YEA I JUS CHEKED IT…..HAHA I’M SOOO EVIL…

  72. grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr… I’m getting testy here. HEY RANDOM DUDE SET FIRE TO TO THE HOUSE!
    Random due: Okay! *sets fire to Yoshi’s house*
    Me: Now will you update? *puls out seashell sword and puts it to Arty’s throat*
    Arty: HELP ME! THIS PHYCO IS GOING TO KILL ME!
    Me: SHUT UP ARTY!!! UPDATE NOW YOSHI OR ARTY DIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  73. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH GOD HELP ME THERE’S CRAZY PEPUL TRYING TO BURN DOWN MY HOUSE AND KILL ARTY FOWL!! HELP ME BUTLER!! HELP ME JULIET!! HELP ME PEX AND CHIPS!!

    I think I’ll go update now…

  74. Me: Good idea!
    Arty: Help me…
    Me: SHUT UP ARTY!
    Arty: *whimpers*
    Me: I kinda like eing the bad guy. Tee hee.

  75. I updated based on YOUR THREATS!!! I HOPE YOU’RE HAPPY!!!!

  76. Me: Yeah I am. *releses Arty*
    Arty: *runs off mumbling to self* Why nis it every other day one of thoes fan fiction freaks kidnaps me and tries to kill me?
    Me: *calls after Arty* CAUSE WE LOVE YOU! Oh and thanks for the update. Sorry I got a little caried away. and sorry for burning down your house…

  77. Oh, that’s okay, if you’ll accept my apology for kicking you out of your house and moving in. That’s for a future update, of course. Oh, and thanx for finding Arty. *kidnaps Artemis*

  78. …I can’t wait to see that update…

  79. *uses mesmer on Yoshi*
    Your going to update today. Your going to update this again in less than two hours.
    All of us at fan fiction will die unless you update.
    *stops using mesmer*

  80. *mesmerized* Yes, master.

  81. kool it worked

  82. Okay i got another line for no apperant reason right now.

    Ally Kat: Artemis is Foaly teaching my computer therapy? If so… well I’m as good as Foaly’s daughter! FOALY WILL ADOPT ME!

  83. hitsugayatoushiro June 14th, 2009 at 10:41 am 85

    POOR YOSHI!
    DNT WORRY I READ THE BOOK ‘FIRE FIGHTIN FOR AMUTURES!’ I THINK I CAN PUT OUT UR HOUSE

  84. *uses mesmer again*
    You will update again today.
    You will update within the hour.
    You will update within the half hour.
    You will update right now.
    *stops using mesmer*

  85. *mesmerized* Yes, master Kagome.

    AK, that is not a way to get me to update. There are a few ways to get me to update.

    1.) Ask nicely.

    2.) Ask with Butler ready to pound me into fraggle juice if I don’t listen to you.

    3.) Ask while using the mesmer.

    4.) Ask while holding Arty hostage.

    5.) Have Arty ask.

    Notice how yelling is not a way to get me to update. However, I will anyway b’cuz Kagome used #3.

  86. ‘kay. From now on I’ll use #2 and 4. Tee hee I’m evil! *grabs Arty at gunpoint* Now will you update?
    Arty: WHY ME?!?!?!?!?!?!
    Me: SHUT UP YOU MORON!
    Arty: *swallows hard* Please update this stupid story. I really don’t want to die today.
    Me: Listen to the moron. Update.

  87. *laughs* I admire your determination. I’m updating right now, actually. And that is using #2, 4, AND 5. Not that it matters much. I’LL SAVE YOU ARTY!!!

  88. Me: No you won’t. You don’t know where we are.
    Arty: *is scared out of his wits* Please help me!
    Me: SHUT UP STUPID IRISH BOY! *slaps Arty*
    Arty: *nodds vigirously as he stares at my gun*
    Butler: *walks in*
    Me: *mesmerizes Butler* Stay away butler. Oh and Yoshi now that i have Butler mesmerized that’s another eason to update ’cause I’ll have him beat you to a pulp if you don’t!
    Arty: SOMEONE PLEASE SAVE ME! WE’RE AT MINERVA’S VACATION HOUSE IN CANADA!
    Me: I said shut up! *pulls out sword*

  89. Thnx 4 da upd8! *releses Arty and leaves Minnie’s vacation house* I can’t wait for the next one! If you don’t update(again)I’ll make Minnie imortal! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!
    U kno i’m JK ryt? i’m jst ๐Ÿ™‚ u upd8d!

  90. ARTEMIS FOWL YOUR A *beep beep beep beep* MICKEY MOUSE *beep beep beep beep beep beeeeeeeeeep* TROLL AND A *beeeeeep beep beep beep beep* WITH NO CHANCE OF *beeeeeeeep beep beep beep beep* WITH YOSHI *beeeeeeep beep beep beeeeeeeeeeeeeeep beep* ICARLY *beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep* HARRY POTTER LOVING *beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep* WITH A BUCKET OF * beep beep beep beepty beep beep* HIPPOPATAS *beep beep beep* POKEMON LOVER *beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep* SOUP *beep beep beep* TRAGOONA *beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep* ALAKAZAM!!!!!!! THANK YOU HPPP WIZARD SWEARS!

  91. Me: Umm…. Kagome, are you okay? Did you blow a fuse or something??

    Artemis: No, she didn’t. I was able to translate that using my new invention. KAGOME, I AM NOT!!!!

    Me: …I’m not even going to ask what she called you. I am curious about my part in it, though, why she mentioned my name.

    Artemis: I don’t think she liked our little drama on Minerva Survey.

    Me: *chuckles* Me neither. She’s just lucky I don’t incorporate that into ATOBAR. HEAR THAT, KAGOME??

    Kagome: YOSHI, YOU’RE A PILE OF *beep buhbeep* WITH *bebeeepbeep* SAUCE *beeep* SPONGEBOB *bleeeep* MUNCHLAX *buhBEEP* WITH A TOPPING OF *beeeeep beep beep* WITH A CHERRY ON TOP!!!!

  92. *steals Arty*
    Me: UPDATE OR YOU’LL NEVER SEE THE IRISH BOY AGAIN AND BUTLER WILL BEAT YOU TO A PULP!
    Butler: I’ll only do it because she has Artemis. So I sugest you update.
    Arty: PLEASE SAVE ME! SHE HAD BUTLER MESMERIZED AND THERE’S A GUN TO MY HEAD!!!
    Me: *uses mesmer* Update Yoshi. Please update!
    Arty: Just update and I might live. PLEASE UPDATE OR I MIGHT DIE!!!!!!!!

  93. Me: ARTY I’LL SAVE YOU!!! B’CUZ IF YOU DIE I WILL HAVE NO REASON TO LIVE!!!!

    Artemis: Just update for goodness’ sake before Butler pounds you into fraggle juice!!!

    Me: Okay!! *starts updating*

  94. IwishIwasafaerie June 16th, 2009 at 12:24 am 97

    Awsome!It’s my dream to see Arty and crew! The Minerva thing was awsome too! Tell Minerva I said: Leave Arty alone, shup up and geta life!*laughs* *random chair spinning*

  95. hitsugayatoushiro June 16th, 2009 at 4:56 pm 98

    W-O-W!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    I GET 2 GO 2 ARTY’S 4 CRAZY NINJA PERSON THERAPY????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

    YAY NOW I’M GLAD THAT I BCAME A CRAZY NINJA WHO SPEAKS JAPANESE, FRENCH AND SPANISH 4 ABSOLOUTELY NO REASON 4 WAT SO EVA!!!

  96. hitsugayatoushiro June 16th, 2009 at 5:05 pm 99

    YEA COZ Hyร…ยrinmaru’S A ICE-DRAGON HE CAN TRANSPORT ANT FORM OF WATER FROM 1 PLACE TO ANOTHER ND AS HIS A PART 0F TOUSHI’S SOUL HE CAN USE IT!!!!! LOL

    ND HOLLY I USED MA SEKAI GATE, THE KEYS ROUND MA NEK ND NO 1 BUT THOSE WHO CAN C US SHINIGAMIS CAN C THEM. THAT’S Y U DIDN’T C ME APPEAR FRM MA SEKAI GATE!!!

    HAHAHA I CAN B ANYWER I WAN WEN EVA I WANT!!!!

    APPEARS BEHIND ARTY

    ARTY: *JUMPS* CRAP WER DID U COM FRM!!!????
    ME:*DISSAPEARS AGAIN* U NEVA KNO WER I’LL END UP…..MAYB UR STUDY OR MAYB UR SECRET JECUZZI………..?

  97. SoraCullenWhite June 18th, 2009 at 1:56 am 100

    Hey can you put me in? I would be at Fowl manor when they get there trying to find Butler. Oh and a little bit about me. My REAL name is Sora Cullen Butler so that’s why I would be trying to find Domovoi and Juliet… Soooooo ya. That all you need to know about me. Oh and I have my blue diamond and I’m only 12!

  98. *gives surprised look to Sora Cullen Butler* You have your blue diamond?! Impressive. Okay, I’ll put you in, though the story’s getting crowded. *chuckles* This got a lot more popular than I thought it would. It’s getting complicated!!

  99. I’m from Japan just so you know! Oh and UPDATE OR DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *pulls out anime army caller*

  100. I’m from America too. I also speak Italian, Spanish, French, Japanese, and German! Oh and I have a perfect English accent so Arty wouldn’t be able to tell where I’m from!

  101. Please update soon!

  102. Hey Yoshi remember that contest thing we set up with each other a while back? The Super Smash Bros one? Well lets put thoes out before the month is over and get this private conetest thingy started already! It doesn’t have to be finished but one complet chapter would be nice. We can officaly end the contest one whoes is better at the end of July. Okay? I’ll have mine out later today or tommorow. I hope to see yours soon!

  103. IwishIwasafaerie June 21st, 2009 at 3:27 am 106

    Awesome randomness! My favorite type of comedy. Here’s what I would do if Holly forgot my name:
    Holly:”Come on human.”
    Me:”I have a name. How come Artemis gets a name and I don’t? After all, I just thought you were awesome and he KIDNAPPED you! Seriously, why does he get a name?! Is it because he’s a good kisser?”*Realizes what I just said*”Oh my god, is he!?”
    H(Holly):*turns red*”Uh, well…..OF COURSE NOT!!!”
    Artemis:”Hey, I was nearly unconscous! You don’t have to be so harsh.”
    H:”Oh, Artemis, I didn’t mean…….AHHHHH!!!Mudpeople are so diffacult!”*glares at me*
    M:”Uh oh……..”
    H:”This is all your fault!”*steals sword from ninja,chops off my head*
    (Not my best idea)
    Yoshi:”So is he a good kisser?”
    H:”You wanna end up like her?”*pionts to my decapatated body*
    Y:*pulls out giant samarai sword*”I think I’ll take my chances.”
    *Minerva suddenly appears*
    Minerva:”So what are we talking about?”
    Y:”WE’RE talking about if Arty is a good kisser or not. Which you wouldn’t know!”*folds arms, looks away and pouts*
    M:”Oh yay?!”*goes over and kisses Artemis on the lips*
    Everyone:*shocked*
    A:”Opal can I have a sec?”
    Opal:*shrugs* “What the heck? All is fair in love and war.”
    A:*grabs ninja sword, slices Minerva’s head off*”That should take care of that.”
    Y:”Now back to the question.”
    H:”Who am I kidding? He’s an awesome kisser.” *kisses Artemis*
    O:”Break it up. 14 seconds is enough. I have to kill you soon. This is a children’s web site anyway.”
    *I come back from the dead and slice Opals head off*
    Me:”Party pooper. I love romance.”
    Everyone:*surprized about the kiss, but more suprised that Arty’s not surprized*
    A:”We’ve been dating for weeks.”
    Y:”But we didn’t see it on our Arty cams.”
    H:”Foaly disabled them in seconds.”
    *me and Yoshi suprised*
    Me:”But Ally Kat hacked Foaly’s computer.”
    A and H:*shrugs* “Guess she disabled her own cams.”
    *Ally Kat appears*
    Ally:”What I miss?”
    Me and Yoshi:*glares*
    Me:”You disabled the Arty cams!”
    *getting ready to pounce*
    Ally:”But I went through computer-hacking therapy, remember?”
    Y:”That’s right, she’s untouchable.”
    Me:”Darn it!!!!!!!!!”

  104. Okay Yosh I got my entry for our private contest thingy out. Now it’s your turn. have ot out before the end of the month please!

  105. hitsugayatoushiro June 21st, 2009 at 9:50 am 108

    FANFIC LOONIES????????????????

    WAT?????????? YAY, THNX ANGELINE!!!!!!!!
    WE GET 2 STAY ‘ FOWL MANOR!!!! HAHAHAHA!!!!

    OOOOOOOOOOOH CAN WE ALL HIDE UNDER ARTY’S BED ND WAIT 4 HIM 2 COM 2 BED THEN WE ALL JUMP OUT ND SCARE HIM!!!????? PLZPLZPLZ?????

    I’M FRM ENGLAND ND THE ACTUAL TOUSHIRO IS FRM ANOTHA DIMENSION IN JAPAN ND LAST TIME I CHEKD NEITHER OF THEM R “NEAR” 2 AMERICA

    I PREFER JAPAN 2 ENGLAND THO!!!!!!!!!!

  106. UPDATE! AND GET YOUR PRIVATE CONTEST ENTRY OUT!!!!

  107. UPDATE OR I SWEAR I’LL KILL ARTY AND HIS GIRLFRIEND!!!!!! *puls out gun in each hand and aims and Arty and Opal*
    Opal: WTF?!?!?!?!?! I’M NOT HIS GF!!!!!
    Arty: WHY DO YOU PEOPLE ALWAYS WANT TO KILL ME?!?!!?!?!?! AND IT’S JUST A STUPID STORY! WHO CARES IF THEY UPDATE!
    Me: SHUT UP STUPID MUD BOY! AND TO ME YOU TWO SHOULD BE DATING! NOW UPDATE!!!!!!

  108. …You people are strange…

    …I am too…

    …My entry idea was the same as yours so no lopping my head off for it…

  109. please update! *usues mesmer* Update now or else. *mesmerized Butler walks in with Artemis at gun point* Now update or Butler will beat you to a pulp and Artemis will die.
    Artemis: *is scared out of his wits* P-p-please u-update this.

  110. I didn’t talk once! How dare you!!! I better be in the next chapter! Oh and I don’t get general craziness therapy, I get crazy anime therapy.

  111. Can you do something for me? Okay well two things.
    1. I want toscare Arty out of his wits by making sevral fake death threats to him with my seashell sword and pet shark Fish bait.
    2. I want one of my lines when we get cought on the next prank to be
    Ally Kat: D’Arvit! *says lots of other swears in German, Itallian, Franch, Spanish, and Jappanees*
    And I want you to have me tell Arty that I’m from America with a normal American acent even though I’d been talking in an English one. Thank you.

  112. Oh and I forgot to say, EVERYONE WHO READS THIS COMENT! YOSHI IS ONLY FIVE(four after this)COMENTS AWAY FORM BEING ON THE TOP TENS!!!!!!!!

  113. Wow! Soon you’ll be in the top tens too! Ooh that’s a tongue twister! Tops tens too is a tongue twister, tops tens too is a tongue twister, tops tens too is a tongue twister. Try sayin that three times fast! Anyway, glad to know you’ll be in the top tens soon. Oh yeah and, PLEASE UPDATE!!!!!!!

  114. *chuckles* I was expecting to be in the top tens eventually. You people never stop asking to do different things in my story or threatening Artemis. And I’m sorry, Kagome. It’s just getting confusing with all THESE PEOPLE IN IT! I will have you talk extra in the next chappie!!!

  115. *grubles* Now if you would only MAKE the the next chappy…

  116. With this coment you will oficaly be in the top tens. Congrats! Oh and Pplease put up the next chappy soon!

  117. OMG was Kagome just completly sane in a coment? AAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!11 IT’S THE END OF THE WORLD!!!!!!!

  118. Okay when Arty goes to wake up Flare just so you know she can control fire. She would probably light Arty’s suit on fire for waking her up. Tee hee me evil

  119. IwishIwasafaerie June 25th, 2009 at 12:07 am 122

    How can someone like a story so much and be sane? Answer: they can’t. Thank you, your story has burned the last small shards of strait-brainedness from me and made those shards suffer 1,000 deaths. Please, tie Mulch to a chair and feed him HANNAH MONTANNA!!!!!!!!! I’m going to keep asking until someone does it.
    p.s. Can I be in it? I’m putting you in Artemis Fowl’s Wallet, so can I be in yours?

  120. updatey soony! Oh andme is loony! I NEET TO GO TO BED BUT I DONT WANNA!!!!!!!!!!

  121. Okay, iwishiwasafaerie, but I think I’ll be needing a shorter name or nickname for you. I shall update!!! Oh and now this story is the Ninth Most Reviewed Story thanks to all you crazy people who insisted on updates from the beginning!!!

  122. Do we really have to wake up the crazy ninja?
    HOW DARE THE IRISH NINKAMPOOP CALL ME THAT???

    THNX 4 USIN MA IDEA!!!!!!!
    WEN I GO 2 HELP HIM WAKE U UP CAN I LEAD HIM 2 ANOTHA ROOM???
    LOOK CHEK THIS OUT!!!

    ME: UH UR’RE GOIN THE WRNG WAY!
    ARTY: NO THIS IS THE ROOM SHE WAS ASSIGNED TO.
    ME: IT WAS THE WRONG SHADE OF BLUE FOR HER.
    ARTY: *SHRUGS* THIS BETTA NOT B A TRAP

    WE WALK TO THE TOP FLOOR, TO THE ROOM RYT @ THE END.
    ME: COME ON IN THEN. *OPENS DOOR*
    ARTY ENTERS BUT BEFORE BUTLER CAN ENTER SOM1 BEHIND THE DOOR SHUTS IT ND LOCKS IT!!!!!!!

    THE ROOM IS FULL OF FANFIC LOONIES THAT CLIMBED THRO THE WINDOW WITH MY Japanese weapons 2 GET REVENGE COZ THEY COULDN’T SCARE THE LIVIN DAYLYT OUT OF HIM WEN HE WENT TO WAKE THEM UP!!!

    NOW U HAV ARTY IN A LOCKED ROOM WITH ALL US LOONIES, WHAT DO WE DO??

    THAT’S UP 2 U!!!

  123. Do we really have to wake up the crazy ninja?
    MA EARLIER COMMENT DDNT COM UP BUT WHO DOES THE IRISH MUD BOY THINK HE IS?

    THNX 4 USIN MA IDEA!!!! ND UR UPD8 WAS GR8..
    CHEK THIS OUT:
    ME: WER R U GOIN?
    ARTY: 2 WAKE UP THAT YOSHI GIRL.
    ME; UR GOIN THE WRNG WAY!
    ARTY: NO THIS IS THE ROOM SHE WAS ASSIGNED 2
    ME: SHE MOVED, IT WAS THE WRNG SHADE OF BLU.
    ARTY: LEAD THE WAY THN!!

    we walk to the top floor to the farthest room
    ME: COM ON THEN *ME ND ARTY ENTER BUT B4 BUTLER CAN ENTER SOM1 SHUTS THE DOOR FRM BEHIND*
    ARTY: WAT THE HELL??
    SUDDENLY THE ROOM IS FULL OF US FANFIC LOONIES, WHO CLIMBED THRU THE WINDOW USIN MA JAPANEASE WEAPONS!! THE REST IS UP2 U IF U WANNA PUT THAT IN……

  124. AAAAAAAAAGH Y R MA COMMENTS NOT COMIN THRU???????

    CHEK ON UR WRITIN PANEL ND C IF THEY CAME UP ON THAT COZ I REALLY WNT U 2 C THE IDEA I PUT UP ON IT

  125. Meep. I LOVE lollipops!!!! DIE LOLIPOP HATERS!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT THE BUGGER IS WRONG WITH ME??????? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!! I’VE TURNED INTO MY BROTHER!!!!!!!! :meep:

  126. I don’t really dislike lollipops. That was just a badly done play on the quote ‘I don’t like lollipops’. That’s why I changed to Yoshi. That and the fact that Yoshi’s supa kewl.

  127. UPDATE! RANDOMNESS IS BLISS! WHAT THE BUGGER IS WRONG WITH MY HEAD? WE’RE ALL CRAZY IN OUR OWN SEPCIAL WAY! These are some random quotes from my life. PLEASE UPDATE!!!!!!!!

  128. U HVE 2 UPD8 NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  129. I AM UPDATING!!! NO NEED TO BLOW A FUSE!!

    Blueberry muffins!!! Yum yum yum!!

    ~Yoshi~

  130. YEA ND U TELL ME THAT I NEED 2 UPD8 MORE OFTEN *GLARES DAGGERS @ YOSHI*
    HOW DO U LYK BEIN ON THE DAGGER END?

  131. You do need to update more often!!! And so do I, I admit it!!! *ducks daggers*

  132. Oh yeah, and I updated Chapter 10!!!

    So even tho there aren’t any more chappies than last time I still updated!!!

  133. You got my Foaly obbsesion just right! And nice with Flare! She is totally not a morning person! Trust me I know. She lite me on fire when I woke her up this one time and the fire department ended up getting involved… Were’s Sora anyway? We’ve only seen her in one chappy.

  134. We’ll see Sora when we get back. Actually, I have a plan to get her into therapy with us, so she won’t be as much out of the picture as she is now.

    Mmmmm, M&M’s.

  135. HOW DARE YOU DELETE CHAPPY TEN!!!!!!!!!! Exuse me I need to go kill the Irish boy. *goes off to kill Artemis*
    TEN MINUTES LATER
    *I return covered in blood and my seashell sword in hand* don’t worry I didn’t kill Arty, I killed Yoshi.

  136. *undies* I DID NOT DO THAT ON PURPOSE!!

    I CAN’T BELIEVE CHAPPY TEN IS GONE!!! MY DAD’S STUPID COMPUTER DID SOMETHING AND THEN CHAPPY TEN WAS NO MORE!!! ALL I DID WAS TRY TO PUBLISH CHAPPY ELEVEN!!!! AAAAAAAARGH!!!!

    SO DON’T KILL ME!!!! I HAVE TO GO REWRITE CHAPPY TEN AND ELEVEN!!!

  137. as long as it was an acident. THANK YOU FOR RE-PUTTING UP CHAPPY 10! THNX IN ADVANCE FOR PUTTING UP CHAPPY 11!

  138. Done with Chapter Ten… *sighs* Hope it’s not that much worse than the original. It’s the updated version, or as close as I could get. I’ll redo chappie 11 tonight.

    And Ally Kat, do not be so quick to lop heads off. I was innocent. Now I have to come back as a zombie, which is more trouble than it’s worth.

  139. I think it’s better than the origanal. Now hurry up with chapter 11. I don’t have all day.

  140. sorry about making you a zombie… I’ve been spending WAY to much time with Kagome! Thanks again for chappy 10! Can’t wait(okay I can)for chappy 11!

  141. Oh please, pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty puh-leeeeeeeeze with sushi on top put me in the story!!!! You can put me in as either Vera or Jenny!!!! PUH-LEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZE!!!!!

  142. Fine, Vera, you can be the mysterious person who heard the whole thing back at my house!! You’ll have followed us in order to meet Artemis and get Artemis-obsessing therapy!!! And you shall be Vera!! And you’ll probably be in Chapter 12!!!

    With sushi on top? Make it a bacon cheeseburger and I’ll get it done sooner. *laughs* Not really. I’ll hurry anyway.

  143. YAYAYAYAY!!!!!!! I WILL GET FOALY TO ADOPT ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! awesome update!

  144. LOL!!!!!!!!
    HILARIOUS UPD8!!!!!!!!
    Foaly:รขโ‚ฌยฆ..Okay then. Toushiro, why do you choose to be a crazy ninja?

    Toushiro: Because itรขโ‚ฌโ„ขs fun and nobody threatens me, EVER.

    EXCEPT YOSSSSSSSSSHI!!!!!!!!!
    BUT THAT’S COZ SHE’S LORD WONKIEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!11

    I LUV IT, PLZ UPD8!!!!!!!!!!!!

  145. IwishIwasafaerie June 27th, 2009 at 7:12 pm 149

    LUV IT! BUT ADD MORE RANDOM THINGS APPEARING OUT OF NOWHERE.

  146. IwishIwasafaerie June 27th, 2009 at 7:16 pm 150

    I think AK’s more obbesed with Foaly than Arty.

  147. I am. Artemis is a cowpog(moron)compared to Foaly! ARTEMIS SUX COMPARED TO FOALY!!!!!!!!! FOALY RULZ!!!!!!!!!!!!! and so do kitties :3 PET THE KITTY!

  148. LoL=Live out Loud
    ok=Opal Koboi
    :3=random kitty
    so remember LoL NEVER be ok and… PET THE :3!!!!!!!!!!

  149. Sorry about the lack of randomness recently!! I’m running low on randomness as of right now…

    Vera you shall be in!!!

  150. PET THE KITTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :3
    Random Kitty: Pet me
    Me: PET THE RANDOM KITTY!!!!!!!! Oh and, UPDATE!!
    pet the kitty, or you will die :3

    Good lord, AK, I know this was old, but really?! That many of each letter?

  151. chappy 12… your evil… AWESOME!!!! again, WERE IN THE LIVING UNIVERSE IS SORA CULLEN BUTLER!?!?!?!?!?!? Did you like just make her leave or something? I know! Maybe we should ask HER fow help. She is Butler after all with a blue diamond when she’s 12!

  152. ARGH!!! THERE ARE TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS DARN THING!!! *head explodes* Fine, I shall put her in both new chapters. Give me a minute.

  153. LOL WE’RE EVIL!!!!!!!!!!!! I didn’t actually mean for you to put the random kitty in,(who’s name is Moonblaze BTW)I just remembered that from this person from you tube and at the begining of every single one of their vids they out ‘PET THE KITTY!!!!!’ and stuff like that and it got ingrained into my brain. again, I LOVE THIS!!!!!!! WE ARE SOOOOOOOOOOOOO EVIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  154. I don’t know why I put the kitty in, needed randomness I suppose. But I think I’ll leave the name as ‘random kitty’.

    YES WE ARE EVIL!!! BEING EVIL IS FUN!!!

  155. True, true. Oh and remember ‘randomness is bliss!’

  156. YAY!!!!!!!!!! I LLOVE UR UPD8!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    PPLE CAN U LEAVE YOSHI ALONE PLZ??????
    SHE’S ALREADY GOT A HANDFUL 2 UPD8 ND ANY1 ELSE THAT WANTS TO BE INNIT CAN WAIT FOR THE NXT FIC………..I AINT BEIN MEAN BUT DNT U THINK THAT IF YOSHI ADDS EVRY1 IN HER FIC THEN SHE AINT GONNA BE ABLE 2 CONTROL IT???
    SOM PPLE AINT GONNA GET LINES ND THN START COMPLAININ ND SHE’S GONNA HAV 2 FIND LINES FOR EVRY1………YOSHI I THINK YOU’VE GOT ENOUGH PEEPS NOW ND U SHOULDN’T ADD NO MORE IN……THO IF U CAN COPE WITH IT THN OF COURSE U SHOULD ADD MORE IN BUT I’M ONLY SAYIN IT SO THAT U FIND IT EASIER 2 FINISH UR FIC………..PLZ DNT MIND WAT I SAID

  157. I know what happens when you add too many peeps. That happened on A Fowl Trial 2. I’m gonna have to shave a few peeps off it before I publish it, which will probably be when I’m 20.

  158. YEA I’M ONLY SAYIN IT 2 HELP YOSHI OUT INNIT?

  159. update! and don’t put any more people in!

  160. updatey soony, and remeber we all is loony!!! :insane: :spaz: :crazy: :loony: :chapter14soonplz:

  161. Thanks Toushiro, I needed somebody to say that. I should have actually said it myself, because I’m getting to where I’m gonna have to make a list of all the people in it to remember everybody, but yeah, I’m too proud to admit that I can’t keep up with all these new people. I will make a new fic for all these new crazies, but that will take a little bit. I’ll probably start it off a lot like this one did, so be on the lookout for it of you wanted to be in this one.

    And I apologize to all the peeps I forgot to put into a chapter, particularly Sora Cullen Butler, who I’ve had to put in a couple chapters after the fact.

    And Ally Kat, how on earth could I forget that we all is loony? *cracks a grin*

  162. LOL CHAPPY 14 IS SOOOOOOOO FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  163. IwishIwasafaerie June 29th, 2009 at 2:53 am 167

    I want thearapy!
    Me:Hey Foaly, I bet you can’t cure me!
    Foaly: Oh, really?
    3 hours of “tec-talk” later……
    Me: Nice try, but I’m not sane and boring and logical.
    Foaly: Ok then…. I’ll scare you into being sane.
    Me: I’d like to see you try!
    Foaly: Oh no…not me. ROOT’S GHOUST!!!
    *Root’s ghoust appears in a scary puff of smoke*
    Me:*flinch slitely*
    Root: Wow, you freaks are hard core! That usually get’s a high-pitched squeal.
    3 hours of getting yelled at by Root later..
    Root: You puss filled sack of troll droppings! You aren’t even good enough to be sane! Chix Verbil wouldn’t take you out on a date! He’d be traumatized for life in 5 seconds with you!
    Me:*grins hugely* Yeah, I’m cool like that.
    Root:Hey, Minerva’s ghoust, get over here.
    *Minerva’s ghoust appears*
    Minerva:*cracks knuckles* I’ve been practicing on Beau for years.
    3 hours of getting yelled at by Root and Minerva later…………
    Minerva: And Vouge’s paris would rather elect Britney Spears most sane and fashionable over YOU!!
    Me:*yawns* You done? I didn’t notice.
    Minerva:Pardon me, I didn’t hear you. I was to dizzy from your morning breath.
    Me:Oh go count your nail polishes, Minerva!
    *throws bomb at Minerva*
    Me:I hate GLOSSY GIRLS.(My knew term for girls like Minerva.)Opps, I hit Root too! Guess I’ll have to summon his ghoust.
    *sits cross-legged, closes eyes, puts turban on and makes strange wheezing sounds*
    AK:You sure that’s how to summon a ghoust?
    Me:Oh no, I was just clearing my sineses. Hey, Root, Mulch says your butt smells.
    Root:WHERE’S THE CONVICT!!! Oh, what did you need?
    Me:Just wanted to say sorry for blowing you up.
    Root:It’s cool. BTW, nice resistance to yelling. You and your evil friends wanna volenteer at Howler’s Peak? I can get you a job yelling at the convicts and the new recruits.
    Me: You know it! Knuckle touch.
    *knuckle touch*
    Root:Okay, see you disturbed mud-children Saturday. I gotta go yell at Mulch.
    Me:Bye.
    *Root disappears*

  164. I don’t know… I’ll seriously try to put you in, though I can’t make any promises. I’ve got fifty zillion peeps (okay, maybe not that many, but it feels like it) already in it, and I’ve started forgetting people on accident. I will try my best though!!

  165. BUT YOU ARE THE VERY LAST ONE!!!

  166. Oh yeah, I was trying to put you in, but I came across a little problem. I don’t know what to call you!!! o_O I can’t put you in as iwishiwasafaerie, so give me a nickname or something plz!!!

  167. they aren’t on right now… so it’ll be a while before they can actually give you a nickname right now. I just call thm IWIWAF

  168. IwishIwasafaerie June 29th, 2009 at 2:39 pm 172

    Yay, iwiwaf is good or just wishes.

  169. YEA THATS WAT I HAD 2 CALL U IN THE CHATROOM BUT SERIOUSLY I TELL U 2 GIV YOSHI A BREAK ND THEN U GO ND ASK HER IF U CAN B IN HER FIC!!!!!!!!!!

    U REALLY R LOONY!!!!!!!!!

  170. NINJA GIRL????
    I REPEAT NINJA GIRL???????
    OOOOOOOOOOH ARTY UR ASKIN 4 IT!!!!!!!!
    I LUV UR UPD8!!!!!!!!!
    HAHA HE’LL NEVA B ABLE 2 GET US!!!!!!!!!!!
    NINJA GIRL SHOULD THINK OF A WAY 2 GET HIM BACK!!!!! I’LL COM BACK AS SOON AS I’V THOUGHT OF MA REVENGE PLAN!!!!

  171. Toushi, *laughs* we’re going to have our revenge for his revenge. Believe me, even though I’m the author, I STILL don’t like what Artemis did. I’m strange like that.

    IWIWAF, I’m putting you in as ‘Wishes’ because I like that name better.

  172. IwishIwasafaerie June 29th, 2009 at 4:21 pm 176

    OK

  173. K…..TRY THIS OUT………
    BUTLER GETS A MYSTERIOUS RING FRM A CALLER WHICH IS ACTUALLY AK ND HE HAS 2 GO OUT 2 MEET THE CALLER…..WEN BUTLER LEAVES ARTY GETS A CALL…..ONCE AGAIN FRM AK……WHO CLAIMS 2 B BUTLER ND TELLS HIM 2 COM 2 A HOUSE THAT WE’V RENTED OUT……..THE HOUSE IS FULL OF BOOBY TRAPS.

  174. Maybe next time… I’ve already started this chapter. It involves Beckett, markers and Mountain Dew. MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!!!!!

  175. Yup, now I’ll start the next chappie because I have nothing better to do.

  176. LOL CHAPPY 15!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG! I DIDN’T THINK IT WAS POSSIBLE BUT NOW I LOVE SUGAR HIGHS EVEN MORE!!!!!!!!!!! *gets on sugar high and runs off into random field interupting Arty and Holly’s date*

  177. You know me, you definatly know me.

    That’s all I have to say.

  178. Really? I was taking a wild guess… Awesome!!! I was right!!! I hope you like Chappie 16!! Plz vote!!!

  179. Okay I say we… make Artemis meet Barney! I’m not kidding. Barney is evil! We make Artemis meet Barney, Barney tourtures Arty for a bit, then we get rid of Barney before he can kill Arty. Sound good? Oh and Paris Hilton albums will play the whole time!!

  180. IwishIwasafaerie June 30th, 2009 at 2:19 am 184

    TIE HIM TO A CHAIR AND FORCE ELMO TO MAKEOUT WITH HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  181. I think after you gies do that stuff 2 poor Arty, he should get relay depressed and you should say sorry…. I mean the slime is 1 thing but if anyone ever pretended to take one of my three siblings I’d probably never talk to them again… especially if I tried to save them…. but the story is hilarious! i loved it!! just not the parts were you hert Artemis

  182. IwishIwasafaerie June 30th, 2009 at 2:33 am 186

    Sorry but we’re demented. I wouldn’t hurt Arty (permantly.)Tee Hee Hee. I love him. In a cousin I’ve never met(expect in my daydreams), but am really close to way. I’m forming relasionships with the characters in my daydreams!!!!!!!!!

  183. I say we lock him in a room with Barney with Paris Hilton AND Britney Spears CDs playing. Oh and don’t forget to give Barney shurikens!

  184. shadowsnake451 June 30th, 2009 at 1:26 pm 188

    WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!
    that was fantastic! five stars 4 ever
    will you do another chapter with me in. pleeeeeeeeeeeease. pretty please!!!!!!!!!!

  185. Yeah, I have to say that that part was pretty evil. Even for me. Maybe he will get depressed. You’d be surprised at how little control I have over this story, so I can’t say anything for sure yet.

    And IWIWAF, I’m worse than that. I’m even more paranoid than Foaly (yes, it is indeed possible), and always feel like somebody from a book (usually Foaly or Artemis Fowl) is watching me with surveillance cameras, and I can come up with several different impossible theories for every little noise… I’m paranoid…

  186. You people really want to scar Artemis for life, don’t you?? *shivers* I’m glad I’m not Artemis… I like Ally Kat’s idea, although I was thinking more along the lines of us all standing around him in a circle poking him with sticks for four hours straight… You guys seem to like Barney though…

  187. U USED MA IDEA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LUV THE UPD8!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO IT’S GR8 K….I THINK U SHOULD………………..I’LL GET BK 2 U!!!!!!!!

  188. SoraCullenButler June 30th, 2009 at 6:13 pm 192

    I say you leave him in a room with me for a few hours. Think about it, I’m a Butler, I have my blue diamond, and I’m a girl. I can break some bones AND humiliate him at the same time, without any possible chance of killing him. And I don’t even have to break bones, just cause slight pain and humiliation if you want. But I’ll need a camera and an Internet connection… Oh and I need some stuffed animals too! You can only guess what Arty would have to do. (insert evil laugh here)

  189. How about public humiliation then? We strip him down to his undies and a shirt, give him a fake microphone, and force him to sing along with ‘Old Time Rock ‘n’ Roll’ by Bob Seger while we’re recording the whole thing. That won’t scar him for LIFE just a couple of years before the video gets lost on You Tube forever. *whispersthenI’lldigitupfromyoutubeandputitonmychannlewhispers*

  190. K. I LYK AK’S IDEA SO I SAY WE HIRE A FAKE MFIA ND GET HIM 2 PRETND KIDNAP BEKETT ND MYLES *BRIBE THEM WITH A BOX OF FERRERO ROCHERS ND A YOUNG EINSTEIN’S BOOK OF THEORIES!*
    ARTY GETS ANOTHA CALL BUT THIS TYM HE SEE’S US PLAYIN FRIZBEE OUTSIDE SO HE ELIMINATES US FRM THE SUSPECTS LIST…..WELL NOT REALLY ELIMINATE JUST PUTS US THIRD AFTA OPAL ND JON SPIRO!…..ND GOES TO RESCU HIS BRO’S………HE MEETS THE KIDNAPPER/MAFIA, WHO HAS THE TWINS LOCKED IN A CAGE ABOVE A TANK FULL OF SHARKS ND THE KIDNAPPER TELLS ARTY 2 SING ND DANCE IN HIS UNDIE ND SHIRT IF HE EVA WANTS 2 C HIS BROS AGAIN!!!!
    THN WE RECORD IT ND OF COURSE TORTURE HIM WITH IT!!!!!!!

    CAN I SND A LINK 2 THE LEP’S YOUNG OFFENDERS PROFILE…….IT’S BASICALLY A SATTELITE SIGANL THAT PICKS UP IMAGES OF YOUNG OFFENDIN ELVES FRM AROUND THE WORLD, THEN IT GETS SNT 2 THE LEP’S COMP SO THAT THY CAN START A COURT CASE IF IT’S SERIOUS!!!!!!
    THAT SHOULD B FUN!!!!!

  191. and don’t forget to put it on you tube!!!!!!!!!

  192. IwishIwasafaerie June 30th, 2009 at 9:22 pm 196

    Make him eat lollipops that look like opal Koboi!!!!!! We shall also make the random kitty attack him with nunchucks.

  193. IwishIwasafaerie June 30th, 2009 at 10:01 pm 197

    Or make him listen to Gorge The Bra that tells ghoust stories.Strap him to an electric chair. Have big bird(from seasame street)throw sharp darts at him.

  194. LOL good idea Wishes! You mean George The Bra Who Tell Ghost Stories from iCarly? Kool!

  195. You guys are CRUEL… *grins evilly*

    I’m not going to hurt him. Physically.

    I like Toushi-chan’s idea. Getting some mobster, and then getting him to dance around in his underpants singing stupid — WAIT I KNOW WHAT HE’LL SING!!! OH I’M SOOOO EVIL!!!!!! *grins ear to ear evilly* He’s gonna hate me after this!!! *does super I-love-being-evil dance* Just wait and see!!

  196. Awesome! I can’t wait!!! Was it the Gir song you had in mind? That song is always a good laugh for me!

  197. Yeah the Gir Song rules! And it’s SUPER humiliating if you sing it!!! ๐Ÿ‘ฟ

  198. IwishIwasafaerie June 30th, 2009 at 11:37 pm 202

    Thank U Kagome.

  199. IwishIwasafaerie July 1st, 2009 at 1:14 am 203

    OH!!!!!!!!!!!!! I figured it out! Someone(yourface)is impersonating Yoshi!

  200. OMG I luv da update!!!!! I lol’d soooooo hard! Arty’s gonna get it. Tee hee.

  201. No, actually, good guess IWIWAF. It really is me. You’ll find out more about that in Chappie 19 or so… *grins*

  202. YOU HAVE TO UPDATE NOW THEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  203. I just did!!! I made him sing the Gir Song!!!

    Am I not evil? *grins evilly*

    And as to what is wrong with me in the story… I might as well tell you now!!!

    I’m suffering from a debilitating bout of…

    NORMALNESS!!! (Dunn dunn dunn…)

  204. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!! NORMALNESS!!!!!!! You do know this means I have to kill you know right? *takes out Tetsiga and baseball bat*

  205. Toushiro: WHAT?!?!

    Ally Kat: *whispers in Toushiroรขโ‚ฌโ„ขs ear*

    Toushiro: Yeah, letรขโ‚ฌโ„ขs be nice and let him go.

    Everyone else: Have you two gone CRAZY?!?!

    LOL!!!!!! THAT WAS HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    ND WHO R U ND WAT HAV U DONE WITH YOSHI????????
    OOOOOOOOH SOMETHING SEEMS FISHY…….I MYT ASWELL KEEP MA KATANA NXT 2 ME JUS 4 SAFETY!!!!!!

  206. I H8 THE FORUM!!!!!!!!!!!
    I KEEP COMIN UP AS A GUEST MEMBA!!!!!!!1 HOW THE HELL DOES THAT WORK OUT IF I REGISTERD!!!!!!!!???????????????
    ND I CNT FIND NO ONE EXCEPT MIASAKI-CHAN!!!!!!!

  207. PLEASE UPDATE!

  208. *uses Mesmer* Your going to update right now Yoshi, even if it’s incomplete your going to put up the update right now. *stops using Mesmer* PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!!!!!!!

  209. I tried, the comp got all glitchy on me…

    Now I have to go to my dad’s, and he doesn’t let me on the comp… o_O

    You’ll have to wait ’til tomorrow, but I’ll update then! I promise!

  210. fine…*grumbles angrily to self*

  211. IwishIwasafaerie July 1st, 2009 at 10:57 pm 215

    I think you should make a betrayal and randomness part 2. It’s getting a bit long.

  212. Good idea…

  213. IwishIwasafaerie July 2nd, 2009 at 3:16 pm 217

    Thanks

  214. It would be helpful. This is getting a tad hard to read.

  215. YEA THAT WOULD B A GR8 IDEA!!!!!!!1

  216. Fine then, I officially say that ATOBAR shalt no longer be updated. *shocked silence*

    I’ll start the new one tomorrow!!!

  217. YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  218. Yoshi, please email me. My email is PELNAR1990@AOL.COM use this information wisely…

  219. IwishIwasafaerie July 4th, 2009 at 4:26 pm 223

    I had a dream where you all snuck into my house. Toushiro was in my bathroom. I threw something at her. The rest of you where crammed onto my couch. You were all 15 and kinda fat. It was weird.

  220. UPDATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  221. I WAS IN UR BATHROOOM????????
    WTH???????
    DO U EVN KNO WAT I LOOK LYK?????
    WEIRD DREAM!!!!
    HOW DARE U CHUK SUMFINK @ ME?????????…….EVN IF IT WAS A DREAM!!!!!!!!

  222. UUUUUUUUUUUUUU

    PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP

    DDDDDDDDDDDD

    888888888888888

    !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  223. LOL I LUV DA UPDATE!!!!! OMG SPONGEBOB SURED YOU! I HAVE to give one of thoes to my pet ninja squirrel, Bob.

  224. THANK U 4 FINALLY UPDATIN!!!!!! NOW UPD8 AGAIN!

  225. LOL!!!!!!!!!1
    SPONGEBOB??????????? WERZ PATRIK???????????
    HAHAHA CNT WAIT 4 THE UPD8!!!!!!!!!
    YAY I GOT 2 SAY QUIET A LOT!!!!!

  226. FEED ONE TO JULEIT! It would be nice to have a kick-butt, teenage wresler girl with connections on our side.

  227. YAY WE GOT CRAZY YOSHI BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    WOOOOOOOOOO GO YOSH-SAN ND HER CRAZY EVIL PLOTS!!!!!!!!!!!!

    I’M TOTALLY EVIL ND INSANE HERE!!!!!!!!
    AM I SERIOUSLY THAT BAD????? TELL ME I AINT THAT CRAZY!!!!!!!!???????????

  228. Wow. I love the randomness! Please check your email! I’ve got an idea for this story…

  229. The ral your face July 13th, 2009 at 1:00 am 234

    Lol… giggle giggle… Add me? please? I wana appear out of thin are wearing a monkey costume to scare Arty out of his wits!!! then while he’s on Crabby Patty high i wana sing peanut butter jelly time with him! And we’ll all b dressed as bananas! OH and we’ll video tape it and show it 2 his family along with the video of him singing the GRR song! LOL

  230. shadowsnake451 July 17th, 2009 at 2:55 pm 235

    please please please please please put me in.
    I’m crazy too you know. absoloutely loopy. I promise that that was not entirely a device to get me in. I love this fanfic and I am going to keep nagging you to put me in.
    p.s. my catchphrase is Booyah!

  231. Okey doke, I’ll try.

  232. Update, and don’t put any more people in. I may have to kill you if you put in any new people. WE HAVE ENOUGH ALREADY!

  233. Update please.(or I will be forced to blow Up the world)

  234. What are you dandin? A Vogon?

  235. Beckett Simpleton August 20th, 2009 at 1:18 am 240

    MORE MORE MORE MORE MORE! *shakes Yoshi by the sholders* MOREEEEEE! *picks Yoshi up and turns him upside down and shakes the hell out of him* MOOOOOOOORE
    *starts to srivle up and die* give me MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!
    *eyes go realy wide* *talkes to the bedroom wall* GIVE ME M.O.R.E.!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  236. IwishIwasafaerie August 20th, 2009 at 1:28 am 241

    I AGREEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!

  237. ok people please read all the comments. I did tell yoshi b4 tht she’s wrkin way too hard puttin pple in to her fic nd she agreed so plz dnt try nd giv her a break.

    btw beckett-simpletoon: u called yoshi a he….I made tht mistake once….I’m still payin for it!

  238. Beckett Simpleton August 24th, 2009 at 3:28 pm 243

    i know i just do it automatically. i do it when i am talking aswell. sorry Yoshi plz dont kill me cos then we wilol have a kill fight cos i will kill u for not updatin’

  239. ooh… can i be in?

  240. IwishIwasafaerie August 24th, 2009 at 8:54 pm 246

    PUT. HER. IN. IT.

  241. IwishIwasafaerie August 24th, 2009 at 10:22 pm 247

    Yosh, where is you?!!!!!!!!!!!!

  242. mesmerizes : You will update. You will put me in computer therapy with Shannon. You will NOT steal my sock! ( they glow in the dark for ur information ) so do what i say, MUD GIRL!

  243. MRS.taylorlautner September 4th, 2009 at 9:47 pm 249

    sooooooooo funny!!!!!!!!

  244. *steals Silversong’s left sock* No one is spared. ๐Ÿ˜›

    *stalks beckett simple-toon* You called me a guy. *pulls out flamethrower* Don’t let it happen again.

  245. MuriUmbrielCordeliaN September 5th, 2009 at 3:41 am 251

    *giggles*It’s fun to watch Yoshi torture people that aren’t me!(Getting my sock back time?)

  246. *sighs* No, Muri. You’re never going to get your sock back. My policy. Besides, Mouse ate your sock, along with several others and a recliner, when I forgot to feed him. (Mouse is my pet troll.)

  247. Beckett Simpleton September 6th, 2009 at 11:22 am 253

    you HAVE A TROLL? H.E.L.P! sos i know youre a girl. plz dont kill me ! infact i was looking for you. i need an army of sock stealers for Artemis fowl and stewie griffen take over the world!. please say that you will… plz.

  248. Beckett Simpleton September 6th, 2009 at 11:34 am 254

    i hate you phantome comment snatcher!!!!!

  249. IwishIwasafaerie September 20th, 2009 at 7:15 pm 255

    Wow, this, as always, is amazing. *bows to the supreme power source of wonkie energy within Yoshi*

  250. Beckett Simple-toon September 25th, 2009 at 6:47 pm 256

    please update yoshi! pleeeeeeeeeeeese!

  251. YOSHII!!!!!!!!!
    soz i havn’t reviewd for ages sooooooooo
    OMG I LOV THE UPD*!!!!!!!!!

  252. Beckett Simple-toon October 5th, 2009 at 4:28 pm 258

    UPDATE PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE!

    ME GONNA check the TT’s now then go on sims.

  253. ME ND BEGGIN 4 MERCY?
    Uh-uh THAT WRD SOOOOOOOO DNT GO WIV ME!!!!!

  254. IwishIwasafaerie October 12th, 2009 at 2:16 am 260

    YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!! UPDATE!!!!!!!!!!! Can I throws eggs at him? and guava? And fill his bathrooms w/ weird plastic dolls?

  255. Dude I wish I was there…Nah just kidding…anyways update soon Yoshi….or else…

  256. myles smarty-pants October 13th, 2009 at 1:10 pm 262

    hi is anyone on this story ’cause like i’m gonna ’cause a lower elements meltdown if there isn’t

  257. myles smarty-pants October 13th, 2009 at 1:16 pm 263

    this story is mint better than anything i have written wich by the way i have only written 2 story’s and 1 annoncement

  258. Beckett Simple-toon October 13th, 2009 at 1:52 pm 264

    Ypuv’e written two stories? i might have to hack your account to find it. oh hang on. i forgot about the gross one where arty fancies foaly

  259. lol did u kno yosh ur tow away frm bein 2nd on the commnt list?

    WOW THTS WELL COOL!!!!!!!
    COM ON PEEPS COMMNT!!!!

  260. Beckett Simple-toon October 13th, 2009 at 8:21 pm 266

    hmm. POINLESS COMMENTS! WHAT I DO BEST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  261. This is officially the second-most-reviewed story in all of AFFF!!! Majorly awesome!!! ๐Ÿ˜€

    It’ll take about a hundred more to become most reviewed, but hey, I’m not stopping it anytime soon. ๐Ÿ˜‰ I can always hope.

  262. IwishIwasafaerie October 17th, 2009 at 4:10 pm 268

    inches closer all the time. UPDATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hope well get youn to most reviewed!

  263. well update if u wnt commnts!!!
    *stares daggers at yosh* or i take ur supply of dr.p’s away frm u!

  264. holly fowl360 October 28th, 2009 at 5:40 pm 270

    bwaahaahahahahahaahah

  265. wat do u mean bwaahaahahahahahaahahaahhahahhaahahahah
    she wont even update!

  266. Duck With No Name November 2nd, 2009 at 10:47 pm 272

    WOW!!! I love this story! It is definitely one of the funniest and craziest stories that I have read on this site! Please keep going with it! I love it!!! ๐Ÿ˜€ 5/5!!!

  267. beckett simpleton November 8th, 2009 at 7:32 pm 273

    is screaming so loud she tears up her throat. PPPLLLEEAAASSEEE

    .
    .
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    .

    update.

    pleasepleasepleasepleaseplesaepleaseplease.

  268. I think I’ll update tomorrow… *huge yawn*

  269. ^ ๐Ÿ˜€
    Now Hide and Seek With Opal Koboi is another story…

  270. Beckett Simple-toon November 24th, 2009 at 1:31 pm 276

    TOMORROW WAS AGES AGO!!!!!!!!!!

  271. Sorry! I had a brain fart. I think I’ll update… Soon!

  272. hi yoshi u REALLY NEEEEEED
    .
    .
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    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
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    .
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    .
    .to update. seriously. listen to Beckett Simple-toon

    p.s hi claudia

    Comment edited by BlackOpal for stretching the page. ๐Ÿ™‚

  273. beckett simpleton December 5th, 2009 at 9:58 pm 279

    hello george. you CAN’T just take someone’s story and update it! if you had asked first… this is rediculous. CHANGE YOUR NAME. seriously. yoshi is a GREAT login name but be origional. dont mess with yoshi. please. it’s not funny. nor is it constructive, educational or doing wonders for your reputation in any way!

    getting a login name that’s origonal isn’t hard. beckett simple-toon came to my head strate away. why dont you change it to echaz or somthing on your account settings. it’s in the dashbord option. please. this will come back to bite you in the butt…

  274. Kierisa Zwรƒยถlf December 5th, 2009 at 11:52 pm 280

    Wow theres a heck of alot of spam here! O.o I’m half way tempted to delete this whole thing, but since theres so many chapters and you guys seem to enjoy it I won’t. But please no more

    double posting
    comments that just say “UPDATE”
    or just talking to each other instead of reviewing xD

  275. George, why do you feel the need to both copy my story and my username? K12, PLEASE don’t say that you feel kind of like deleting my story. If it’s a problem, I can delete all the spamments, one by one.

    ~Yoshi

  276. Beckett Simple-toon December 8th, 2009 at 9:58 pm 282

    please dont delete a tale of betrayle and randomness. it makes us want to get up in the moring.

  277. Please don’t delete this, even tho I’ve officially left I’ll still come just to see how this is getting on!!!

    I love this fic, it’s the best one on this site!!

  278. ….. *puts* What ’bout me. (JK)
    That was way to short but as always I still loved it!!!!!!!!!!!!

  279. Sorry about the shortness, I had to fight writer’s block every step (or word, as the case may be) of the way. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Thanks guys! I feel loved!!!

    ~Yoshi

  280. myles smarty-pants December 11th, 2009 at 7:07 pm 288

    *sniff and feels sorry for yoshi’s writer’s block*but you can’t have writer’s block your one of the best and the craziest writers ever.

  281. Beckett Simple-toon December 11th, 2009 at 8:11 pm 289

    WoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO.

    that classifies me as crazy and i get writer’s block all the time.

  282. Beckett Simple-toon December 11th, 2009 at 8:33 pm 290

    right. i have just learnet the trickes of the yoshi trade.

    Me: Grabbs Artemis by the hair* UPDATE OR I WILL MAKE HIM FACE UNSPEAKABLT HORRORS!
    Arty: Just curious. what horrors?
    Yoshi: HaaaaY!
    Me: the horrors of middle school Georaphy
    Arty: hang on. what year is this because northumberland is the only place where they are stupid enough to still have these things…

    Me: YEAR 7
    Arty: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
    OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
    OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
    OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
    OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
    OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
    OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
    OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
    OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

    NOT THE HORRORS OF MIDDLE SCHOOL STUPIDIFYINGNESS!

    me: se yoshi. youd better act fast or else it’ll get much worse. he’s allready gone mentally unstable just from hearing the WORD middle school.

    Arty: flobajobbajobjobjobjob
    Yoshi: AAAAGH!
    Me: Update.

  283. Beckett Simple-toon December 12th, 2009 at 1:08 pm 291

    Me: thanks for the update. I know youve got wrighters block but get rid of it or mudboy gets it.
    Arty:What nooow?
    Me:Blackeyedpeas
    Arty: Noooooooooo
    Me: Haaaay! i like them.
    Arty: you strapped me to your bed and made me listen to you spotify playlist for SIXTEEN HOURS! LET.ME.GOOOOOOOOOO.
    me: no. only hmmm lets seee….18 more james morrison songs to go.
    Arty: oh come on!
    Me: then two michael buble then two BEP then six Duffy then the Friends theme then four Elbow then four Take That. oh yeah. then twelve Paolo Nutini.
    Arty: I am becoming more suicidle by the minute.
    Me: you cant kill yourself by holding your breath.
    Arty: but i can mesmerize you to kill me.
    Me: *wearing Glasses* no i think not arty boy.
    Arty: fell asleep
    Me: update

  284. Beckett Simple-toon December 12th, 2009 at 1:09 pm 292

    Phantom Comment snatcher i really HATE yOU! one day i’m gonna come and get you and make you listent to my spotify playlist.

  285. please check your email…=3

  286. Sorry, Maggie-chan. I don’t read my e-mail as often as I should. ๐Ÿ˜ณ

  287. EEEEEKS I love the new update!
    Now you need to update!

  288. myles smarty-pants December 28th, 2009 at 3:28 pm 296

    Not trying to be greedy but I’LL SUCK YOUR BLOOD UNLESS YOU UDATE *stands outside he house pacing.*

  289. UPDATE!!!! PLEASE! That was, like, one of the best things I’ve ever read!

    ๐Ÿ™‚ ๐Ÿ˜› :O :mrgreen: ๐Ÿ˜ˆ ๐Ÿ‘ฟ ๐Ÿ˜‰ ๐Ÿ˜• ๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜€ ๐Ÿ˜ณ ๐Ÿ˜ฏ

    I am obsessed with smileys at the moment.

  290. ๐Ÿ™‚ ๐Ÿ˜ฎ

  291. shadowsnake451 December 31st, 2009 at 2:18 pm 299

    THAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNKKKK YOOOOUUUU!
    YES YES YES YES YES I HAVE A PLACE IN YOUR LEGENDARY STORY
    FOR THIS I WILL NOT STEAL YOUR FLAMETHROWERS AND TURN ON YOU FOR TAKING SO LONG ON UPDATING. UPDATE AGAIN NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    I’ll get off caps now. I was just slightly over excited.

  292. Update before I pay you a visit with my tank!
    Come on Yosh! Please, please, please?
    I’ll buy you a e-tank….I brought Iwa one and there’s another one with bazooka’s attached on sale for new year! I’ll get it for you if you update!!!

  293. shadowsnake451 January 11th, 2010 at 2:32 pm 301

    update again already

  294. Hurry, Hurry, hurry before I lose my patience.

  295. You don’t want to see what happens when we loose our patience…….. ๐Ÿ˜ˆ

  296. shadowsnake451 January 12th, 2010 at 12:10 pm 304

    patience fading…fading…fading…

  297. Fading some more………. and even more………..

  298. shadowsnake451 January 16th, 2010 at 2:58 pm 306

    Hold on, I have never had patience. My patience faded years ago *reaches for flamethrower…*

  299. *pulls out a set of kunais and my katana*
    Hurry befor I’m actually compelled to use these.

  300. *pulls out lightsaber* Patience gone.

    But don’t worry, I know you’re busy with other things, Yoshi.

  301. shadowsnake451 January 23rd, 2010 at 2:11 pm 309

    *in whiny voice* please update, yoshi. please. pretty please with a cherry on top! Be your best friend?

  302. Beckett Simpleton January 25th, 2010 at 4:45 pm 310

    PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE U.P.D.A.T.E! pritty pritty please?

  303. *sighs* You people don’t even seem to appreciate my updates anymore. ๐Ÿ˜ฅ

    I’ll update when I’m not totally depressed from my mom being in the hospital with a deadly condition, umkay? Deal?

    ~Yoshi

    P.S. Fun fact: My best friend (who is much learned in the ways of AF) won’t even read this story. You know Raine the elf? I tell her about it and she won’t read it. It frustrates me. ๐Ÿ™

  304. Aw, Yoshi… ๐Ÿ™ I’m sorry. Especially about your mom. ๐Ÿ˜ฅ Of course I appreciate your updates… ๐Ÿ˜ฅ ๐Ÿ˜ฅ ๐Ÿ˜ฅ

    Would you like to be in one of my next stories? ๐Ÿ™

  305. shadowsnake451 January 27th, 2010 at 12:07 pm 313

    Oh my god yoshi. I’m so sorry about your mum I didn’t realise. I’m so, so sorry for nagging you.

  306. Sorry Yoshi! You know I love your updates; it’s one of things I most look forward to on this site.
    I’m sorry about your mum…I hope she gets better soon. They tried to shove me into hospital cos of my illness but I made the excuse about exams and got out of it.
    Dont worry about Raine; she’ll read it one day and I know she’ll love it….you cnat help but loving it!

  307. Because it is one of the best stories EVER! ๐Ÿ˜€ ๐Ÿ˜‰ ๐Ÿ˜€

  308. shadowsnake451 January 28th, 2010 at 2:17 pm 316

    Oh man, yoshi! everyone loves your stories! Only those who live in a cultural wasteland would not like this!

  309. Beckett Simpleton January 28th, 2010 at 8:04 pm 317

    well you said comment if you want more and well your second on the most comments in the whole of fanfic. That count as more? PLEASE *screams* MMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEE

  310. Beckett, if I try to write now, ATOBAR would become less funny and greatly more morbid. I found out today that not only is my mom sick, but her condition is deteriorating rapidly and she is now confined to a wheelchair and prone to fits of insanity. If you were in this situation, would you appreciate people demanding updates on a story you just can’t keep up on anymore, when you can barely read from the distraction that accompanies deep depression, or sit for extended periods of time without bursting into tears, let alone come up with something FUNNY to write?

    I have to stop now, lest I lose my patience and cuss you out. But you get the idea, right? *fake smile that turns into a pained grimace*

    ~Yoshi

  311. Evyluvsbunnies January 29th, 2010 at 5:38 am 319

    Oh my god. I am so sorry about your mom Yoshi. (I am literally crying while I type this.)

    To the people above: Be kind. Stop nagging.

  312. Kierisa Zwรƒยถlf January 29th, 2010 at 2:51 pm 320

    @Yoshi: I’m so sorry D= She’s in my prayers [which even if you don’t believe in God can’t hurt, can it?]

    @Everyone else: No more posts on this story until Yoshi’s mom is better and Yoshi’s in the mood. Not one single ask for an update, ya hear?

  313. Gotcha. Yoshi…. SO SORRY. SOOOOOO SORRY. ๐Ÿ˜ฅ ๐Ÿ˜ฅ ๐Ÿ˜ฅ ๐Ÿ˜ฅ ๐Ÿ˜ฅ

  314. shadowsnake451 January 30th, 2010 at 3:25 pm 322

    Can do, kierisa. Sorry, yoshi. Oh god.

  315. Don’t worry Yosh, we’re all praying for her here. She’ll get better. Trust fate/god/whatever you believe in.
    @everyone:Please leave her alone she’s going through a horrid time and I think she deserves our support not demands..she’s entertained us and made us happy since May 09 now and she deserves some respect, kindness and a break.
    Anyone who demands a update from Yosh is going to be hunted down and then tortured by me….believe me that’s not good…I own some horrid torture equipment.
    @Yosh: Don’t worry. Everything will be fine. You ignore everything going on here and concentrate on helping your mum get better.

  316. Beckett Simpleton February 5th, 2010 at 6:09 pm 324

    Oh. ๐Ÿ˜ฏ sorry Yoshi. =( i didn’t know (obviously) um… I won’t say anything else I usually just make people feel worse. (like when George’s hamster was sick)

  317. I LUVS THIS STORY!!!

    I’M CRAZY!!!!1

    BOO SANITY!!!!!!!

    This is Artificial Asian. Please do not stretch the page. Kthxbai.

  318. *collapses over computerer*
    The page… is no longer stretched.
    I’m about halfway through the actual story, but just thought I’d like to say
    DUDES!
    One of each letter or punctuation mark is quite enough.
    Thank you.

  319. Silversong21 March 28th, 2010 at 9:31 pm 327

    Update.. or suffer the consequences…

  320. Silversong21 March 28th, 2010 at 9:55 pm 328

    Oh BTW, *utter seriousness* How is your mom…. I’m really sorry…

  321. She’s a lot better now. Enough so that I’ve regained most of my humor and am debating updating this story, actually. ๐Ÿ™‚

    ~Yoshi

  322. shadowsnake451 March 29th, 2010 at 2:50 pm 330

    Thank goodness…don’t tell me prayer doesn’t work, oh no.
    I’m really happy for you Yoshi…and also boardering on total ecstasy that you have your humour back.

  323. Thats awesome, Yoshi. I didn’t wanna hurt your feelings… You really should update! No pressure, though.

  324. shadowsnake451 April 1st, 2010 at 11:46 am 332

    WTFROND did it all go? Oh, no, baby…don’t tell me it all disappeared when you updated, like P&P? *chokes on tears for ATOBAR and P&P*

  325. Ohansahyosheli April 2nd, 2010 at 1:39 pm 333

    It was there…NOW ITS GONE!!!!!! ๐Ÿ˜ฎ

  326. NNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!! it aint here
    TT TT
    ___

  327. shadowsnake451 April 12th, 2010 at 8:52 am 335

    Yay! Now it’s back!
    Maybe P&P will come back soon too…

  328. It’s back because I put it back (I kept an archival copy). Very, very sorry about the loss of P&P. TT_TT

    ~Yoshi

  329. Hermione Fowl April 13th, 2010 at 8:40 am 337

    I hope it’ll come back or be rewritten soon.=)=)=)

  330. shadowsnake451 April 13th, 2010 at 11:06 am 338

    Oh yeah, I see it now, there’s only 4 chapters…do you think the mods will have a copy, do they, like, save everything on the site every hour or so?

  331. Way-ull… If we saved everything on the site individually every hour, that’d be a beepload of stuff. If we just saved the new data, getting rid of the old, it would be gone anyway (which is what happened with the archive sites I checked). If I had a copy of this, it woulda been back up in the first five seconds. ๐Ÿ˜‰

  332. shadowsnake451 April 14th, 2010 at 10:57 am 340

    So, baisically, then, you’re saying for me there is no hope? *sniffles*

  333. There’s always hope. And there’s four chapters because I’m too lazy to go through it and seperate them right now.

    ~Yoshi

  334. shadowsnake451 April 15th, 2010 at 11:01 am 342

    Hope? I remember the concept…vaugely…

  335. Yay! You remembered my panpipes!

  336. Huzzah! You updated! ๐Ÿ˜€ I applaud your dedication in the mystical and humorous art of randomness. For that, we should celebrate… with pie.

    ~Elsa

  337. As soon as I finish working out the kinks with the chapters, I’ll finish my update. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    ~Yoshi

  338. Cant I just jump out Yosh?
    I am half shinigami and half shinobi…and a very skilled one at that. Has Arty blocked crazy ninja girl powers too?
    Love the update, hate the bucket.

  339. shadowsnake451 April 19th, 2010 at 1:27 pm 347

    Yeah, love the update.
    SILVER! Check the announcements column

  340. shadowsnake451 April 20th, 2010 at 1:30 pm 348

    I like- sorry, love, adore, am worshipping,- the update of the update.
    I think I ought to have a weapon- either glitterclaw, my sword, or my amulet of shadows. Well, okay, it’s just an amulet with a purple snake on WHICH COUNJOURS UP YOUR WORST NIGHTMARES AND SUBJECTS YOU TO THEM ALL OVER AGAIN!!! MWAHAHAHAHA

  341. ‘Kay, Shadow, you get both, but occasional usage on Amulet of Shadows. Not that often. Glitterclaw will show up lots more.

    Thanks for the reviews; I feel so loved. ๐Ÿ˜€

    I’ll update as soon as I am appropriately inspired, which is probably going to happen pretty soon, but you know you can’t trust my approximations. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    ~Yoshi

  342. shadowsnake451 April 21st, 2010 at 9:06 am 350

    Thankie Yoshi!

  343. MWAHAHAHAHAH! ha! A VERY fitting title. love brainstorming ways to KILL Minerva.

  344. LOL i need to pee

  345. shadowsnake451 May 13th, 2010 at 9:04 am 354

    Oh, Lep officer, we all SO needed to know that. Yoshi, delete the announcement of Lep’s biological needs, leaser. Really comments should be confined to things vaugely to do with the fic.
    Sorry to be a meanie }:-(

  346. Duck With No Name May 13th, 2010 at 7:35 pm 355

    Haha! Yoshi, you make me laugh so much! I love the important-looking dude dressed as a duck! ๐Ÿ˜† Great update! And it’s a lot easier to read with the bold bits for who’s saying what! ๐Ÿ˜€ Thanks for the update! *Waits patiently for more* ๐Ÿ™‚

  347. Today is a momentous day. I have FINIALLY FINISHED IT!!!! ๐Ÿ˜€ ๐Ÿ˜€ ๐Ÿ˜€ This be amazing, Yoshi! I’d love it if you updated!!!!!!!!! This is hilarious and well written. 356 stars!!!!!! ******************************************** ๐Ÿ˜€ ๐Ÿ˜€ ๐Ÿ˜€

    (22)

    ~CC

  348. *Gasps* Can’t… breath.. Laughing… SOOO. hard!!!! Yoshi, this is so flippin awesome. It is the beastiest and most random thing I have ever read. I. Love. This. :3 I think I died while reading this cuz I was laughing so much! *checks pulse* wait, no. Dang it… ๐Ÿ™ Anyways… FLIPPIN AWESOME!!!

  349. Beckett Simpleton May 29th, 2010 at 2:51 pm 358

    Ahhh atobar. You have a younger sibling now!

  350. Congrats! Is it a boy or girl, Atobar? ๐Ÿ˜€

    -Star

  351. I vote girl. ATOBAR could be the older bro.

  352. Stupid story eating monster. >( Now I can’t read the part where arty dances in his underwear and sings the gir song. ๐Ÿ™

  353. shadowsnake451 June 17th, 2010 at 1:26 pm 362

    You updated it? WITHOUT TELLING ME???!!! You seriously have no idea how many times a day I check Revenge and Awesomeness for an update, and you went and did it HERE!!
    *growls and fidgets with amulet* Hmm…
    On a brighter note: freaking awesome update! I’m so glad I got to do the moustache thing ๐Ÿ™‚ Thanks 4 that. I actually laughed out loud quite embarrassingly in the middle of the school IT suite. Now please update, and MENTION it when you do!
    No, but seiously, update!

  354. Hi Yoshi. Can you put me into the story? My crazy specialties would be the ability to control or manipulate any outer space-ish, objects or anything to do with outer space. My weapon of choice is a meteor sword. I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE your stories! You need to UPDATE UPDATE OR I SHALL THROW MY FLAMING METEOR BALLS AT YOU! PLEASE update! You have some weird talent. Would you like to be friends? Hehehee. I also have a cookie obsession and I can make them aprear out of thin air. I like cookies! COOOOKKKKKIIIIIEEEESSS! UPDATE SOON! I think your stories are awesome! RANDOMNESS RULES! GO WONKIES OF FG! HEHEHEHEHEEHE…

  355. shadowsnake451 July 20th, 2010 at 1:51 pm 364

    *cough-Fowlstar’s-having-a-little-sugar-rush cough*

  356. wrr0rzxpurrt August 22nd, 2010 at 5:52 am 365

    No one will prob read this comment because there’s just so many here… Anyways it wad so ridiculous and awesome. Please update, I was like, “wait it ended. What? But… Ugh, I couldve been amused for days…”

  357. A lot of OOCness going on here. Also, IM format isn’t “real”. But because it’s freakin’ HILARIOUS, I’ll give it a generous…

    2/5

  358. Beckett Simpleton September 2nd, 2010 at 11:38 pm 367

    THIS. IS. THE. MOST. AWESOME. SCRIPT. FIC. EVER. AND. YOU. GO. BACK. UP. THERE. AND. RATE. IT. AT. LEAST. THREE.

    ATOBAR is always a special exeption to script fic ness. it’s ledgendary. and i think that this was given up on a while ago for the sequel, a tale of revenge and awesomeness

  359. FoalyIsAGenues September 4th, 2010 at 1:20 am 368

    whoa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  360. Musicman14927 October 7th, 2010 at 9:47 pm 369

    ………………………………………..THAT WAS AWSOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Were do i go to finish the story???????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?????????????????????

  361. Kays, this is completely, totally, amazingly, admittedly, extremely random… but I was reading the comments towards the beginning. WOOT SUPER MARIO SMASH BROS BRAWL! I am SO obsessed with that game now, but Kirby’s my prime character. If I can’t beat something with Kirby, then all of my other options are just OUT THE WINDOW. It’s hilarious, because I go to Stats and it’s like:

    Most KO’s: Kirby
    Most Falls: Kirby
    Most distance traveled: Kirby
    Favorite character (whadaya think!?!?): Kirby

    It goes on and on… all of them say Kirby, except Second Favorite character (Pit) and loneliest character (Wario).

    You beat me with Kirby, I’m just toast. I’m an aspiring player, though, not that good yet. Could defeat a lvl seven computer on a good day, but that’s really it. I know a kid who’s sick of playing against computers, he could have three level nines on the same team and he’d be by himself… the nines would have a handicap… and he’d win. It’s amazing, but I wish he’d stop bragging.

    Anyway, I seriously think this is so much better than its sequel. Really. If I reread this right now, I’d be giggling for like, the next week. And everyone would be like, “Dude, couldja stop laughing?”

    Nope. XD

    This thing is totally plotless… but relatively good spelling/grammar/caps/spelling/punc/spacing make up for it.

  362. THAT WAS SOOO FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  363. I LOVED THIS!!! LOL SO FUNNY!!!

  364. I have only 4 words to say:
    WHY ISN’T THIS FEATURED????

    Seriously. This is as awesome as a unicorn riding a rainbow coloured dragon. In fact, make sure your story has a unicorn riding a rainbow colored dragon in it.

    Featured stories are only for competitions and such. Not for this type of thing. ๐Ÿ˜‰ ~Fowlie

  365. BoboParadizo October 5th, 2011 at 9:37 pm 374

    Oh my lord. Yoshi? You’re back?! Yay! ๐Ÿ˜€ I loved this story. I remember when I first read it…I was laughing so hard that my mom was looking at me like I was a psycho XD

    5/s. Absolutely.

  366. Yoshi-who's-too-lazy-too-log-in November 14th, 2011 at 3:11 am 375

    Thanks guys… I can’t believe everyone loved this this much! Still! My heart is all warm and fuzzy inside now <3

    Since the site has been remade, I think I'll try to reformat it for easier reading. And I just got a laptop so now I have time to do it! Yay!

    ~Yoshi

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