The preview for my comming out story I NEED REVIEWS PLEASE!
Written on February 24th, 2008 by mahi101 AF FanStory Details
- Category: Announcements
- Author: mahi101 AF Fan
- Word Count: 932
- Read 224 times
Hey guys and gals! I’m going to write a new story and it’s comming out soon, I would like to know if it’s good or not and should I write it? Here is a Preview!
{Soft music starting}……..
ONE PERSON
“Someone else knew about the faries longer than I have?Some other HUMAN?” Artemis said
(Show Artemis opening door to some library and closing the door, then when he looks out he gets startled and flips back by acciedent)
CAN SAVE
{Danger music starting}
“WE HAVE TO RUN!” Artemis is yelling.
“Is that our ONLY option?” The girl asked innocently.
“That is our best option” Artemis said grabbing her hand and ruunning out of the factory and as soon as he steps out the factory explodes and they are sentr flying into air.
THE EARTH
{Sad music starting}
Artemis is in his room the curtains are closed and the room is dark, His mother steps in.
“Arty your the only one you can do it, please …….”
“Mother–I feel–as if she’s taking my place….like I don’t exist anymore..I–”Artemis choked out.
IT ALL COMES DOWN TO ONE THING
{Car stopping music starting}
“Do you have toothpaste?”The girl asked
“YES I HAVE TOOTHPASTE!” Artemis yelled.
“Where is it?” the girl asked.
“Uh—-”Artemis said looking at where the toothpaste should be.
“Arty!”Myles said comming into the bathroom.
“We made you a toothpaste cake!”Beckett said bring it over.
“It’s MADE FROM PURE TOOTHPASTE AND WE USED DENTAL FLOSS TO SPELL OUT YOUR NAME ON IT!” Myles and Beckett said proudly.
TWO ANNOYING BROTHERS.
{Funny music startinG}
“Uh–I’ll be right back…..”Artemis said getting up with his face tinted red.
“Huh?Where is he going?”The girl asked innocently
“He has problems sometimes“ Myles whisperred.
“Huh?” The girl said confused.
“He’s in PUBERTY!”Beckett whisperred in her ear.
“Sometimes I wonder what type of things he is thinking about”Myles said which made the girl’s face tint red.
“Myles….”Artemis said grimly with some of his hair covering his eyes.
“Go to sleep……”He said punching Myles into the air…
“I-IS he alright?”The girl said getting up.
“Don’t worry about him.”Artemis said gruffly as he sat down his hair still covering his face.
A TRUELY CLUELESS GIRL
{Soft Music starting}
“Wow they are sure nice to you……” Juliet said to the girl.
“Hmm?Yeah they’re so sweet!” The girl said.
“I think Myles and Beckett are having their first crush!” Juliet said happily to The girl.
“Really?“The girl said, “Wait…but who?”She whisperred the last part. while tilting her head
“You’ve got to be kidding me………you!” Juliet said to the girl.
“Oh come on you don’t think—–oh gosh..your right…” The girl said panicing.
Juliet sighed and grabbed the girls arms,”Don’t worry,”She said plainly, “They are three.”
A faire and a Cetuar
{Funny music}
‘I didn’t remember orderring a bagel……” Foaly said
“Neither did I…”Holly said
“I got the doughnut right?”Foaly asked trying to remember.
“HUH, Can I please just go now?” Said the pixie from Underground dunkin’ doughnuts standing outside the ops. booth.
“WE’VE GOT A MISSION!” Trouble yelled.
“What happened said Holly asked.
“THE WORLD IS IN DANGER! Oh yeah and the bagels mine..”
And a genius.
“The only way you can slove this problem is by….First calculating the missing numbers piossibilities the ajusting them to………….”Artemis explained.
“WOAH! SMARTBOYSAYWUH? Sorry, you lost me at ‘calculating’” The girl said.
CAN HE SAVE HER?
(Shows girl falling off a cliff)
{danger music}
“Artemis!”
“Hold on!” Artemis said as he clutshed her hand.
0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o
{Sad music}
“You—you don’t always have to smile…..”Artemis said to the girl on the floor.
He kneeled before her so they were face to face “Tell people what you want sometimes, you don’t always have to be nice, you can tell people whats wrong.”He said and then hugged her.
“A-artemis….Th-thanks.” She said.
He pulled away,”That’s what friends are for.”
OR IS IT THE END?
{Danger music}
“The world is–malfunctioning!” Foaly said to Holly through the speakers.
“Whats happening?” Holly said.
“There is only one way we can fix this……..”Artemis said.
FIND OUT! Comming in a Commputer near you!
Okay I know that was a really really long preview… I always wanted to do a preview like that, anyway I wanted to know if I should do that story and if you liked it.
If the answers are yes Then it will be comming out soon.
February 24th, 2008 at 9:37 pm
Well I would love reviews Please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
February 24th, 2008 at 9:52 pm
oh yeah and i hope u like it!
February 24th, 2008 at 11:04 pm
I want to read it! Please write it!
February 24th, 2008 at 11:41 pm
I REALLY don’t understand. I’m confused with all the… sound effects and other stuff. It’s the layout that really gets to me.
February 24th, 2008 at 11:46 pm
thanx!I Need more comments though!At least 5-7 more…..But I’m starting it!.
February 24th, 2008 at 11:48 pm
Oh its kind of like a preview like a movie, it just shows parts of it and the type of scene it is.
Like when you wacth a preview of a movie.. I know it’s kind of confusing, sorry!
February 25th, 2008 at 1:35 am
I think I’ll really like it!!! Can’t wait 4 it 2 come out!
February 25th, 2008 at 1:39 am
thanx and now I know what Star Jinin means, It’s only been a couple of hours since I postedthis and it’s half way of the top five new story’s list…..awww…..
February 25th, 2008 at 2:58 am
COOL! I think you should totally write it! Can’t wait to read it!
February 25th, 2008 at 3:56 am
OMG that looks really good! Please post it soon!
February 25th, 2008 at 3:57 am
thanx!
February 25th, 2008 at 11:03 pm
WOW it’s already off the top 5 new stories list….
February 25th, 2008 at 11:30 pm
I like it but I am a little confused, such as WHAT is the problem? I think if u wrote the story I would understand it better! can’t wait!
February 26th, 2008 at 1:54 am
ugh well…. That would be a big spoiler.. but trust be there is a problem…..
February 27th, 2008 at 2:58 am
Tooth … paste … *shivers* … cake …? It’s impossible! IMPOSSIBLE!! IT CAN’T BE! NOOOO!
CCAANNTT WWAAIITT TTOO REEAADD TTHHEE SSTTOORRYY! WWHHEENN IISS IITT CCOOMMIINNGG?
February 27th, 2008 at 3:00 am
PS: The problem is the WORLD is malfunctioninging (not a typo). i think … is it?
February 27th, 2008 at 3:24 am
nope.. THE WORLD IS MALFUNCTIONING!.. ITS TRUE! Well, I was thinking about starting seeing all the GREAT revuiews I got AND I am also mentioning everyone who reviewed up until this point in the dedication. Thanx to all who rebviewed the story’s name with be ..I’ll tel u when I think of one…
February 29th, 2008 at 9:16 pm
lol i really want to read this . it was awesome!!! 5 stars!!! *giggling fit*
February 29th, 2008 at 10:27 pm
thanx i bunch!
February 29th, 2008 at 10:28 pm
Write it!
February 29th, 2008 at 10:34 pm
I need a nAme.. wut do u guys thhink?
February 29th, 2008 at 10:49 pm
For the title?
February 29th, 2008 at 10:50 pm
yeah.
February 29th, 2008 at 11:49 pm
let’s c… um how bout The apocalypse?
March 1st, 2008 at 12:56 am
lurv the preview
March 1st, 2008 at 1:05 am
hmm a title….i like jellys iddea/
March 1st, 2008 at 1:24 am
thanx!
March 1st, 2008 at 1:59 am
The apocalypse? , what does apocalypse mean?
March 1st, 2008 at 4:33 am
okay I looked it up and in one meaning it said it meant good triphumps over evil and in another it said Great or total devastation; doom: the apocalypse of nuclear war.
Anyway both opf those work for me so Jelly’s Tittle it is..lol
March 2nd, 2008 at 1:47 am
NEVER MIND!! I LOVE IT!!!! Can’t wait for the actual thing! Isn’t it funny how a preview got on the top tens?
March 2nd, 2008 at 2:14 am
totally!
March 2nd, 2008 at 11:53 pm
Oooh I like the idea of “The Apoclypse”.
I do have another Idea. “World Malfuntion”.a
March 2nd, 2008 at 11:54 pm
Sorry about the a at the end of my last one, my Brother hit the keyboard.
March 3rd, 2008 at 1:25 am
yeah……. well.. I already started writting it and since I thought of putting the tittle as “The Apoclypse” already I kind of plotted it out to work out like that… its complicated..lolz, But thanx star Jinin.
March 14th, 2008 at 10:51 pm
wow. I was laffing my butt off.;)
March 15th, 2008 at 3:39 am
it sounds like a manga… are you Japanese, by any chance? its got the whole “angsty-guy meets clueless-cute-girl-that-eventually-softens-him while the world is falling apart” motif going for it. A bit overdone, but always satisfying. I can’t wait!
March 17th, 2008 at 9:19 pm
YEAH….. that’s kinda it I’m not japenese (I wish i was though) But i love anime and manga!also guys I cant be on much now b-cuz myt father banned me from the internet…….so u wonyt see me here alot……..sorry!
March 25th, 2008 at 5:39 pm
i liked the toothpaste cake part it was funny
April 5th, 2008 at 8:32 pm
Awesome preview! Can’t wait for the actual story to come out! But so far, it’s awesome!!:P
April 9th, 2008 at 3:01 am
this is only an announcement. why did u categorize it and why did people rate it?
April 9th, 2008 at 3:16 am
Jelly’s right- I’m going to move this to announcements.
Anyway, I’ll say what I always say: If you like it, if you think it’s worthwhile and you’re willing to spend the time writing it, do it. It should be fun; write if you want to. It doesn’t matter what we think.