Chapter 5: The boy who never grew up

Once Artemis had sorted out the light problem, and everybody had sorted themselves out, well apart from that Hook was being sat on by Butler as Butler couldn’t trust him around Fowl, everybody’s gaze turned toward the youthful boy, who was staring at them in return.

“So master Pan…”

“No, it’s just Peter” interupted the boy.

“Fine, Peter, what brings you out of the island they call Neverland?”

“Ah, well you see my friend Tinkerbell has been fairynapped and I think it was him!” Peter explained as he pointed an accusing finger towards the captain, who was in absolute agony.

“Fine…I did it. But… the micheivous… pesk got away… from me… and I’ve been trying to find… it somewhere in a… place called the… Lower Elements.” confessed the captain.

“Oh, so that’s what you were looking for. Why didn’t you tell me sooner” said Holly

“I would’ve, soon enough, if you hadn’t whacked me round the head so many times.” replied the captain while continuously rubbing his sore head.

“Oops!” Holly said timidly.

“HAHAHAHA you got knocked out by a girly!” Peter said mockingly

“Why you little…!” Hook exclaimed as he stood up knocking over Butler and racing towards Peter at lightning speed.

“Hey, hey calm down now! Boy do you need anger management!” stated Butler whilst grabbing the kicking pirate by the scruff of his neck.

“Let me go!!! The only BOY that NEEDS anger management is that wretched pest!” Hook hissed while his metallic hook pointed to the grinning youth.

“What are you grinning at???” inquired Artemis.

“Oh nothing” smirked the golden-haired boy

“What are you smirking at?” Artemis asked

“Oh nothing” the annoying boy replied with a big fat cheesy grin

“What are you…?” Artemis began

“Artemis give it a rest!” Holly exclaimed

“I was bored!!!” He protested

“Well the main thing we need to do is find Tinkerbell and get these two freaks back to where they came from.”Holly replied

“Bad form!” stated Hook

“I beg your pardon!” Holly said, quite confuzzled indeed.

” ‘Tis bad form to call a guest a freak” explained the Captain

“Whatever, so where do you think your pixie friend is then Pan” Holly said

“Don’t call me Pan! You sound just like Codfish!” The irritant youth said whilst pouting his lower lip in a stubborn style.

“Tell me or I shall just have to tie you up and give you to codfi… I mean Hook.” Holly threatened whilst gesturing to the wriggling Captain who was being held by Butler.

“Don’t call me a Codfish you…girly” Hook said, which was a BIG mistake

“Holly, no.” Warned Artemis as he caught the little flame of anger hiding beneath her eyelids.

“What did you call me?” Holly said while brushing Artemis away.

“I called you a GIRLY” Hook said in a sing-song voice. Holly was about to march over there and knock him senseless. Artemis saw this and tried to use his brilliant brain for a plan to stop her. He rushed in front of her and kissed her on the cheek. One of the main reasons he had done this emotional act was because that Foaly had been whispering the song ‘kiss the girl’ from The Little Mermaid behind him. And probably why he had scowled  at Foaly before rushing in front of Holly.

“Oh, Artemis!” Holly exclaimed as she kissed him full on the lips. The kiss was so powerful and deep that they wouldn’t let go until they heard Pan gag rather immaturely behind them. Now why do you think Foaly would be singing ‘kiss the girl’? Perhaps he liked the song and the movie or maybe it was because he had planted mini cameras around Artemis’ study and bedroom and had spied him kissing a picture of Holly every single flipping day.

“Well I’m off!” exclaimed Foaly as he teleported his way to the Lower Elements just in time to see Pan and Hook simultaneously open their mouths like codfish.

Some other stories by artyrox:

• Irreplaceable
• Le Soleil et La Luna
• Winner of the Valentine's Day competition
• Artemis Fowl Fanfiction Competition Rule and Guidelines
• Unfaithful

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