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I'm sorry but you are going to DIE Minerva!

Well.. the title says it all!!!! wahaha!!! DIE MINERVA!! ARTY IS MINE!!!!!

Okay! I've finally colored it! I'm soo HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm not really good at coloring.. but i hope you ike it.....

I'm sorry.. its not um... nice to look at.. *sigh*

i kinda like the butterfly.....

Hope you can comment.....

Oh! Arty!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! please be mine!!!!

just kidding!!!!

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Nicole_artist   [May 01, 2007 at 01:04 AM]
*indignant* I'm not a wanna be! I just wanna be... aw stuff it. I'm a wanna be elf. So sue me. (I don't mean legally! *hides from freaky lawyers*)

**edit**
I have just started on the story. This is gonna take awhile...

**edit**
Okay, this is what I've done so far. Tell me if you like. If you really don't like how I changed what you said (or added something) tell me.
It was a fine, sunny day in Nice. Unfortunately, it wasn’t going to be an enjoyable one for Minerva Paradizo, as all the Minerva-haters from the Fanart Gallery had decided to do something to her for a change, instead of yelling out abuse. Not that Minerva knew that. All she knew was that Artemis had been gone for three years, and now he was back. She didn’t know that because of a few obvious hints about her attractiveness to Artemis in The Lost Colony, she was now the prime target of a group of incensed Fangatherers.

“Let’s turn her into a pumpkin! Does anyone have a magic wand?” Celestial Angel asked, looking around for one. They were still using their screen names (and nicknames) as if everyone put forth their real name things (and they) would be confusing.
AF_roxz wandered over to the nearest wand shop (which happened to be named Ollivanders) and bought wands for everyone, then handed them out. “Biba dee bobadee boo!!” she giggled, waving the wand around and accidentally turning a lamp post into a giant celery stick. “As in Cinderella, the Fairy Godmother says, hehe. And waa lah! We get a blonde pumpkin with glasses!”
“Yay!” Celestial Angel said. “Alakaboola michikaboola bibbity bobbity boo!”
A man walked past and shook his head at, what seemed to be, the lunatics.
“We can do magic, believe it or not!” Celestial Angel shouted after him. “Bibbity bobbity boo!” She accidently, or perhaps on purpose, changed him into a white mouse.
“Lets go find Minerva, we’re supposed to be doing all this to HER,” Nicole_artist said, looking for directions to the chateau.
“Why don’t we just magic ourselves over their?” Katya asked.
“Oh,” everyone said, then magicked themselves over to the chateau where they landed right in front of Minerva, who was reading a difficult looking book in the gazebo.
“There she is!” Nicole yelled, pointing her magic wand at Minerva, who was still shell shocked that a whole bunch of people had just appeared in a puff of smoke in front of her. “Flipendo!” Nicole yelled, which knocked Minerva off the lounge she had been, well, lounging on. “Avada kedavra!” Nicole shouted, but unfortunately as they had only just bought their wands and started doing magic that day, they weren’t powerful enough to kill someone, namely Minerva, yet. And when she shouted Crucio! Nothing happened either.
AF_roxz, picking up on the Harry Potter spells theme, yelled “Experillamas!!!” which, as her aim was slightly off, turned the lounge into a llama, which started chewing on the roses surrounding the gazebo. Everyone stared at the llama for a few seconds, and Celestial Angel hissed “It’s expelliarmus, duh!” to AFr, who responded by sending another spell at Minerva, who had now recovered sufficiently to duck. AFr had not noticed there was a mirror behind Minerva, so the spell rebounded, going slower than it had been before, but heading straight for Nicole.
“Run for your life!” CA screamed, then added: “Err, memory.”
“Or you’ll join Gilderoy Lockheart in the infirmary ward for permanent cases in St Mungo’s!” AFr added helpfully.
Nicole didn’t pay too much attention, and instead ran for her memory as suggested by Celestial Angel. “NOOOOOO!!!!!” she screamed. “I CAN’T LET MY MEMORY BE DESTROYED!!!!”
Nicole ran a hundred metres with the spell closing in slowly behind. Then she remembered she still had her magic wand, so she summoned Butler, then summoned a huge mirror, gave it to him, yelled “Save me from the light!” and hid behind his bulk.
Butler, who everyone knows has now assumed the occupation of general protector of all, held up the mirror to the light which rebounded off it not a split second later. Unfortunately it rebounded back to the gazebo, this time faster than it was before. (Weird, but spells are weird.) Everyone was hypnotized by the pretty light that looked almost like a comet made out of pale blue sparkles. At least, until someone had the sense to yell “DUCK!” and everyone dropped to the floor. Everyone except the llama, which had moved on to chewing the lounge. It was struck, flew back and hit the gazebo railing from the force of the spell. After a second or two of blank expression in it’s eyes, it got back up and started chewing on the bottom of Minerva’s dress.
“The llama is a rather unintelligent animal,” Minerva stated. “I don’t believe the memory spell affected it as it survives mostly on instinct. Besides, I don’t think that your spell was strong enough to destroy all it’s memory.”
Rather than having the desired effect of impressing everyone with her knowledge of the Memory Charm, this statement reverted their attention back to her. And, just in case you have forgotten, destroying her.
“Get her!” Nicole roared in her best scary serious voice. (She had magicked herself over there after she tore he gaze from the sparkly spell.) But unfortunately they didn’t have a chance to “get her” as Butler ran into the gazebo.
“What in the name of Guns and Ammo is going on here?” he bellowed in a thunderous voice.
“It’s Butler,” AFr stated, rather unnecessarily. Then she pulled a cloak of invisibility from her armpit, hid under it, cast the Sonorous spell on her voice, crept behind Butler then shouted (with her magically amplified voice) “BOO! GOT YOUR CONK!” in his ear. This caused quite a bit of commotion as Butler grasped his ringing head with one massive hand and swung his arm towards where the deafening yell had come from. Luckily for AFr he was very distracted by the ear-spliiting headache he had received courtesy of her shouting, and hadn’t swung half as hard as he normally would have. But his swing still managed to hit AFr in the chest, sending her flying a few feet on to the chewed lounge.
“Oof!” she said, but then after catching her breath she healed the few broken ribs she had with her magic wand.
“Eh. I’ve had enough of this gazebo,” PhoenixStar said, magicking everyone over to Hogwarts, including Butler and Minerva.
They all arrived near the lake, but no one was around.
“Well,” Katya said. “This sucks.”
No sooner were the words out of her mouth than the giant squid surfaced, and wrapped in its coils was a nuclear submarine.
(Note: You can't see the italics)
AF_roxz   [May 01, 2007 at 01:01 PM]
OMG!!!
u , nicole, r the greatest. this was soo funny!! i started hysterically just a second go with my got ur conk thing.. lol!!
i dont have many suggestions except that
- experillamis is a disarming charm (like making u fly back or get another's wand to (...) to u) nd not a llama turning charm except i luved the llama inseriton caz it was really funny. my advidse change experillam to another charm or keep experillamis nd actully make it do its function of disarming but have some 1 turn the lamp into the llama anyways.
- the memory charm was ment to hit u on purpose not to minera.. but that z okay since itz going with ur theme..
- how does butler (...) in to the picture? u might want to state that in the beginning if ur really gonna put it into fanfic section
- is there a part 2 caz i vaguely rember there was sumthing with fighting on hogwarts with arty nd co nd us
- i liked the voldermort thing!!!
maybe if u wanna keep this minerva hating theme going u can (or i can on dsecond thought) make a seperate one of a duel btw u nd me with the memory being lost nd all .. with voldy being included and all... except it will need to be modified b/c u have minerva being torutred in there as well (as usual may i add).. soo we'll see abt that one
nd thatz it for now.. maybe i ll need to double check sum of my suggestions but respond to them nd tell me wat u think , nicole..
katya345b   [May 01, 2007 at 04:21 PM]
I have thought up some spells we could use on minerva but unfortunatly I have forgoten how to say them(or what theire name is) so i,ll have describe them ; so first of all there is the on james used on snape to make him hang uupsid down just to amuse sirius black then there is the on that snape invented that make you bleed like crazy (I don,t rember it as well) I think well harry uses it on malfoy in book6 then snape comes and fixes it I think it starts whith a s but I definatly think that mineva should be tortured Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy (and btw I'm still iiternaly jelose of my fiiend wif the elf ears)
Celestial Angel   [May 01, 2007 at 08:38 PM]
let's add more people! hmm, who to add.... Ah! How about Mr. Darcy and Miss Elizabeth Bennett. (I liked P&P)
Nicole_artist   [May 02, 2007 at 01:10 AM]
That above is just what I did last night, it's not nearly all of it.

AFR - it's expelliarmus, and you said experillamas. And, somewhat like Wizard Baruffio who said Wingardium Leviofa instead of Leviosa and ended up with a buffalo on his chest, you got an animal similar (in this case exact) to the error.
How does Butler what? Appear? I made him appear, with my magic wand.
I just realised I have a big plot hole. The lounge was turned into a llama but the llama starts chewing the lounge later on. I'll fix it in the real one.
Katya - I know the one. *looks it up* OMG, I just saw that Professor McGonagall's first name is Minerva! Urgh. *continues looking* Eh, I can't find it but I remember (95% sure) that it's Levicorpus. Or is it os...?
I also know the S one you're talking about, I said it myself up there. *points to near top* Septumsempra. Or is it Sectumsempra? Argh! Oh, it's sectum. I just found it.
CA - lol, we have enough people already, and it's not even halfway done.
fairyeyes92   [May 02, 2007 at 06:18 AM]
whta about me? am i not important enough to be included? Crying or Very sadCrying or Very sadCrying or Very sadCrying or Very sadCrying or Very sad
katya345b   [May 02, 2007 at 06:43 PM]
yes those are them Very Happy well I think you should use thoses (fe92 adress your self to nicole cause shes the one writting the storie)
Nicole_artist   [May 03, 2007 at 02:17 AM]
It's not a case of importance, I'm just turning the adventure above into a fanfic. If you somehow participated then you'll be in the fic. And if LEP's 007 doesn't do the pressured moments adventure then I'll combine them.
AF_roxz   [May 04, 2007 at 01:35 PM]
oo nicole i just misspelled it.. but u know wat i m tlking abt.. dont be offensed by the commnets there just sum suggestions..
but u got to keep on working on them nd keep us updated so we can help!! esp me!! lol
katya345b   [May 04, 2007 at 03:35 PM]
oh yes please keep updating it!! Very Happy
Nicole_artist   [May 04, 2007 at 11:22 PM]
Okay, as soon as I get my frequency table and paragraph done, which will take me 10 minutes, I will resume it. The time now (for me) is 5:22. I'll edit this comment if no one's commented by then.
**edit** I did the math thing, and it's now 5:47. I misjudged.
AF_roxz   [May 05, 2007 at 08:25 AM]
i wish i had frequancy tables for math again... back when it was all easier! now i have a math test to go study for! ughh
katya345b   [May 05, 2007 at 10:30 AM]
hum what are frequency tables? I may have don them buut my math is in french so I don'y know the english terms
AF_roxz   [May 05, 2007 at 04:14 PM]
wei? wei?
hehheheheheh
arty's_luna_chick   [May 05, 2007 at 05:33 PM]
nice story nicole! Very Happy
Nicole_artist   [May 05, 2007 at 07:34 PM]
Thankyou! I did some but I didn't put it in my comment, and by the time I was about to I was ordered to bed. I'll put it in now: (And once again there are no italics because fanart doesn't have any fancy things)
The squid, who was normally a gentle kind beast of the sea, had gone crazy when it had been fired upon by the submarine. It was waving the submarine around furiously. If Artemis had been there he would have pointed out that if the submarine flew out of it’s tentacles and hit the ground, it would rip open the covering of the nuclear battery and the nuclear bombs and they would explode with such a force that they would be fried more than McDonalds chicken nuggets, except that they would be reduced to ash and no one, not even a kid who ate worms, would want to eat them.
Not that anyone was thinking that.
“ARHHHH!!! AIEEEEE!!!” came the frightened, shocked yells from the Minerva haters and, of course, Minerva. Butler, who as we all know, at least by now, had assumed general protector of all. So he demanded that Dumbledore conjure up a Sig Sauer, some harpoons and a box of Oreos (he was hungry). Dumbledore did, and Butler scarfed down the Oreos and started attacking the giant squid, carefully avoiding firing at the submarine and dodging flailing tentacles.
Minerva, making a nuisance of herself as usual, ran down to the giant squid to check it out. “You know, no giant squid has ever been found alive as they always stay quite deep down, and are very elusive. I should report this to the Institute of Aquarian Animals, and maybe then I’ll get my Nobel Peace Prize. I’d kill for that prize, you know.”
Perhaps Minerva would have rambled on some more about the prize, but a moment later she was dragged kicking and screaming into the water by the giant squid.
“Damn!” Nicole swore. “I wanted to finish her off!”
“Uh, Nicole…” AFr said. “I think we have bigger problems.”
Nicole stopped gazing grumpily at the giant squid and turned to face the direction where everyone else was looking in wide-eyed shock. Godzilla and a T-rex were battling a kilometre away in the Forbidden Forest, knocking down trees and disturbing crows. The whole group was transfixed by the fantastical creatures roaring at clawing at each other. Eventually they ended up on the Hogwart’s lawn, mere metres from the quaking cluster of Minerva-haters.
“I have an idea,” Katya whispered.
“What?” everyone chorused in an undertone,
“WE RUN FOR OUR ARTEMIS-OBSESSED LIVES!!!” she screamed, and everyone bolted for the castle.
At the exact same moment two things happened. The giant squid, who was now playing with the nuclear battery with a tentacle, mutated because Butler grazed the side of the battery just enough for the tiniest amount of nuclear stuff to make contact with the squid. Minerva, who was somehow still alive (Mary-Sues are hard to kill) escaped from the clutches of the giant squid and swam for her life to the shore. Unfortunately, or fortunately, depending on your point of view, she had a broken arm so it took her quite a while.
Dumbledore was sitting in a deck chair not so far away from all of this, eating popcorn and throwing Jaffas (they were one of his new favourites) at various gaping staff members every now and then. “Hmm…” he murmured. “I think it’s time to call the LEP.”
Using his amazing powers he conjured up a gold with silver stars Motorola V3, called Foaly and told him to send a team to the big blank spot in his surveillance. Then hung up.
Unfortunately, the LEP were currently engaged, and they didn’t really care about a couple of mud-men or mud-maids.
Somehow the assembly of Minerva-haters and Minerva ended up on the school roof through Professor Trelawny’s classroom window. They had decided to get as far away from the fighting as possible, and upwards seemed like a good idea, and they could watch the fight.
But just as they were settling down and conjuring up popcorn, slushies and Jaffas, Minerva rolled down the roof as she couldn’t balance properly with her broken arm.
Suddenly, the member from FanArt called Gerry (who is actually female) pops into existence at the edge of the roof and catches Minerva. Then she heals Minerva’s arm.
“Oh well,” PhoenixStarr said amiably. “At least we can kill her without people complaining she could have beaten us if she wasn’t injured.”
“I deserve a large sum of money and a statue in Haven!” Gerry screeched, almost oblivious to the fact that she was in the presence of Minerva-haters who were about to rip her throat out.
But they don’t get a chance to do that, because none other than Voldemort himself appeared on the edge of the roof and grabbed Minerva.
“Hey!” Nicole yelled in indignation. “She’s the person we’re supposed to be killing. Go find Harry or something.
“Huh,” Voldemort snorted. “I can’t be bothered doing something complicated with him. I just want to kidnap someone and carry out gruesome torture or a painful death.
“Fine,” Katya said.
“No!” Nicole shouted. “Just turn her into a cockroach with some distinguishing features and we’ll deal with her later.
So Voldemort turned her into a cockroach with a blonde wig and markings where her glasses were.
“No!” Gerry said, and pointed her wand at the cockroach to change it back into the annoying blonde person that the group assembled on the roof hated. But everyone, including Voldemort, pointed their wands at her and shouted “Expelliarmus!” (AFr almost said “Experillamas!” again) and she flew off the roof to a hundred metres away, but luckily landed on Hargrid, who broke her fall.
Also, Butler had finally defeated the giant squid. It was floating in the water motionless, but not dead.
Dumbledore had now finished his popcorn, and decided it was time for everything to be sorted out. He transfigured the giant squid back to it’s normal self, Vanished the nuclear submarine and it’s battery, scared Voldemort away and, with a certain amount of hesitation, turned Minerva back into a human and sent her back to the gazebo in the chateau.
“HEY!” Nicole shouted in indignation at the fact Minerva had just been snatched away again. “We were going to-“
But Dumbledore didn’t let her finish the sentence, and transported her and the rest of the Minerva-haters back to exactly where they started.
Now Butler was the only one beside Dumbledore left. Dumbledore winked and conjured a bag of sherbert lemons.
“For your trouble,” he said, deftly throwing them to Butler. He caught them, and even though they were a tasty sweet, at that moment they were also a Portkey, and Butler was whisked back to his charge’s side.
Back at the street where there was a giant celery stick, Nicole yelled out in frustration.
“I’ll get you someday Minerva!”



It's done! Unless I decide to add the story from "Pressured Moments". Should I add it in? As the "sequel"?
arty's_luna_chick   [May 06, 2007 at 12:39 PM]
sorry. this time i'm not reading it. Embarrassed yet at least.
Lily Winterwood   [May 06, 2007 at 08:05 PM]
Eoin Colfer, I'm ashamed of you...Minerva must DIE! Mad Laughing

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